Chasing After The Wind [P.JM]

XXII

KIM YUN-SEO'S POV

오후 11시 24 분

"How do people even do this?" I whined for the third time, not knowing what to do anymore. The kitchen looked so messed up and these noodles aren't even cooperating as well. I cut up a bunch of certain veggies, and they were the only that turned out a bit acceptable. I've been wanting to eat homemade Jajangmyeon since yesterday, and I'm not sure what got into my mind but I attempted to make it from scratch.

"Aish!" I glared at the diluted black bean sauce and took my phone, dialing Jimin's number without caring how it was already eleven at night. Why Jimin? Because he's the only one I can disturb without shame. I averted the call into facetime, letting him see me and the kitchen. Before he could even speak, he gasped for some reason. "What are you even doing?"

"I'm sooo hungry! I wanted to eat homemade Jajangmyeon so I was thinking of making one myself. Can you teach me?" I asked, while my eyes told him that he had no choice. He rolled his eyes and sat up on the bed. "Cut up some pork belly and sauté them. You don't need to add oil."

"Uh, I didn't buy pork belly?" I said, seeing him sigh on the screen. "Great. Just.. stir fry some potatoes and onion then. Put some black bean sauce in there too."

"Alright. Wait, I put the sauce first, right? Like.. do I need to boil potatoes?" I asked. Jimin replied, "No no, don't boil—"

"Oh and, what noodles do I need—"

"Just eat instant noodles and sleep!" Jimin cut me off, annoyance showing obviously through his voice. What's wrong with him? Can't a person ask questions? If he thinks I'm annoying, he's just as annoying.

"Fine! I'll just eat jajangmyeon tomorrow!" I raged at the phone and hung up when he was still trying to speak. Too soon to give up, I searched up some recipes and tried my best to follow it, although I kept messing up a lot.

A few minutes later, an unexpected visitor showed up at my door. I opened the door and just stood there with my arms folded over my chest, eyes staring aggressively at him. "Why are you here?"

"I—" He looked over at my kitchen and fanned his nose. I realized that it was the smell of burnt noodles. We both panicked, but he quickly fixed it up a bit after a while. I don't appreciate him being impatient with me during the call, but I sure do admire how he came to fix my mess.

"Am I that handsome that you can't stop staring?" Jimin glanced at me, though he quickly went back on what he was cooking. Comintg out of my senses, I was quick to realize that I'd been staring at him like a lost pup for the last few minutes. "H-Huh?"

He only chuckled without replying any more. Later on, Jimin called me over, saying that the noodles were done. I sprinted to the kitchen and sat up on the kitchen island, taking a slurp of the black bean noodles. It wasn't the best thing in the world but it did taste so good given that I've been craving it the past few days. "It's good!"

"Ah. Really.." Jimin replied, and not too long after, we were in awkward silence — out of topic and just... staring at each other. While our eyes were locked, my lips urged me to say something which I intended as a joke, "Why are you making me feel things I've never felt before?"

"What do you mean?" He replied, confusion painted in his face. I giggled at his reaction and mumbled, "just kidding," to lessen the tension building up. I didn't want him to feel uncomfortable around me.

We ate across each other, him on the other side of the table. I suddenly thought of something while being reminded of his presence. It was too quiet except the slurping, so I spoke. "You know, maybe if you rode the bus at that time everyday, you would've met me earlier. You wouldn't have to deal with the pain and by now, you would've already fallen for me." I laughed at the last sentence, trying to signal him that that part wasn't serious.

Heavy rain poured later that night. It was pouring hard outside, and the thunder was roaring along with the lightning strikes. It was already past midnight so I doubted that Jimin could still get home by then. "You can stay over. It's raining so hard outside." I looked over at the huge window.

"It's fine, I brought my car." He insisted, already on his way to the doorstep. I sighed like an impatient mother, "No. Way. No way."

After some difficult convincing, he agreed to stay the night — or dawn, to be exact. I gave him some of my bigger clothes, which fitted him just right. Wasn't it completely opposite to the stereotypes in Korean Dramas? Funny.

I sat on the floor by the window and just listened to the faint sound of rain. I found it peaceful, much peaceful than human words, compliments, and sweet lies. Everything has a potential to be a lie when it comes from a human's mouth, doesn't it?

Jimin stood behind me, also watching the rain. "Does it really get better... or do we just get used to it?" It was there, in his words that were so transparent. I could see well how he was barely moving on.

"La douleur exquise." I muttered, him staying quiet and confused. "The heart-wrenching pain of wanting the affection of someone unattainable." I looked behind to meet his brown eyes, "You know.. Jimin.."

"You can't change things by loving them harder."

sometimes we're too focused
on things that hurt us
to see those who
heal us.