(Completed) Mr. Kim

19 Nineteen

"Fuck." My most favorite word of the day.
My head was buried under my pillow, my eyes closed as I felt the weight on my eyelids, telling me to sleep.

I refused, knowing what was to come as soon as I tried to go into a sleepless state.
I'm slowly breaking, and I have no idea what to do.

Last time I did was a while back, when I still had her, but she's gone now.
She's gone and she's never coming back.
Just thinking about her merciless death has me balling my hands into fists, fighting the tears that wanted to fall.

Do. Not. Be. Weak. Ever.
Never, never be weak.

I continue to ignore the knocks on the front door of my dorm from the outside of my bedroom, not caring at all how Sana even knew what dorm to check.

I haven't been to school in two days, those days being the first that I've ever skipped, not counting the countless times I've gotten kicked out.

This being the third day, I was planning on going, but Sana ruined my mood.
I absolutely did not want to talk to her, nor to Taehyung.

Just the thought of him made me angry.
How could he fucking try that on me!
That bastard.
I sighed, opening my eyes and lifting my pillow from my hair and face.

With my eyes casted down, I sat upright on my bed, putting my hands on my face.
I knew deep down Taehyung did absolutely nothing, that it was just my imagination, a recreation of my childhood memories.

I really only needed a reason to push him away, knowing damn well he was doing something to me that I absolutely hated.

"Open up Jungkook!! I'm not going to keep doing this anymore! I know you're mad!! I'm sorry for doing that and making you uncomfortable. I'm sorry that I don't have any personally boundaries! I'll try to work on that, please don't stop being my friend! You're the only one I have!! I don't want to be left alone..."

I opened the door, a random shirt on my chest while I had on woman's pajama shorts.
So what it ended at the damn fucking bottom of my ass?
They're comfortable.

My hair was a mess. Unwashed and unkept, a masked emotionless expression on my face as I stared at her, my eyes widening as I realize that she's close to tears.

"Oh Jungkook I'm-"
"It's not your fault. Yes I'm mad that you did that. I'm not forgiving you for that, even after I told you to not intervene. It's not all your fault. It's mostly on my part, and my own emotions. I'm not going to stop being friends with you just because you made one mistake. We barely know each other, so we're obviously going to make mistakes. I'm also sorry I kinda cut you off."

She looked at me.
I watched as a wide smile played at her lips, getting wider and wider until her eyes closed tightly, her other features being blinded as she smiled her widest.

"You just said that we're friends. You officially said, that we're friends."
My expression turned to shock.
I was so vowed on not making any friends....

"You don't know how happy that makes me."

My eyes land on her, slightly smiling as I watch her have a happy expression. It quickly turned into a frown, my eyes landing on my feet.

I wish I could feel happy like she just did, except, all the time.

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Lynn~~