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With each step, I took in, I felt myself walking further in the endless mist of memories . Those memories which should have bought smile to my face, has become a gloomy past.

The thought of her which once made me happy, is making me cry now. There is no place like home but never knew without her in it, it's just stack of brick.

With heavy steps, I moved in. I could still imagine her laying on the couch lazily and watching TV while waiting for me to return from work . As I passed through the kitchen ,  I saw her cooking meals for me. It pains that I can't taste anymore of her food. That's when I realized for the past few months, I haven't faced any problem with food as she was always ready with it. Suddenly I felt pathetic for not even once appreciating her efforts.

Finally, I reached the Last and the only room, our bedroom. I felt a little hesitant before opening the door. I didn't had enough courage to see the room empty without her in it. One part of me told me to back up while the other side told me to walk past the door and at least hold fast her memories.

Shaking my head, I opened the door and walked in gathering up the courage .

Sitting at the edge of the bed, I moved my palms slowly over the fabric , to feel the softness. This place, where I always slept alone, finally had someone to fill in emptiness but now even that is gone.

No matter how bad things get between us , we always reconciled it with a hug on this bed. Laying over it, I rolled myself with her blanket . Till now I pushed back all the tears, but now as I inhaled her scent which were at the verge of fading away , is when I broke down.

Clunching the blankets, I cried my eyes out. I wish she was in this room right now. I wish  I could hear her soft voice of comfort. I wish I could touch her. At that moment I realized that the universe in which I was looking forward for someone to pull me out of pain, have finally left me with my aggravating  pain again.

" Why did you leave me, when I wasn't even ready to say goodbye"

At this moment of extreme despair,  with heavy heart I prayed for this feelings to fade away, just like the snow on the mountains.

Suddenly I felt need to sleep. I just wanted to close my eyes tight and let go of all these pain . For the past month, I stayed away from her , fought mentally with Rm, made her go through all the terror of being alone without any surface to wipe away the irrational thoughts just for the name of protecting her.

But the moment I lost her, I failed. I failed to protect her. I broke the promise of bringing her normal life back. I failed to bring tears of joy on her face. I still can't forget the eyes, which was filled with mixture of regret and pain.

She saved me with the same warm smile, she held while proposing me but couldn't have any promising time with me.

When I look back at my life it is just mistake, fear, anxiety, pain, heartache and tears  ,blood but now time has added regret to it. I regret not spending one second extra with her. Not loving her one inch above. Not holding her more close to me. Not smiling an inch wide at her when she was holding onto her last breathe.

I squeezed my eyes shut just for these emotions wash away  like my tears.

Out of blue, I heard soft cries. Opening my eyes, I thought I heard my inner self crying. But the muffles looked too realistic to call it illusion.

Hopping out of bed, I walked towards the source of sound. With each step forward, the soft cries were getting much clear and audible. When I finally realized the place of source, I quickly ran towards it. With wide steps, I ran upstairs to the only room I would resent till my death.

I bursted through door in and froze right at the spot. I couldn't believe my own eyes. For a second I thought I was dreaming, but deep down I know I have been gifted the biggest mirage.

Paranoid and disoriented, I took small steps towards the little crying figure over the table. With shaky hands, I picked up the little human and sat down on the floor.

Placing it on my lap, I carefully examined the feature of baby. Same eyes , nose, lips but was much beautiful then her. This little human on my lap was holding a much clearer galaxy, the pouty lips were much redder and the nose looked much cuter then the one she had.

Holding the soft hands, I stroked it gently and smiled at the little figure who was slowly growing patient. Her mini palms engulfed inside my palms.

And Just when I was wondering the reason for my existence, she finally left me with a reason to breathe. Pulling out the necklace from my pocket, I tied it across our daughter neck. 'Y' shaped pendulum dancing effortlessly over her skin.

Smiling through tears, I petted my daughter head, her lips gradually not trembling , feeling her father's touch. She bought her thumb to her mouth and started licking it.  I laughed softly, at her cuteness . Lifting her up, I hugged her softly. 

Breaking the hug, I looked over the two Petalled flower, finally changing into three Petalled, radiating much stronger purple energy then before.

Chuckling bitterly, I realized one thing. This room is where I lost my mom, got my curse, understood the word love, lost y/n and gifted with our daughter only to  add misery to this innocent soul. I will never allow this curse which changed my fate, to descend to our daughter . I leaned forward towards the peacefully sleeping figure in my arms and kissed her forhead . That moment I swore to myself

" I will never allow this curse to affect our daughter. I will make sure this ends with me"

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ARTFUL Roses ( Suga Ff  ) Where stories live. Discover now