Us, Colliding

CHAPTER SIX

I dip my toes into the sea water and am surprised at it's warmth.

"It's gorgeous, right?' Neri says from behind me, 'this part of the bay is a sun trap! Perfect for swimming, sunbathing, kayaking. I love it!'
I turn to face her but she's undressing and I feel uncomfortable so I turn away.

I have a swimsuit under my clothes but I don't feel right undressing in front of Neri - I don't know her and despite her ability to put me at ease, I barely like undressing myself in changing rooms with mirrors, let alone on the middle of a, yes, it's secluded, but it's still a public beach. Someone might see.

Neri darts past me and bombs into the depths of the water, she disappears under the surface for a moment before reappearing, her hair plastered to her head.

"Ahhh, it's gorgeous," she sighs with a smile, treading water, "you coming in?"

I shrug.

"You're kind of wound tight, aren't you?" Neri says with a laugh.

I shrug again.

"And you don't say much. I'm not going to ask you why that is," she says splashing at the water, "you can tell me if you want to, but you should know that if you don't get your ass in here I'm coming for you."

I stare at her indignantly.

"Hey, I'm stronger than I look," Neri wiggles her thick brows.

"I don't have a costume," I lie.

"Sure you do," Neri says, "just get in in your pants and bra - keep your top on if you want, you'll dry in no time, I promise."

I frown.

"You can swim, right?"

I roll my eyes "yes, I can swim."

Barely. My mum never got me lessons growing up so I was the only kid in my class at 12 years old who couldn't swim. I had to stay in the baby pool with a bunch of 7 years olds to learn. I got my 10 meter badge before the shame ate me up and I started skipping any P.E lessons which included swim class.

"Come on then!" Neri calls and she swims gracefully onto her back.

While she's not watching I slip out of my shorts and top. My costume is plain black. I know she'll realise I was lying when she sees it but I'm ok with that.

Once I've discarded my clothes I gingerly walk into the water which is warm but not as warm as the hot air. It feels good.

I slowly walk forward until the water level hits my waist and then I stand there with my eyes closed for a few moments enjoying the feeling of the ocean as it caresses my skin.

"You're super cute," Neri's voice scatters my thoughts.

I open my eyes but feel suddenly disoriented by the moving waves and fall backwards with a splash, my head going below the water.

The panic which seizes me in that moment is overwhelming. I can't be under there for more than 5 seconds but I break the surface and splutter loudly.

Neri is laughing and suddenly I feel kind of angry.

"Hey, are you ok?" She asks in between snorts as I turn and attempt to stomp back to the beach, the uneven sand keeps shifting under my feet and I stumble a few times which annoys me further.

I hate that she's looking at me.
I hate that I'm such an awkward idiot.

"I'm sorry I laughed!" She calls, "honestly! Please don't be mad!"

She sounds kinda sad and I almost feel sorry for her but the feelings of shame at my exposed body, at my very being, are much greater.

"Myra!" She calls, she's following me now but I'm already at the shore.

I snatch up my clothes.

"Please, Myra -" she reaches the beach much more quickly than I do, she pants with the exertion. "Don't go," she reaches me and places a cool hand on my arm. "I'm sorry I laughed."

"It's fine," I say, shrugging on my top which sticks to my wet skin. My skirt feels uncomfortable and digs into my legs and hips.

"I just remembered I have to help my dad with something."

I don't look at her as I march away, but I can see her face in my mind - she looks hurt.

———

"You weren't gone long," a voice calls across the beach as I head back to my father's house. I turn to see Hanu walking towards me.

He's shirtless and his toned olive skin glistens with small droplets of sweat or water, I'm not sure which.

I swallow as I think of what Kelsey and Paula would say if they could see this tall, dark, broad shouldered guy striding toward me.

They wouldn't say anything because they wouldn't be able to pick their jaws up off the floor.

Personally, I've never understood that weird thirst girls my age have for a guys body;
guys are kind of gross, they're either too well groomed and self absorbed or not well groomed enough and also kind of stinky.

Hanu belongs to the first group, I can tell.

As he gets closer he gives me a "melt your insides" kind of smile. I can tell he uses it a lot, probably on girls.

"Hi," I say, I'm still walking but he falls into step next to me and I feel a knot of anxiety pull tighter.

"You have fun?" Hanu asks, "you look kind of... pissed. If you don't mind me saying."

I shrug.

"Listen, can I offer you some advice?" Hanu says, he touches my arm which causes me to stop walking and I cautiously turn to him.

"Neri," he begins, his eyes stare into my own unblinkingly, "that girl, she's..." he pauses, "a lot." He says.

I don't really know what to say. Neri is a lot, she's bubbly and kind of overbearing but she's super friendly.

"I mean, just be careful, ok?"

"Be careful?" I ask, finding my voice.

"Neri has a way of making you feel like the centre of the universe," Hanu says, "she makes you feel good... like the sunshine. Like you've collided with something wonderful, but when she takes it away, you'll feel like you've been in a train wreck."

I frown.

I don't know what to say to him.

I imagine he and Neri used to be together, and they broke up. I think he's warning me against her because he doesn't want her to tell me bad things about him.

I think he has a huge ego.

I don't say any of this though.

"Ok," I reply.

"Ok." He echoes, "so if you want to hang out with us tonight, we're having a cook out on the beach. We can make it something like a welcoming party for you?"

I pull a face.

"Or not!" He holds up his hands in defence and laughs, "we'll just make it a gathering - of friends?"

I nod slowly, "ok then," I say.

"Oh wow, you'll come?" Hanu sounds genuinely happy and I can't help but smile, I look to my feet, nudging the sand with my toes, "yeah I'll come," I say.

Hanu laughs and suddenly pulls me into a hug, "yes!" He says, and I stand there awkwardly, my face sticking to his chest which is gross and I hold my breath.

Not soon enough, he lets me go.

"Meet you here at 7?" He says with a smile.

I nod.

"Awesome," he backs away from me and then gives me a salute which I awkwardly return, "see you later, Myra."

I nod again.

In the distance I see a small, slight figure watching us, they turn and with their head down, walk back the opposite way.