Hiraya

Chapter 06

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Nang makarating ako sa kwarto, naghahanda na sila para matulog. Yung iba nagcocomplain na mainit na daw, which is true though. Di pinagamit yung aircon e. I went straightly to my bed para kuhain ang toothbrush,toothpaste at sabon ko. After that, pumunta na ako sa restroom para maghilamos at mag-toothbrush.

" Mace. Saan ka galing?" tanong ni Louie

" Kinausap ko lang si Ken dun" pagsagot ko naman

Nilabas ni Louie ang mga snacks nya. Fieldtrip na ata ang pupuntahan ni Louie sa sobrang dami ng dala nya. She had some biscuits, chips and even chocolates! Gusto ko pa sanang kumain kaso nakapag-toothbrush na ako. Kaya naman nanahimik nalang ako sa kama ko at sinubukang matulog. Pero medyo maingay kami dahil nagkakatakutan, common retreat happenings.

" Wala nalang magbubukas ng ilaw at pinto sa cr! Please lang!" sigaw ni Allieson na halatang takot.

" Patay nalang natin ilaw din dito sa kwarto!" sigaw naman ni Aubrey, " Oo okay na yun!" pagsang-ayon ko naman dahil legit gurl, mainit.

I volunteered na ako nalang magpapatay ng ilaw. At nang mapatay ko na, may mga katok ng katok pero pag tinatanong namin kung sino 'di naman sumasagot. Funny sila 'no? At dahil don, nagpabalik-balik pa tuloy ako sa switch ng ilaw.

It was already 11:30 at konti nalang kaming gising, 4 nalang kaming gising nila Allieson habang nagkekwentuhan about life. After a few minutes, 2 nalang kami ni Allieson na gising.

' Dai labas tayo? Nauuhaw ako! Wala na tayong tubig dito" pagsabi nya sakin habang tumatayo na

" Sige dai, nauuhaw din ako" pagsagot ko naman sakanya.

We went out and saw some people na gising pa, baka nainitan din. Even those students na ka-share namin sa bungalow nasa labas pa, yung iba dun na ata matutulog.

Pumunta kami ni Allieson sa chapel or sa labas ng chapel to be exact para kumuha ng tubig sa water dispenser don, kaso pagkapunta namin dun wala nang tubig. We made our way pabalik sa kwarto para naman pilitin matulog dahil medyo malamig na din naman.

Pero pagkadating namin sa kwarto, di pa din talaga ako inaantok. I told Allieson na magpapahangin lang ako and she nodded as she lay down to her bed.

I went out to get some fresh air, yung mga tao kanina dito sa labas tulog na. Madilim na din pero I sat on a bench sa labas ng kwarto namin. I could see the sky from here and I can't help but to gaze at it admiring how beautiful it is. Hindi dapat ako nagpupuyat dahil maaga daw ang exercise bukas, kaya naman nagpapa-antok nalang ako.

As I gaze at the sky, I can't help but to think again.I was having my own what if's and replaying memories where I made some wrong decisions, and think about how's my life going lately. I just wanted to focus on myself this time, gusto ko wala munang eepal. Though I was crushing on Riley, I still wanted to focus on myself. Riley was just a happy crush. No big deal. I was so proud of myself for being able to heal.

" Bakit kaya tuwing okay ka na, may eepal na naman sa buhay mo no?" I said out of the blue

I am really curious about that one though. Alam mo yun kapag okay na ako biglang may makikilala na naman ako and as day goes by, I am being attached to them and then one day they'll just simply leave like nothing happened. That was exhausting. Alam kong may fault din ako pero I don't know, maybe just maybe may mga bagay na hindi ko kayang mabigay. I wish I could figure out that one.

" I'm so proud of you Maia, I hope you'll find your happiness soonest. I hope you'll be genuinely happy soon." I said again to myself, convincing that everything will get better, soon.