A Spider's Web ll Natasha Romanoff

Angel of Death

It was about 2 o'clock in the morning when I arrived back at the hotel, distraught. Once I walked into the room, I slammed the door shut, wincing when the bang echoed throughout the room. I stood still for a few moments, listening for any indication that I woke Natasha up, if she was even sleeping.

I didn't pick up any noises and let out a breath of relief. Walking to the fridge, I grabbed one of the bottles of wine I had stored and made my way over towards the balcony. Walking out onto the balcony, I shut the glass sliding door, this time silently, and sat down on one of the two seats.

I opened the bottle and gazed into the night. The stars were shining and lit up the sky, while the lamp posts were lighting up the streets. It was silent. No noises whatsoever were made and the cool night air danced across my face.

I opened the bottle of wine and poured a glass for myself and immediately brought it to my lips once I was done pouring it. This mission was testing me in ways that I wasn't prepared for. I couldn't tell whether it was for better or worse.

The sound of the sliding door behind me jolted me from my thoughts. I turned around and saw Natasha gently closing the door with her back towards me. She turned around and walked to the seat beside me and sat down.

She was in a black tank top and black pajama pants. Once she was comfortable, she tucked her legs up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. She didn't look at me. She stared out into the night, while I stared at her. Her hair was blowing slightly from the wind.

"It's peaceful out here." She started.

"Yeah." I agreed, looking away from her and to the twinkling sky.

"Do you want to talk about it?" She asked.

I hesitated. No. I didn't want to talk about it. I wanted to keep it to myself. I am the only one that could help me. Truthfully, I didn't know how I was feeling - other than conflicted. I stayed silent and she did too.

"I killed a man tonight." I admitted.

She looked at me, no emotion on her face. "Did you want to?"

"No. He ordered me to. To prove my loyalty. The man was the one who shot me in the first place." I tried to justify.

"Did you want revenge?"

"No. It was just part of the job."

"Then why are you distraught if it was part of the mission?"

"Because I liked it." I revealed, turning to her sharply. "I liked killing him. And that scares me."

She stayed silent, unsure of how to respond.

"I'm scared. I don't want to go back to the way I was. Killing for enjoyment. That's not who I am anymore and that's not who I want to be. I'm scared that if I continue this mission, it's going to change me in a way that I won't come back from." I said. I took a deep breath, trying to calm myself. I poured more wine into my glass and drank it.

"You need to keep a clear head. Stop thinking about the maybes. It's not going to make anything better." She scolded, facing me.

"Natasha, I don't want to do this anymore." I said.

"You have to. You're already too deep." She responded.

"I know. I just want to complain." I laughed, hiding how defeated I felt.

Natasha grabbed the bottle of wine and drank from the bottle.

"Hey! That's mine." I whined. "I thought you didn't want any wine!"

"I didn't say I didn't want any. I said we needed to focus on the mission." She retorted.

I hummed in response and took a sip of my wine, hiding a smile.

"I guess you have a point."

"Of course I do." She said, drinking from the bottle again.

"Thank you for listening." I said.

"You're welcome." She said, looking at me. My heart raced as I stared back at her.

"We should head to bed." She said, getting up. My hand shot out before I could think. I grabbed her wrist, before she could walk off.

"Wait." I said. Heat rose to my cheeks. "Will you stay a little longer?"

"No."

I blinked my eyes in surprise. "Oh." I lowered my head. "Okay."

"We should go to sleep. It's going to be a long next couple of weeks." She explained.

"Right. Goodnight then." I said, releasing her wrist and I grabbed the wine glass again. I made no move to get up. She turned to me to see if I would follow her, but walked inside when she realized I had no intention of retiring for the night.

I let out a disappointed sigh and poured more wine into my glass. What was I thinking? Natasha was a tough nut to crack. Why would I think any differently? What made me ask her to stay when I knew she wouldn't?

I stayed outside for another forty-five minutes before I grabbed the now empty bottle and wine glass and walked inside. I threw the bottle out and placed the glass in the sink before heading to the bedrooms.

Right before I walked into my room, I opened Natasha's door to see her sleeping in her bed.

"Natasha." I whispered. "Are you up?"

I didn't receive a response, so I walked in further to the side of the bed. I watched her for a moment and then brushed a stray hair away from her face.

She looked innocent while she slept. She looked like an angel.

An angel of death.

I cringed, pulling my hand away quickly.

Oh my gosh, I'm so creepy. What the hell am I doing?

I walked out of the room quickly and shut the door before walking into my room and jumping under the covers of my bed. I pulled the covers up to my chin and closed my eyes, willing myself to fall asleep and wash away this day.

What I didn't know was that the angel of death was still awake and touching the spot where my fingers grazed.