You lay in bed reading a book when you hear a light knock at the door. Jaden creeps in without a word and sits at the edge of your bed
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Y/N: *after a few awkward moments of silence* “Jaden? What’s the matter? What are you doing in here?”
J: “So you and Bryce huh?”
Y/N: “Bryce and I are friends right now”
J: “Friends who are hooking up?”
Y/N: “Bryce is there for me and it is nice having someone I can count on”
J: “And you couldn’t count on me….”
Y/N: “Jaden don’t do this… I told you I forgave you”
J: “In high school there was this girl…. We were best friends for years and she helped me through a lot of bullying I was getting for loving to sing. Then one day she kissed me. That night a horrible post was made on my social media like saying really awful things…”
Y/N: *reaching out to touch his hand* “Jaden, I’m so sorry….”
J: *continuing* “but also some really personal things…it was her”
His eyes start to fill with tears waiting to spill over
J: “I guess people saw her kiss me and made fun of her and she told them it was just a dare so they dared her to post hate on my profile… Everyone tells you how hard heartbreak is… but losing your only friend is a different…..”
Y/N: *interrupting* “Jaden, I totally understand and I don’t want to lose you as a friend either so let’s work on being friends”
Jaden can tell you misunderstood where he was going with that and loses his nerve to correct you and falls into the habit he is used to and grabs your face and kisses you
Y/N: *pulls away* “Jaden what are you doing?”
J: “Please…”
You had already lost control of your ability to say no to that boy the moment he got in your car the day you met. When you don’t object, Jaden returns his lips to yours and pushes them open with his tongue. As the kiss deepens he leans back pulling you on top of him. He rolls you over and as he hovers above you stops inches from your lips and whispers
J: “Say it…”
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Y/N: “Jaden… don’t do that”
J: *kissing up your neck, he reaches your ear and whispers* “Say it”
Y/N: “I can’t…”
J: *pulls away and looks in shock* “You don’t love me anymore do you….”
Y/N: *Grabbing his arm to pull him back* “Don’t say that”
J: *he chokes on the words* “Is it because of him?”
Y/N: “Not at all… I don’t know what is happening with Bryce. I don’t know how I feel or what I want. All I know is not being loved by you hurts too much to keep pretending it doesn’t”
Jaden leans to kiss you again and you pull away
Y/N: “Jaden stop… can you stop for just a second and have a real conversation about this”
J: “Kiss me…”
Y/N: “Jaden… I’m serious”
J: “I miss you.. is that what you want to hear? I miss you so much I can’t breath and every bit of this is breaking my heart and I can’t even blame anyone but myself but it doesn’t change the fact that I just miss you and I want you and I…”
Y/N: “You what Jaden?”
J: *now with tears streaming down his face* “Please… please…”
*kissing you again* “Please…”
You can’t take one more second of seeing the heartbreak on the boy you love’s face so you reach up to wipe the tear off his cheek. You let your hand glide behind his neck to pull him back to your lips. You break the kiss long enough to pull your shirt over your head and throw it to the floor
You push him back and sit in his lap holding him so close to you that you can feel the movement of his chest as he inhales against your skin. You have missed the feeling of his skin against yours so much more than you let yourself contemplate
Each kiss grows more urgent until you sigh “God I love you… I do”
When Jaden hears those words he had been needing so badly he rolls you over and shows you a love he can’t bring himself to say outloud. You lay intertwined for a while with only the sounds of both your breathing until you finally break the silence
Y/N: “Jaden…”
J: “Yes baby?”
Y/N: “I think you should go back to your room before someone sees you in here”
J: *sits up* “You don’t want Bryce to see me in here.. Is that what it is?”
Y/N: “No… I don’t because I think it would hurt him even though him and I aren’t together, but also because I can’t just go back to how things were”
J: “Why…”
Y/N: “I can’t be Mads… I know you two have a bond and it works for you two or doesn’t… I don’t even know anymore... but it doesn’t work for me."
J: “What are you saying?”
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Y/N: “I don’t think we should do this again… because sleeping with someone who doesn’t love me back makes me feel just awful”
The guilt of knowing you feel awful about something that was the happiest moment of his life breaks his heart and he pulls his shirt over his head and kisses you on the lips one last time and walks out…
