What Belongs to Me [COMPLETE]

Chapter 9 "I Care"

Everyone was so busy and focused on their drafting tables, plotting their white paper on the table top. The air disposed by the four metal ceiling fans of our classroom is especially not so helpful at the moment, even the wind that’s entering the mullioned picture window can’t beat the dipping temperature. I was carefully drawing my template when someone tapped my back, I half gazed at it and i saw Sam putting her wide smile with pressed lips, i raised my left brow.
“Can I borrow your masking tape? She asked.
“Yeah right, again! Here…” I said, extending it to her immediately because i have no time to waste.
“Thanks” she said smiling widely and then we proceeded on doing our own thing.

Ma’am Glaiza was now giving her instructions in front; leaning her butt against her table, both hands rested on her waist and her legs were crossed slightly. She’s wearing a black high-waisted trouser and a plain white tube-top with a floral pink and purple short blazer, and her single silver leaf-shaped earing was dangling brightly on her left ear.
“Guys, you have to finish that before lunch, ok?” she said. Everyone was then muttering and mumbling something in hushed voices, obviously disagreeing but actually has no choice, so we all said flatly,
“Yes ma’am”.
We were all very busy rushing her requirements when we heard her talking repulsively. Everyone looked at her while she’s commenting on one of our classmate’s board,
“Wow, you’re doing great! My seven year old daughter can also do that. It was really like that.” Calling out her daughter who's busy scribbling on her book, “Hey Stacey, come here baby, honey, look at his drawing, you can also do that right?” Now, all of us were glancing at each other in disbelief, 'there she goes again with her sarcasm'. How can she humiliate him so perfectly? ‘What a bitch!” I screamed in my mind.

After that, we all felt uneasyness while drafting. I was even more bothered when my phone started buzzing inside my pocket. My forehead was popping sweats because of the tension from what just happened plus the high temperature inside the classroom.

My phone inside my pocket was really disturbing me, I can’t really focus because of it, so I decided to check who has been calling me. It’s Cizar, but what does he want so urgently that he’s calling me non-stop. I was thinking if I will answer him, but just when I was about to swipe and receive his call, it stop buzzing and disappeared from the screen. I noticed that he left so many messages on my messenger and even a voice message.

He said on his messages in order; “hey” “can I ask a favor?” “Please” “What time are you coming?” "I’m in your room right now.” "My head is burning with high fever, and I don’t have energy left for me to stand” “Can you buy me food and medicine?” “Please?”
And then I played the voice message at the bottom,
“Hey please, hurry and come home! I’m just so sick right now, please? I need you…” his voice is so shushed and I could hear the pleading tone in it. Why me? Why don’t he call his girlfriend? He knows I’m a busy person. What should I do with him? He’s in my room? I’m getting anxious, I don’t know what to feel.
I replied him, “Can’t you really go down and buy food at the store?” he chatted back in a millisecond,
“I can’t… please?” he was desperate.
“I’m in the middle of class, drafting, what should I do then?”
“Please?” he said again, my heart sunk.
“Ok! I’ll go home immediately once I finish this; I had to do this first. Hold on there” I cooled of my mind to think straightly, I rushed to finish my plates and after I handed it to ma’am Glaiza. I asked my seatmate Charm if what is the medicine for fever, she is a registered nurse that studied again for interior design because it was her passion. I was somewhat close to her because of some issue between us before that it's better not to mention. After she told me what medicine was it, she asked me,
“For whom? For you?” she gasped concernly.
“Yes for me, my head is burning because of the high temperature today” I lied. I went directly to the drugstore to buy paracetamol for adult and went to the food court to buy him his food and then I hurriedly went to my apartment.
For a moment before I opened my bedroom, I stood there silently thinking. What am I doing here? Taking care of this man, his not even my boyfriend and who knows if he has a girlfriend. What am I doing, putting my plates at risk just because of this man? It’s not so me, I thought. But in spite of my frustration, I still managed to relaxed and composed myself and opened the door.
“How are you?” I asked but he’s not talking. He wrapped himself with my blanket like a cocoon on my bed.
“Hey I’m here now” but the words I’m uttering were just hanging in the air, it’s the first time this man is not saying anything, not being talkative, I was thinking. I prepared his food, a fried chicken because I knew that it’s his favorite and then poured a glass of water. I gently shook his shoulder, rubbing it softly to wake him up,
“Cizar, come on. Sit down so you can eat” he sat down half awake, his eyes were still sleepy. I handed him the plate,
“Call me over there at my table when you’re done eating so you can have your medicine”
“Feed me” He said joking, trying to giggle but his energy was really low.
“Stop joking and eat your food already” I rolled my eyes, “big baby” I said at him frowning.

