Mixed Signals

Ballsy much

Maryam's pov
Saihou left and I closed the door behind him dreading 'the talk' I'm about to have with my dad. We don't mention my mom in this house and since he did I can tell there are some bottles up emotions there it was just too obvious and it hurts me seeing him like that.

Am standing at my dad's bedroom door with my hand hanging mid air dreading the simple knock that was so easy to make before all hell broke lose. My heart is racing but I pushed my hand to collide with the door in a knock that sounds barely audible.

"Come in" my dad says
I went inside and sat down on the bed with Latif laying beside my dad on his tablet.
"Daddy..." was all I could say to him
"Maryam I'm really sorry about what I said earlier" my dad says
"Then why did you say it and that too in front of Saihou" courage that I didn't know I had two minutes ago showed up out of no where
"It's just that your reaction reminded me of your mother and I know I don't tell you this but you remind me so much of her and I'm scared you would turn out just like her" ouch!

This really hurts and the fact that my dad thinks that of me scares me. Am I really like that?
"You have so many of her good qualities that I am and will always be proud of but I can see her bad qualities showing up in the background and that scares me. I don't want you to turn out like her and I can always see anger in your eyes all the time. I want you to be a good woman and I want you to be a fearless woman but I don't want you to be proud." my dad picks his word with care
" I have done everything that I thought was right all my life. I have grown beyond my age because I thought that was what you wanted and more than anything I want you to be proud of me. I have tried to not even like the things my mother used to like because I'm afraid it would make you remember her. After all that you stand there today to tell me that I am becoming like her"I said to my dad in between tears.

I can't remember the last time I shade a tear but the type of hurt I'm feeling right now is too much and I have to let some of it out.

My dad looked at me for a long time and I bow my head down. I have never felt ashamed in front of my dad ever but that is all I feel right now
"You are very intelligent, caring and an amazing daughter I couldn't have asked for a better daughter and I am so proud of you. I just want you to take charge of your temper and not let your anger turn you into the person you are not. You keep fighting and arguing with people and it's not okay. You and Latif are all I've got and I want you to always remember that he looks up to you too." my dad says not looking at me still

I completely understand what my dad is saying and his outburst earlier is justified. More than him even I do not want to do what my mom did it's horrible and no mother no matter the circumstances should ever abandon her children. I just hope one dad I will get to talk to her about what she did to us and hopefully get the apology we deserve but until then I guess I have to just keep assuming why she left because I feel like my dad doesn't tell me the full story anytime I ask.

We both sat there in silence until my dad spoke but this time to Latif who is still on his tablet playing games completely oblivious to the tension in the room
"Latif you want some noodles" my dad asks Latif. Noodles are almost the only thing we eat these days. I made a mental note to cook tomorrow.
"Yeah noodles, bread, juice and I want an egg too  only" he says
"Yeah righ only, it's not much is it?" I ask him
"No today I'm only eating one egg, I'm not hungry" he says again I don't think he understands my sarcasm but okay
"If you were hungry then you might eat the whole house" I say and got up to leave whilst he complains about me to my dad.

Saihou's pov
At 10:25 I received another message from Binta again

'I'm outside your gate please come out' the message read.
Bro what the fuck is happening. I went outside and saw Binta on her phone typing so I called out to her and she ran to hug me. She moved back and I saw she was wearing my old t shirt that she took from my room when she came over. If there is one thing Binta knows is that I love that shirt on her, it adds a little touch of me on her because we don't have alot in common so it makes me see a little bit of myself in her.

"Babe I miss you" Binta says
"It's Saihou for you, what's this all about" I asked perplexed by the sudden show of affection
"You know that I love you I always have and I always will" Binta says
"You love but you still broke up with me and started dating that Arrah guy and you know we don't get along at all. Why are you so manipulative and why the hell are you wearing that shirt" I said to her I know the last part is so unnecessary but fuck that right now

Before I could even fathom what is happening Binta grabs me by my neck and tried to kiss me with all her might. I pushed her away from me and she landed on her butt. I immediately reached out to help her up but she pushed me and stood up by herself
"It's that bitch isn't it" she says with spite clear in her voice

"Don't call her that" I say to her am not going to stand here and listen to her disrespect Maryam like that
"She stold you away from you and turned you against me. You know you love me and you will come back to me because you always do and I have you wrapped around my finger" Binta says
"I don't know if you notice this but you sound crazy" I said to her
"I will show you crazy just wait and watch" Binta says and walks away and I almost laugh out loud at her swaying her hips forcefully.

Immediately I went inside I called Maryam but her voice didn't have the playful tone it always has so I decided to brush it off and lighten the moon, she will tell me when she feels comfortable enough.
"Guess who came to my house right now" I say to her
"Beyonce" she responds
"I wish but take another guess a not so wild one this time" I asked again
"Ummmmm Tiwa Savage maybe?" she asked again
"You know what I'll just tell you" I say and I can tell she is taunting me
"It's Binta" I say to her
"Yeah okay so?" now I regret telling her anything about it
"So I'll take it that you don't care now do you?" I say to her but deep down I'm a little dissapointed by her reaction.

I don't know what I was expecting but it isn't this
"Ohhhh my bad I didn't know I should care about your ex girlfriend that threatened me to leave you" she says and starts laughing
"Is that a little jealousy I sense there" I taunt her back
"Well you see for yourself" she is definitely jealous and I'm low key very happy about that
"You don't have to worry about her or another girl getting to me" I say to her sincerely
"That's what you're saying so I'll take that" She says
"You don't have a choice" I say to her
"Amadou would say another thing, don't you think?" she asked and I just feel like throwing my phone against the wall but I have to keep my cool don't want to spiral out of control again
"He won't be saying anything because you won't see or hear from him. You are my girl" I say to her trying to convince both myself and her
"Is Saihou claiming me or am i just hearing things? " she says laughing again
"You are so naive" I say to her
"So I'm guessing you are ballsy" Maryam says
"Making words up now, are we?" She's impossible
"Anyway I'm cooking tomorrow and I want you to come" she says

Hey guys,
Thanks to everyone that hs been sharing I really appreciate it. Please vote and comment I would love to read your opinions♥️