In 500... (or less)

Harried Handlers

Something had to be done. We had to keep him under control.

"Look, I'll stick by him until the end," Pete said, "but sometimes the stuff he says is just so off the wall."

"Well, I don't see any thing wrong with what he said," Simon retorted. "It was the truth, wasn't it?"

I always thought Simon was a bit of a zealot. Blinded by sheer devotion to the boss.

"What do you think, Thad?" Pete hardly ever spoke to me. I struggled to think of something intelligent to say.

"Well, I...um..."

"He agrees with the rest of us," Andy said. "The boss may be right, but he's gotta have a little more tact about it. He's gonna get himself arrested. Or worse."

His latest rant about hypocritical religious leaders might have been a stinging truth, but it pissed off quite a few people.

"He might have crossed the line calling them 'blind fools'," I said. "I mean, that probably alienated the blind."

Pete looked flustered. I was having trouble whether he was upset at the situation or my answer in particular.

"Matt, what are the people in your circles saying?" Pete asked.

"Not a lot," he replied. "I don't know if that's good or bad."

"I think we all can agree that we've got to keep the boss off of Twitter for a few weeks," Pete said. "At least until after the holiday. Let things die down a little."

"Yeah," Andy said. "The 'den of thieves' thing with the bankers the other day too, I think he ought to get him working the food bank again or something. You know, a good photo op."

Everyone nodded, except for Jay.

"I'm thinking of getting out," he said, slumping his shoulders. "Every day I find myself defending one thing or another. I'm getting tired of it."

"I can't believe what I'm hearing," Simon grumbled. "You knew it would be like this when you signed up for the job. Fine then. Don't forget the non-disclosure agreement you signed."

"C'mon Simon, we know Jay wouldn't sell out the boss or his secrets," Matt said. Matt had confided in me that he was writing a book, but insisted it was only going to be an accurate accounting of what was going on, not a tell-all. I glanced at him and he gave me a wary look of pleading to remain silent.

"Jay's one of us," Andy said. "He's been here since the beginning."

"Ok, ok. So...nix the caustic tweets, get him out to the food bank...any other ideas?" Pete surveyed the room for suggestions.

"Maybe a fishing trip? Get away from it all?" Andy said.

"That's a good one too." Pete scribbled it down on his notepad. Just then his cell phone rang.

"You're doing what now? A public appearance after dinner tonight?" It was the boss, and Pete wasn't good at hiding his disapproval of the idea.

"Well where?" Pete said, pausing for the answer. "The garden? What garden? Gethsemane?! I don't think that's the best idea!"

We agreed. Well, except for Jay. He must have slipped out while Pete was on the phone.