After barely five minutes digging on his food, he called me and said, “I’m done” leaning his head on the wall. I came to him and held the glass of water for him to drink his medicine.
“Thank you, so much. I owe you one” he said after gulping twice.
“It’s alright, you’re always welcome Cizar” I said with my most compasionate look. I helped him lay himself to the bed, covering him with my blanket and telling him,
“Rest well, I’ll be right here.” Then I spread my extra comforter on the floor beside my bed, beside him, and while reading the book that I just borrowed from the library, I dozed off with the book in my hand and rested on my navel.

(We wandered for hours, in this vast field of meadow with various type of beautiful and exotic flowers that was wierdly unrecognizable for me, given that i know lots of plants and walking hand in hand with Cizar. We’re both wearing cleaned white cotton long-sleeves and white loose trousers. We didn’t care if the people were looking at us, judging our sweetness and affection to each other. We took plenty of photographs everywhere we went, museums and parks, just everywhere. I was wiping his sweaty forehead and his back and him doing the same to me. We ate ice cream to beat the dipping temperature and me wiping his mouth when he messes the corner of his lips as he always does. But as we were walking at the city plaza holding hands, I accidentally let go of his hand in the crowds. I was calling his name crying out, Cizar! Cizar! Cizar! But I can’t find him in those so many people.)

I was panting when I woke up and Cizar was beside me grabbing and shaking my arms tightly,
“Hey wake up, it’s ok, it’s ok” he was saying.
“What happened?” I asked him.
“I was sleeping when I heard you calling out my name; you even teared with closed eyes. What is it?” he asked with knitted brows and I couldn't hide my embarassment.
“Ah, that was nothing, don’t worry too much, go back to sleep” I was just about to go back to sleep when he told me,
“Please stay on the bed, the floor is hard, you might catch a cold” he offered me.
“Are you ok now, how are you feeling?” I asked him with a gloomy face.
“Not really... but yeah, I’m feeling a little better now though”
“Ok then, thanks” I said
“No… thanks to you, I got better”
“No prob!” i mumbled and then I climbed on my bed.

After what happened, I felt an extreme shame. Why now? Why did I mention his name on my sleep? I was really bothered thinking about the meaning of it. Why am I dreaming about this man? The questions keeps burning and turning and swirling inside my head until I fell in deep sleep, turning my back on him.
After two hours of a nap, I tried to move my body and tried to stretched my arms but I couldn’t seem to do so. Something was blocking me. I tried to open my eyes and then I realized that there’s a body in front of me. That Cizar was sleeping beside me, with his back at me. And my face was buried at the curved of his neck, my left arm is wrapped around his chest hugging him tightly. He is so sound asleep while snoring beautifully and I didn’t know what to do, whether to wake him up or stay like that until he wakes up. But no! I said, I unwrapped my body slowly and gently from him and left him on the bed.
He continued sleeping soundly and I stayed awake, looking out the darkened window. The golden-orange color of the sky is probably gone by now, i thought.

When he woke up,
“I wan’na ask something” he said rubbing his eyes gently. I suddenly felt uneasiness thinking of what is he going to ask. He might ask what happened in bed. But thanks God, I still managed to composed myself and act normal.
“What is it?” I mumbled thinking of telling him nothing happen when he’ll ask.
“Do you have spare time? Can you draw something for me? You know I sucked in arts.” he said pouting his lips.
“Oh is that it” yeah sure.” I said while being grateful inside that he didn’t ask the question I was thinking, not even considering if I have time to do his request in the middle of my busyness.
He left a puzzle in my head after what happened. But I was ashamed to ask him, if why was he on my bed? What really happened? It’s the same with him, it looks like he doesn’t want to talk about it, and he’s not even bringing up the topic.

It doesn’t mean that I’m not offended at all, the other side of me happened to be expecting him on initiating. Can’t he at least show that he is also bothered even in the slightest way he could? I’m not especially pleased with how he’s acting and his icy stare right that moment.
With wrinkled nose and pursed lips, I stood up turning my back at him and pretending I was checking something on my paper works. He then got up from my bed saying,
“I’m going to my room now, I just remembered I have something to do.” Obviously eating his voice. Now, that’s it! I thought. That’s the common reason people say when they don’t want to talk anymore and explain themselves. I didn’t respond to what he said and just continue faking my business.

I decided on avoiding him, and besides, I am a busy person to begin with. I sighed with relief when he finally left my room. This is what I needed right now, I thought. I need space so that I can breathe freshly and can renew my strength at this moment. So that I can focus on my schooling, finals’ is already approaching, waving at me right now. I swallowed my thoughts heavily and exhaling with my pursed lips in frustration. Because even when he is physically gone; he left his scent on my bed, in my room, hanging in every corner of my place. He just can’t leave me alone and making my head aches, always thinking of him.