Honest Goodbye [COMPLETED] #Wattys2020

Chapter 18

Chapter 18

He's still crying. There's a tremor on how he said sorry.

My sight—it became blurry. Hindi ko alam kung tama ba ang ginagawa namin sa mismong kasal pa ni Pola.

"Max." I trembled saying his name, all this time, ngayon lang ako nagkaroon ng lakas ng loob na sabihin ang pangalan niya.

"I don't want this anymore." his voice slices through my memory. Sa lahat ng pagkakataon, ngayon pa sumagi sa isip ko ang sinabi niya sa akin bago siya umalis.

He didn't move his gaze from me. "I'm sorry, Eyv." I heard a slow shriek from his voice. "I really didn't stop loving you." he continued.

Hindi ko alam kung bakit ako ganito. I didn't intend to cry. Hindi ko alam, naguguluhan na ako.

Bakit pa kailangan mangyari 'to? I already said yes to Marcus. He invited me at the back of the church earlier, sinagot ko na siya. Bakit ngayon pa, Max?

I slapped my chest. Kasalanan niya 'to. My heart is the reason for all of this. Dahil sa kaniya, nasasaktan ako ngayon. I went to anywhere I could go, I did everything to move on, akala ko okay na ako, pero bakit ganito ang nararamdaman ko ngayon?

Hindi ko alam.

Nakaluhod pa rin siya ngayon at inaabot ang bulaklak na kanina pa niya hawak. Wala akong naririnig na kahit anong salita. Siya lang ang nakikita ko ngayon.

Another tear broke out from his eyes. I really can see the pain in them.

I was going to slap my chest again but someone grabbed it. He grabbed my hand as he exits the door of the rooftop. No one dared to stop him.

"M-Mat" I called his name. Naglalakad pa rin siya habang hila-hila ang kamay ko.

Hinila niya ako hanggang makababa kami ng rooftop, hindi ko alam kung pang-ilang floor ang tinatapakan namin ngayon.

All I know is that tears are keep flowing down from my eyes.

Binitawan niya ang kamay ko at naglakad patungo sa dulo ng hallway na kung nasaan kami ngayon, it's a balcony, every corner of a hallway has its own balcony.

Hindi pa rin nawawala sa isip ko ang nangyari kanina. Wala akong ideya kung ano na ang nangyayari ngayon sa rooftop.

I just followed him until we reached the balcony. Tumigil na rin ang mga luha, at natuyo na ang luhang kanina ay nasa mukha ko, dala ng lakas ng simoy ng hangin mula sa kinatatayuan namin.

My brain whirled back to life as Mat speaks, "It's okay.." he faced me and I saw his lips moved upward, "don't think about it anymore."

I was about to open my mouth to apologize on how I reacted on the situation but his lips exhaled first, "Let's not talk about that anymore."

Tumingin siya sa ibaba. I just followed the direction of his eyes. Nakakalula ang daan mula rito. "Are you not mad on how I reacted?" hindi ko mapigilang mapatanong sa kaniya.

He leaned on me, "Why would I?" he smiled.

Ilang minuto kaming nakatayo ni Mat dito hanggang magyaya siya na ihatid na raw ako. Siya kasi ang nagsundo sa akin papunta sa simbahan kaya't wala akong dalang sasakyan.

He didn't say anything hanggang maka-uwi na ako. He is just focused on driving. Only the music gave life to our atmosphere.

Tonight, hindi ko alam kung makakatulog ba ako ng mahimbing. I turned off my phone. I don't want the incident to get lured in my head anymore.