Ever Since New York // H.S. - ON HOLD

CHAPTER 1 - EVELYN MAE WINTERS

A/N - This is the aesthetic Evelyn has right now. I didn't cast her as a specific person mostly because I couldn't find someone who fit exactly how I envisioned, but also because I want to leave some of it up to the reader's imagination!

. . . 

"Ginny, sweetie, we need to get going!" I call out, knowing she's lallygagging in the living room so she doesn't have to put her shoes on. Normally I don't bring her to my appointments, but my nanny wasn't available this morning. This just means I had to be sure to pack an array of books and toys for her to occupy herself with for an hour.

"I's coming, Mommy!" I hear the sound of her toys clunking on the coffee table come to a halt as she comes running to the front hall where I am waiting with her shoes. I dressed her in a simple pair of leggings and a sweater, knowing she always gets cold. She's wearing real panties today, so I just pray to god she doesn't have an accident. I made her go twice already, so I am hoping that will hold her over until we get to the office.

Slipping the tiny pair of vans on her feet, I swing both my purse and her backpack over my shoulders. I grab my keys and Ginny's hand as I lead us out the door and toward the parking lot of our condo. Glancing at my watch as we reach the car, I sigh in relief knowing we made it out the door in time. Usually, Ginny gives me the hardest time when getting out the door unless it's somewhere like the park or for food. She can be so stubborn and I have no one to blame except for myself because I know she got it all from me.

I place our bags in the backseat opposite of Ginny's car seat. Hoisting her up by her armpits, I strap her in, making sure everything is buckled firmly and in the right position. I recently transitioned her to front sitting with a new car seat, and although I know she is getting bigger, I fear she will mess with the buckles and cause havoc while I am driving.

Whilst pulling out of the parking lot, I flip the radio on, knowing that is one of the only things that keeps Ginny calm during car rides. She is not very fond of the car, but I am not quite sure where her anxiety of it comes from. I absolutely love driving. It calms me down and allows me to clear my head. There were many nights when I was pregnant with her that I would just drive for hours until my tank ran low simply because I could, but also because it gave me an escape from the hell that I was living.

The radio host finishes speaking and I roll the windows down a bit as a new song begins to play. Looking into the rearview mirror, I can't help but smile a little bit because Ginny is quite possibly the cutest thing ever. She has a mock pair of raybans on which are a little too big for her, so she keeps pushing them up the bridge of her nose. Her curly, bleach blonde hair flows carelessly in the wind and she looks so happy as she's humming along to one of her favorite songs lately.

Watermelon Sugar by Harry Styles.

Yep. My daughter is a Harry Styles fan. Who would have thunk?

Despite the fact that I am around celebrities, talking to them, and writing stories about them weekly, I am not very fond of them. Sure, there are some kind ones, but living in the lime-light just isn't my style. Yet somehow, I live in LA where it seems like everyone is trying to be the next "instagram influencer". I mainly keep to myself. I go where I need to go. See who I need to see. Talk to who I need to talk to. But nothing more than that really. Just because I spend my days writing about celebrities' lives, does not mean that I am anything like them.

It only takes us about 15 minutes to get there, which is surprising given the nasty LA traffic that normally occurs. We park in the garage and ride the elevator up to Dr. Murphy's office. She's been my psychiatrist ever since I moved here a little over 3 years ago. My brother, Jonah, was the one who convinced me to start seeing someone because he wanted me to stay on top of caring for myself. I was already at rock-bottom, but I knew I couldn't stay there. I had Ginny to think about, and I needed to get better for her sake.