Fractured Heartstrings

Ch 18

Alyssa's POV
__________

I rushed through the hallway, long never ending hallway. To the corner of his room, more likely my ex room by now. I praying like a priest that he would've been there, for some odd reason I was so hopeful begging on my knees. After the past days where I haven't heard his voice through voicemail, I was scared over hell in worries.

I held the spare key in my hand, twisting the door wide open to a completely empty room. Barely nothing was in the room except my things I had left carelessly lying around. The glass was still shattered but not the bottles I had drank from, following along with the mess of a room was more blood marks along the room, not nearly as bad that day I broke down though. There were notes all around and trashed, including his phone bill which seemed to be flying over dollars.

My eyes stranded over the room once more, searching through the small empty kitchen next to the lonely living room. "William" I whispered softly, smart enough to tell he was no longer in our home. "Please" I pleaded with the memories leaking out my eyes next to streaming down my cheek.

If I hadn't of been so stupid, or late enough to realize how crazily mad I had gotten. To realize I was the bad guy, looking for nothing more than revenge and mercy. If I hadn't of been so late in the game to realize it might've been ended or over. To late to realize it's normal to break promises on ourselves, because not noticing - I had lived by that my whole life.

I shook my head and quickly enough covered my mouth, before plopping back down on the bed. The cold empty bed, where we could've shared more memories or laid happily next to each other. But no longer would I get to fell that no more, if I had been earlier to realize I could've possibly saved our forever. But I was quick enough to realize one thing, he was smart enough to not waste his time on such a drunk and broken girl, who miserably didn't take her time not notice the simple things he did do and simple caring things he would've did. Yet he confessed to still loving me, why was it I was doubting myself deeply.

"Why am I so stupid when it comes to love. Why did I ever bother with anyone. Why did I break so many willing hearts. Why am I always so late to realize I'm the one to do more damage. If only if only, I would've figured it all out sooner. I could've saved millions of shattering hearts. I'm more of a monster now, breaking the most important promises of what I was supposed to be"

As I laid restlessly on the cold empty bed, noticing the very visible tears that seemed to stain his pillow and my side of the bed. Though I had darted my eyes towards a brightly flashing shining figure across the room that had caught my attention. I brought my body upwards and raced myself to the shining bright paper, written a note and ticket beside it.

Dear my forever (or maybe now forgotten, lost or broken;) angel,
I know I left you heartbroken in tears,
I wanted nothing more than you,
Now thinking back I was hoping for years,
To spend all my time with you,
I lost that chance,
With one simple glance with someone else than you,
I'm just as broken as you,
Ashamed of what I've done to hurt you,
Though my heart aches through,
I still can't seem to get over you,
Then it must be me,
Thinking you might actually read this horribly written poem,
But my heart forces to go on,
I simple can't get over you,
There's so much more I wanted with you,
So much more I had to say,
So much more I need to explain,
But I clearly screwed up big,
So if you wish,
To speak to me last more,
Check to your left lovely,
My beautiful angel that I can't seem to forget,
I loved you then,
Clearly love you now,
Can't seem to un-frown,
For what I've done,
But I'll love you forever 'till I'm done.