What Belongs to Me [COMPLETE]

Epilogue

2020

Cizar pleaded to me with humility and modesty, beg me to turn down the two-year contract in designing a hotel-resort in Milan. He told me that he can't be sane without me on his side and even asked me to stay with him at Penablanca city, at his house which he claim our house and to live a simple and innocent life. I really wanted to sign and ink the contract because i know that it will put me to more exposure and will bring me to the global stage which is one of my top goals in my career. But i was hesitant to proceed because of Cizar, for i don't want to lose him again, to be away from him again even for the slightest chance. I knew that Mr. Destiny was playing and trying me again that's why i didn't rush my decision, i humbly asked the Countess to give me more time to think about it.

After going through a lot of thinking, i had decided in my mind to stay and to decline the offer and to settle down with what i have, with Cizar. But suddenly and unexpectedly, Cizar brought up the topic over one of our luxurious dinner date in our usual dating place and told me that he is now ready to let me go. My face was entirely and totally frozen when he said these, i couldn't move my hands that was rested on the glass table top and i could see my numbing knees under the transparent table. He told me to go and do what really makes me happy, to go and claim the things that can fullfill the missing treasures in my heart. He said that he will be always supporting me with what i like and always be watching me from afar as what he has done so far for the past eight years. My feelings was yet again shattered in small and sharp peices inside my chest- pricking my heart incessantly but i was just holding back my tears from streaming on my cheeks while he was talking because for the second time. He is again ready and prepared to suffer just because of me, just because of my selfishness and my personal obsessions. I wanted to tell him that i wanted to stay but in my heart, i also really wanted to go and finally he had given me his approval. I hated myself because of my indecision and so we became quite over dinner. We got up and went to our my place without saying anything because whatever word or phrase we would say will not change anything anymore. And even worse because i could feel that he turned to be so cold towards me in the days that followed. It left me thinking; 'so this is it? This is the ending of my love story with him? Ending to all the challenges that i had been through since i first met him? And now this is how i will remember our love story; two man who passionately fell inlove with each other but eventually broken apart at the end.

I went back to my hometown, to once again say my farewell to my parents and my bro, Mama was crying when i told her about my plan and she was begging me to just stay. Telling me that Manila is aready far from home and that i could barely even visit them, and now i'm telling them about moving much farther again. I explained that it's just for two years and i will be back by then for good, but Papa told me as if he did his assignment perfectly. That he knows how the industry that i belong too works, that when i'll be successful with this certain project, i'll continue to reach for higher place and lift my   position. And i'm guilty of it, because i just couldn't stop, i was never satisfied with what i had, hunger for pride and fame is what always driving me. I was silent while Papa was telling me these but i just simply told them that i had already made my decision.

I began packing the important things inside my walk-in closet, was fixing and cleaning my painting room when my eyes was darted to the huge dusty boxes on top of the cabinets. It was my stuffs when i was still in college, it reminded me that i never threw any plates that i made. Even the one with full of red marks from my proffesors and the boards with a zero score. I valued everything, the sweat and sleepless nights i had just to make and create them. I was smiling and chuckling alone the whole time i was scanning and going through every pieces on the boxes. Until i saw my personal notebook that has the name of Cizar on it which he had written using my lettering guide. The notebook where my secrets and myseries are, the poems i made, the short stories and the secret letters i made for anybody who has been part of my life, pain and sufferings. I was reading them one by one and detailedly when i saw something that i didn't wrote and it's definitely not my penmanship, it was Cizar's;
"Lheam Lamarca, i hate you big time because you had me with your charm and i don't understand but i was always looking and waiting for you. I can't imagine my life without you, and i demand that you take responsibility for this, i don't know but i fucking love you Lheam." I was shocked and stiffened for a second,
'Cizar, how can you have so many surprises! Damn you' i said with my eyes already gleaming with tears. I continued looking at my stuffs and i found my globe stuff toy, my hands began shaking when i saw something on the globe, it was written on the map of Australia near Perth; "I LOVE YOU LHEAM". I closed my eyes and when i finally opened it, my tears began to stream like a let out dam that had been suppressed for so long. 'How can it be that i didn't see this before when i was still in college, if so, will things be the same as now? I guess Mr. Destiny hid it from me so that i can't be distracted in focusing on my dreams. But why is he showing me this now? What is he meaning to tell me? Now that i'm about to fly to the other side of the world again.' this thought began agitating and alarming me.

My things were already set and in just few days, i'm now going to Italy for the contract signing with the Countess along with Skrivo. I wasn't hearing anything from Cizar for the past week nor seeing his shadow near me, i guess he is mad at me and i couldn't blame him, i believed his decision is already final in letting me go. But if; if he would just try to stop me one more time, just another "please stay!" and i would have stay but unfortunately he didn't. I came back at my place in Manila with my Louis Vuitton luggages. I took pictures of the afternoon sun that was very beautiful creating prismatic effect on the glass elevetor as i am ascending the tower. I posted it on my Instagram story as what i was doing every four hours to keep my followers updated and for Cizar to know that i was just okay and to inform him if where i am. Cizar was always attentive to all my post on my social media account that's why he always knew where i was and i was sure that he knows that i am already on my condo. The beautiful scene made me think that; i would never see these magnificent sight again and it will directly go to the archive of my memory.

I pulled my luggage through the clean and shiny massive marble flooring and stood in front of my door and searching for the key inside my black Moschino belt bag. I was about to insert the keys when i saw the glittered phrases on styro that was glued on my door which i didn't noticed immediately when i was digging my bag. Because of my deep shock, I abruptly dropped the keys to the floor creating an annoying sound and I covered my mouth with my hands when I read the phrase that says;
"Will you just stay beside me forever and will you be my husband?"
'oh my God' i gasped in the freshened air of the hallway while the door slowly opened astonishingly, a very handsome and gorgeous man in a  bluish-green pair of tuxedo holding a big bouquet of red roses is coming out in slow motion smiling widely with his eyes glued on mine. I couldn't help myself but to smile also while he knelt in front of me, giving me the bouquet of stunningly arranged roses. I accepted it and raised the healthily glowing red roses and smell its intoxicating fragrance. When i lowered it to look at Cizar, he was still kneeling on the floor with his raised right hand and a bluish diamond ring in silver frame was sandwiched between his thumb and pointed finger delicately. And then he began saying what he has been trying to say and what i have been waiting for him to ask;
"Will you marry me Mr. Lheam Lamarca?" He said with his twinkling eyes and his lips pressed together waiting for my response in deep anticipation.
"Cizar..." i breathed. "Of course" i then gasped.
"Sooo....." He said waiting for the right response.
"Yes! Yes Cizar Borgia! I will marry you!" I said loudly, almost like a shout. And so i pulled him up to my arms and held his face tightly but gently, pelvis to pelvis and then i pressed my lips on his juicy lips.
"I miss you so much!" He said kissing my neck, and then i whispered to his ears,
"Come on Ceasare Borgia, my future husband. Bring me inside now so that you can show me just how much you missed me."