This Is How It Goes

Chapter Fourteen: Perfect

I’ve slept with four people. I know that you want to know. I get it, you’re curious. Especially about a girl so comfortable in her sexuality that she’s okay with casual sex. It’s not normal, maybe it’s immoral, and perhaps I’ll regret it one day. But right now I like it and it makes me happy. Content. I don’t have any regrets about the way I live my life. Because one day, we’re all going to die. I’d rather live a good life, that lasts half as long, compared to a boring one.  

My first bed buddy you already know about. So that’s boring and we don’t need to discuss that any further. For now.

My second was when I was seventeen. He was in my chemistry class, Evan Dry. I thought his name was hilarious, I told him as much. I don’t think he minded. We dated for six months and had sex after the first. He wasn’t conventionally beautiful. His nose was too long and too wide, he had a permanent scowl set upon his face and his hair was nearly always greasy. But he had the body of a Greek god and he always, always treated me well. Let me be me. And he loved me. I loved him too. We broke up the week before I turned eighteen. Broke my heart. It still hurts.

My third was Luke Rimmington. A college guy that was visiting his family on spring break. He’d been a senior when I was in my sophomore year of high school. Lea being the gem that she is introduced us. We had a thing for three weeks and it was nice. Nothing too special. But he always smelled amazing and he constantly told me I was beautiful. I liked that. A lot more than I liked him. I think he went to Princeton but I don’t quite remember. We saw each other briefly again over the summer but we both decided to let things be. Our time was in the spring, when the weather is warm in the afternoon and cool in the mornings. Summer was too harsh for us.

Isaac was my fourth. My perfect, perfect fourth. I almost wish he was my first. I wish I’d met him when I was sixteen so we could have had some stupid high school romance interrupted only by the promise of college and bitchy girls, determined to ruin us. I wish I’d met him when I wanted a relationship. But I didn’t. And I’m not going back on my word. I am going to live out my first year of college the way I planned. I have plenty more time to be soppy and have my heart broken. This year is dedicated to casual sex, alcohol, a reasonable amount of study and meeting new people. I will not jeopardize that for a boy, one that I will only end up hating some time in the near or distant future. Relationships end in marriage or divorce. And I sure as hell ain’t going to be the fool that marries the first boy they meet at college.

My fifth is going to be James Kitcher.

***

After we’ve purchased a box of Krispy Kreme’s, a bottle of cheap red wine and thoroughly annoyed our cab driver by making him taxi us all over town we stop off at his apartment. It’s small, not what I expected. The complex comprises of ten or so tenants with James occupying the fourth floor. It’s two bedroom, one bathroom and the kitchen and lounge are smaller than my room at college.

James sets the Krispy Kreme’s on the coffee table, I take off his jacket and throw it on the couch. I can’t wait any longer. I saunter over to him, wine bottle in hand and give him my sauciest smile.

“Do you want to drink the wine now or later?” I hold up the bottle.

I can see the desire dancing around in his eyes, in the set of his jaw. He doesn’t want to wait anymore than I do.

“I think it can wait.” He drawls. “Here, let me put it in the fridge.”

I hand it over and he puts it away. He comes back into the tiny living space and looks down at me, he’s at least a head taller than me. I’m not short either.

“You are one of the hottest girls I’ve ever come across.” He says brushing a strand of hair away from my face.

“Not surprising.” I say. “I am from Philly after all. All the hot girls are raised in Philly.”

“Obviously.” He says before kissing me.

His lips are cool, like a kiss from winter itself. I press my body against his, as close as possible so that no space can come between us. We don’t need thoughts or love to enjoy this. Just raw desire and attraction. We need each other. That is all that this act requires.

We move our fun over to the couch where I straddle his lap. He plants a series of kisses along my collar bone, making me shudder with delight. I hook my arms around his neck and press my chest into his face. He is everything I never thought I’d want. Which I why I think this is so satisfying. Surprises are the most fun.

Our bodies press against each other and its hard determining who is enjoying themselves more. We can’t get enough of each other. Both of us are desperate. For sex, for touch and maybe only we can give that to each other, in this moment in time at least.

I take my top of and fling it, I think it might land on top of the television. I grin and take his face in my hands, kissing him so hard I know my lips will be bruised for days.

In a matter of moments were are nothing but skin, our breathing becoming shallow and harsh, like our lungs can’t quite keep up with our desire.

I do not think of Isaac. I do not think of Natalie. I’m not sure I even think of me.

After we’re finished we fall against each other, both gasping. I press my head onto his chest and let myself relish this moment. I will never have sex with him again for the first time. I have to cherish this. Because sex for the first time with someone is always more exciting, more nerve racking and therefore better. Perhaps the best.

Once I’m done taking in the moment I roll off of the beautiful, green eyed boy and laugh. “Wow.”

“Wow indeed.” He murmurs.

“I’m not just a pretty face.” I say opening the box of donuts in front of us.

“How are you single? I mean, if I were the relationship type I’d never let you go just because…you’re really good at-“

“Sex?”

“Sex.”

 “Why thank you.” I say taking a bite of the delish glazed treat which might be better than even the best sex. Food is better than most things though. It will fill a hole in you like nothing else.

“And then a minute later you start eating a god damn donut.” He chuckles. “You’re perfect.”

“Far from it.” I say. “But I do admit to being both good at sex and eating.”

“That is the definition of perfect.” He says.

“Shut up and eat a donut.”

“I’d prefer some wine.” He says getting up, stark naked and walking to the fridge. “Want some?”

“I’ll pass. Booze after sex always makes me feel gross.” I admit taking another huge bite of my donut. “Like I’m in a bad feminist novel where the protagonist is finally experiencing the fruits of the flesh.”

James laughs heartily. “You’re odd.”

“And proud.” I call back.

I take his t-shirt and throw it on. I’m not comfortable enough around him or in my body to sit totally naked for who knows how long. He comes back with the wine and his phone. “I don’t have any jazz music on here but I do have some classic rock.”

I sigh, pretending to be miffed. “That will work I suppose. Mind if I have another donut?”

“Go for it.” He says popping open the wine. “Sure you don’t want any?”

“I’m sure.” I say reaching for my second donut.

He puts on his underpants, boxers, and puts his phone in an iPod dock. A vaguely familiar female voice begins singing about a guy that cheated on her with his first girlfriend.

We sit in silence. Me eating donuts, him drinking wine straight from the bottle. I don’t think I’ve ever had such a perfect after sex moment.

A/N Thanks for reading :) and remember to vote and comment!! P.s before you get miffed at the sex etc (not that anyone has but I am super worried someone will haha) I warned you this wasn't a story for youngins.