The Other Half of My Heart

Chapter Seven: Regret and Boys

Chapter Seven: Regret and Boys

I sighed to myself as I stared at the wall.  The sigh was a deep and sorrowful sigh.  A sigh that is often used when a person regrets doing something that they did and they wish that they could change it. The change could be something that was mean that they did to someone else, or it could simply be a regret of saying or texting something.

I regretted texting Brian, and saying that I loved him. With the hurt that had been coursing through my veins as I typed the letters, 'I   L-O-V-E   Y-O-U', I felt scared and skittish.  Regret pounded in my heart.  I felt hot and dizzy.

Tears sprang to my eyes, as I remembered that nobody loved me.  I dressed carefully, putting on black skinny jeans, black fingerless gloves, black tank top, and black knee high converse shoes, black resembled my feelings, and my feelings were that everyone hated me.

Sweating, I began my way down the stairs.  The iron railing was cool on my skin as I used it to support myself.  Each step was an effort.  I swayed horribly. Spots appeared before my eyes. Dizzy, I ignored breakfast, and stumbled out of the door.

The bus wasn't that far away. My stomach churned and twisted. I did not feel good, but I headed towards the yellow blob that was the bus. My feet were heavy as I lifted each one and stepped up, and up. 

Thud, thud, thud went my feet, as I walked past the door, I started to fall. Strong, warm hands caught me.  "Thank you, Sam." I mumbled before both puking and blacking out.

***

I woke up in the nurse's office.   

"Oh, she's fine, she skipped breakfast and I sense some drama has occurred in her life recently," I heard the nurse say to a guy who looked very nervous.  

I squinted my eyes and gasped, "Brian?!" 

"Tasha!" He exclaimed.  "You'e okay!" 

I stood up, and slapped him as hard as I could right across the face. "Go away!"

He looked stunned that I had slapped him.  "Why?" he asked me.  "Thought that you loved me!" 

"Well, that's what you get for thinking!" I exclaimed.

He tried to touch my shoulder, but I slapped him again, "Get your dirty hands off me!" I yelled, wondering what the nurse thought. My thoughts pumped through my mind and a headache started to form.  "Oh, ow." I mumbled, blacking out again.

*****

My head pounded horribly as I lay on the nurse's table. It was dark. The table was squishy and comfortable. My head hurt terribly bad.  

I lifted my arm and touched my finger to my forehead. Oh ow. My arm was sore, but my head had a large bump on it. My forehead now had a huge lump.  

I imagined Brian or Sam seeing me now. "Ew, she's ugly." they would say. "LOOK at her head!"  

My eyes watered with pain. What the heck had I done to myself? Oh it hurt terribly bad. Tears of hurt dripped down my cheekbone and onto the table.  

I could hear each one land, although it was barely audible. 'drip.' it was a small noise. The tears leaked out of my eyes and I listened to them fall.  

This was not a sad cry. It was more of a I'm-in-pain-because-I-hit-my-forehead kind of cry. It was strangely soothing, crying like this.  

I wondered if my mascara was running. With my luck it was all around my eyes. I wiped my cheeks and felt a sort of grainy texture. Yes, yes, my mascara was in fact, running.  

I groaned to myself.  

Then a thought occurred to me. Where was my backpack? The thing that weighed a ton, I had remembered to grab it, right? No! I forgot it at home! All of my homework was in there! I was going to have detention unless the nurse had a really good excuse up her sleeve.  

Someone opened the door and flicked on the light. I flung my hands over my eyes, ignoring the soreness of my arms. Despite my effort to protect myself from the light, light still got through and I squinted.  

"Are you okay?" I heard someone say.  

"Y-yes." I said, "But I look hideous." 

Someone dimmed the lights slightly, and walked over to me. I felt myself being lifted up and placed on someone's lap. I lay against whoever's it was chest.  

I knew only that this person was male. The voice was too deep to be a girls voice. I took my hands from my eyes and placed them on his chest. I squinted. "Sam?" 

"Yeah," he said. "It's me, it's gonna be all right, and you look pretty as ever."  

I fumbled for something to say, but came up with nothing.  

"Can I ask you a question?" he asked.  

"Yes, or course, anything." I replied hastily, turning slightly red.  

Oh what I sight this must be. Me with a huge bump on my head, mascara all around my eyes, and very red. Yeah, not exactly pretty.  

He flashed me a cute grin, "Well, I just wanted to know," He paused 

My mind raced WHAT DID HE WANT TO KNOW?! 

"Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?" 

"Uh..." I was speechless for a second. "Well I suppose not because then I met you." I finally said.  

"No!" his eyes bugged. "I lost something!"  

"What? I'll help you find it!" I offered quickly. He really was being sweet.  

He remained silent.  

"What is it?" I repeated.  

"My heart," he replied quietly, "because you stole it." 

After that we just sat there for a while. We stared out the window.  

His chest moved slightly as he breathed in and out. I cuddled with him. It was gorgeous outside. The sun was setting, casting pinks and oranges and purples all over. It looked so pretty. "It's so pretty..." I murmured.  

"Not half as pretty as you." he said.  

A smile lit up my face.  

"Oh Sam. You always make me smile..." I said.  

"Well its always amazing to make a girl as beautiful as you smile." he commented.  

My smile stayed there for a long while. I couldn't feel more loved than I did right now.  

Maybe my soul wasn't that broken anymore.... That's what I thought, until someone threw open the door and said, "She loves ME not YOU! Back off, NOW!"