Pure

Chapter Seven - Part Two

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I don’t think I quiet pulled off the landing technique, because when I finally came to, for a second I thought I’d died again because all I could feel was complete agony, but there was absolutely nothing blissful about it.

I couldn’t speak, I couldn’t hear, and for the life of me I couldn’t move.

My skin felt like it had been ripped from my bones, my bones felt like aching, burning bits of charcoal in an incinerator, and my insides, I’d never felt like my own lungs were capable of choking me! And still none of these words could even comprehend the absolute torture I felt at that moment.

The taste of metal and bitterness filled my mouth, which caused me to gasp and cough…very bad idea. As rain washed away the red stuff coming from what I suspected was my mouth, lip, cheek, and most likely many other parts of my body, the left side of my face lay ice cold on the wet cement floor of what must have been the Patrick University court yard.

Using the only body part that still worked to scan my surroundings. I looked up and down, which was really more like side to side, and came across pretty much the only thing I could see through the thick droplets that were determined to blind me.

A beautiful, somewhat dreary, 7 meter 700 year old brick archway standing from one side of the courtyard to the other, there were never-ending built in rows of white pillars on either side of the archway, with high brick ceilings and what looked like huge black drooping flowers attached to each pillar. However after a few strenuous blinks I realized they were indeed hanging lamp posts that filled the two arched hallways with dull yellow light.

I decided, after what felt like hours of feeling the rain and blood run down my face, to see what parts of myself were still able to function without immediate surgery. I wiggled my fingers, check. My toes check. Thinking that I was now invincible because these phalanges were functioning, I decided I was strong enough to try and stand…

I slowly scraped my arms across the cement floor towards my chest; I’d have to say it was the biggest mission of my life. I carefully spread my hands out, palms down, and pretended I was attempting my 500th sit up of the day. A sharp pain pierced my left rib cage.  haha what a complete fail that was. 

“ARGHHH!” I screamed in agony.

Holy mother of god that hurt!

I slumped down onto my side and rolled onto my back, shutting my eyes and letting the rain numb the pain in my chest.

 

Why is this happening!?

Is this your way of trying to prove a point Godwin!?

 

I stared up at the sky as rain drops threatened to blind me once again.

 

To tell me I’m not strong enough?

That I can’t take the pain and suffering of the real world?

Please just tell me what I need to do…please…just help me……just help me…

 

I felt the sting in my eyes and wondered if these tears would be black. They ran in hot streaks down my face as they mixed with the rain.

I closed my eyes and let the rest of the tears fall freely.

 

This is it… I failed you. I’ve been here not even one day and I have already failed you…How could I be so stupid, to think I would actually be able to pull this off, I’m nothing, just a homeless, broken, charity case.

I had been away so long…I had forgotten what real emotions felt like, forgot how much I hated myself, hated who I was…who I am.

 

Out of nowhere I felt a sharp sting to the right side of my face.

Wow, fantastic so now I’m a psychopath with delusions of hitting herself… AWESOME just what I need right now.

Another sharp sting to the face, but this time I swear I felt a hand, a hand that defiantly was not mine.

I open my eyes slightly to see the culprit…with the tiniest paranoia that I myself could still be that culprit.

Know I’m not the finest lip reader around but anyone could tell this guy was clearly insane or on some kind of drug, absolutely gorgeous, but defiantly insane. I mean what kind of sicko, who looked like a GQ model, would slap a clearly dying (well maybe dying is an exaggeration, hurt…) young girl?

 

“CAN YOU HEAR ME!? I’M GOING TO TAKE YOU TO THE NURSES OFFICE OKAY?” This stranger said.

 

What the hell was this guy saying, it looked like he was talking Chinese…or maybe German, he did have that pretty blue eyes and blond hair look about him… I think, kinda hard to tell with all the rain, big fat gray clouds, oh and lack of consciousness.

One minute I was staring at these cute guys lips giving him the “What the fuck are you talking about stare”, the next I’m in blackness again. What the hell happened now?

Something was different though, I felt warmer…like I was covered in a big strong blanket of skin…Wait what!? Skin? Yep it was defiantly a body part of some sort.

I had felt this sensation before though…a very long time ago. I remember sitting by the fire, on an old lamb wool rug in my mothers arms…she was holding me from behind, like any mother would, their own child. Except this wasn’t just a loving embrace, it was filled with fear and sadness, as well as over welming happiness and bliss. She was crying, her tears left dark stains on my white shirt. They were tears of joy…and of sorrow.

 

I remember.

I opened my eyes and looked up to the guy who held me tight and safe in his arms, and I smiled. He helped me remember something I thought I lost. Something I thought in my 111 years of life would never come back.

In that moment I truly felt the happiest I’d been in a very long time. Such a simple thing really…

But I had forgotten what it was like here, on earth, everything is so much…more… alive, so much stronger. Every emotion, every sensation, every bruise, I could feel everything, and for once it felt good.  

 

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