my brother's friend; kv

chapter 35

jeongguk doesn't know what to do.

hopelessley he's walking through random streets while it's being dark, trying to ignore the pain in his face. he doesn't think his face has ever been bruised like this before.

he seriously doesn't know what to do.

of course he thought about going to taehyung because there's no place he'd rather be at right now, but he can't, knowing that he would worry and ask him questions.

but... he wants to see him so bad. he wants to tell him everything and he wants... no needs taehyung's comfort.

but he doesn't want taehyung to know under which circumstances he lives, it's embarrassing. also if they were dating, taehyung's parents would want to know more about jeongguk's family and get to know them. he can't let that happen since his family is a shame and the only thing you can do is to pity them while also being disgusted of them.

taehyung comes from a rich family and jeongguk is nothing. he has nothing. and there's nothing he can give taehyung. he can't take him to expensive restaurants, he can't buy him his favorite (also expensive) clothes. he is just not good enough for him and he's also sure that taehyung's parents would see that and not want someone like him as their son in law.

jeongguk must be walking for one hour now and suddenly he feels his legs giving up, falling to the ground.

"fuck.", he curses, not knowing what to do. the rain starts pouring as he's on the ground, his knees hurting from the roughness of the cold street.

jeongguk is tired.

tired of everything.

tired of being abused, tired of his mother not caring about him, tired of going to work and earn money just so they can spend it on alcohol and drugs, tired of pushing his friends away so they won't see his bruised face, tired of hiding his pain, tired of... pushing taehyung away... the only person he started to love with all of his heart. the person he needs the most in times like this. the person whose smile he wants to see all the time. he's tired of thinking he's not good enough. he's tired of everything.

does jeongguk not deserve to be happy?

"dad.", he starts crying.

"can you hear me?"

he feels stupid for doing what he's doing right now but at the same time he couldn't care less.

"c-can you see me?", he asks, looking up to the sky.

"i don't know what to do dad.. since you left.. everything has become so bad.", he chokes out another cry as he's trying to swallow it.

"i don't even know what i'm doing here.", he chuckles.

"you know what dad? i fell in love.", he chuckles again.

"for the first time i fell in love. and he's beautiful.. he's so perfect, you would love him. but i don't deserve him dad..."

"i don't deserve him because..."

again he wants to say because of his "parents" but something stops him from doing so.. his own realization does.

he has a big frown on his face. i'm scared of dating taehyung.. because of... them? because of the two shitbags sitting in my house right now? because of them i would let taehyung go, watching how he one day meets someone else.. probably marrying him.. just because i don't allow myself to be happy because of these two digusting shit people? no.

hell no.

"dad.. i am enough.. because you know what? because i'm your son. and you taught me how to be a good person and that's why i'm good enough. i'm going.. i'm going to him now. thank you dad. i love you.", he says and he'd look crazy to others, sitting on the ground and talking to the sky. but he doesn't care. he quickly gets up to walk or more like run to taehyung's house. he can't help but to start laughing while doing so.

~

"jeongu- oh my god!", he almost screams.

"tae.", jeongguk says his lip trembling as taehyung quicky pulls him into a hug.

"tae.. i love you.", jeongguk cries and taehyung's eyes are wide, not understanding what's happening right now.

"so much. i'm sorry.", jeongguk cries and taehyung can't believe what's going on.

"tae? oh my god.", namjoon comes to the corridor, seeing jeongguk in taehyung's arms crying.

"what happened?", he asks but no one answers. the only thing can be heard is jeongguk sobbing. taehyung struggles with standing still, since jeongguk is really heavy to him and basically just lets himself fall now and if taehyung let him go he would immediately fall to the ground.

"gguk, get up please, let's go to my room.", taehyung says with a shaking voice and namjoon quickly comes closer to support jeongguk from one side and taehyung supports him from the other side and together they're walking to taehyung's room. jeongguk ran all the way to taehyung's house that's why also the last strength he had in his body left him.

they lay jeongguk down on taehyung's bed.

"i'm calling jin.", namjoon says and leaves the room, not without closing the door.

taehyung quickly starts hugging jeongguk, also starting to cry.

"i'm here for you.. you're not alone.", he says, wanting jeongguk to know that he'll always be here for him.

as jeongguk's laying on his back taehyung sits on the bed, now looking into his face which is so badly bruised taehyung could start crying again.

"who did that to your handsome face?", he asks, gently removing a strand from his face.

"i love you.", he hears again and he just looks at jeongguk for a couple seconds, before he chuckles and tears leave his eyes.

"i love you too.", taehyung says and he notices how jeongguk kinda stretches his arms out for him that's why taehyung leans his back against the wall behind him and pulls jeongguk close.

jeongguk starts hugging taehyung's belly and rests his head on his chest. taehyung has his arms wrapped around him as he rests his chin on top of jeongguk's head and also starts stroking his hair.

"i'll tell you everything.", jeongguk says. taehyung feels happy that he finally trusts him enough.

"it's okay, rest first. i love you.", taehyung again says and jeongguk could never ever put into words how happy it makes him.