Intoxicating [VMinkook]

Sixty Two

Castle of Glass - Linkin Park

Warning:
Self Harm

Shattered.

Everything is shattered.

Plates, vases, lamp posts, a table flipped over, maybe there's a hole on the wall too.

Everything is just a disaster.....

Trashed.

The entire dorm is a mess, only filled with the pleading sobs of a broken boy on the floor of the kitchen.

Leaning back against the cabinets, sitting on the floor with knees to his chest is Taehyung. His hands are bloody, probably from the aggressive punch on the wall from earlier. Tears after tears stream down his blotchy cheeks, hiccuping and wheezing the pain and blank spaces in his mind.

He feels like he's losing his sanity.

This guilt for what happened to Minho, the texts with his friends, so many moments he can't fucking remember yet his body caused.

What that alter has caused....

Whatever everyone thinks he caused.

Gripping his blonde hair now, he bangs his head back against the wooden cabinet, sobbing hard with a eyes squeezed shut.

He's so tired.

So tired of not remembering.

So tired of having to explain himself. And to think that he can't even open up about it because it's just not something so easy to come out and say it.

It took a while to finally tell Minho, and Karma doesn't trust so easily. V is more so insecure to say anything so that won't happen.

There's been various of times where Taehyung almost said it, but that's when another alter would come and handle the situation.

This hole inside his heart isn't the first time he's feeling it. He's felt it always. Trauma after trauma that he can't even fucking look back and remember, only a few that he can grasp but the rest are just holes.

That he can't fill in.

No matter how hard he's tried.

"I can't continue to live like this!" Taehyung wheezes against his shakily palms, choking in his sobs as he did so, "I can't."

Suddenly his consciousness began to slowly fade, recognizing that familiar feeling almost as though he's being swallowed, disconnecting with reality. He shakes his head viciously, gripping his hair tighter in hopes he can stay longer.

But his consciousness falls black.

And a new one is in control.

The face of the body falls serious, completely serious, the tears of the once crying boy still streaming down the cheeks but broken eyes now filled with an emotionless stare.

For a long moment the body stays seated on the floor, not feeling or doing anything in particular, but then it suddenly reached to a drawer and yanks it open, pulling out a butcher knife.

The weapon or pretty blade bounces between their hands like a pretty toy, a small smile tugging their lips before it slowly turns to a mean scowl upon facing their reflection.

Sleeves of the shirt Taehyung was wearing rises up, revealing his smooth skin on his arm.

The knife bounces on the skin lightly like the way it did between their hands, almost playfully and innocent.

"You feel too much, too curious," Cold lips murmurs, pressing the knife down harder to the skin, "Don't do it again."

And the knife glides against the skin, just near the elbow. The slice opens the tissues, oozing the scarlet blood from the body out. Another similar slit is made, maybe a bigger one, and another one.

Three to be exact, before the knife is thrown aside, only left with those dark and monotone eyes staring at the wall with the tears drying out against their cheeks.

The present alter slowly sinks back into mind space, awakening Taehyung's blank state of consciousness.

His body is back to rattling feverishly, looking around anxiously to still see he's at the same place.

But his arm stings.....

Reluctantly he looks down.

And he screams.

_________________________
A/N:
Aw Tae :(

So just to say this in advance, I'm not writing the concept of Taehyung's condition so it could be idolize or something one would want to have. This is more to spread awareness and remove stigma in regards to it. I have done research on this, but I'm no professional, if I'm ever incorrect about anything in regards to this please correct me nicely and I will fix it. In that way I can learn more as well!!

Alright let's see what happens at the game!

I PURPLE YOU! <33