today was another therapy session. you were incredibly disappointed at the destruction of the notebook but seemed okay with me starting a new one.
i've been fighting the urge to write at the same time every night. sometimes i get weak and find myself drafting a calendar to follow. i've done well enough to delete it before i can finish each time i try.
i texted casey back. i think we're gonna meet up for coffee tomorrow to discuss things between us. i feel bad about it, but it's something i owe her. we kissed, i kicked her out of my dorm, and ghosted her.
again, i don't recognize myself.
do you think it's shitty of me to figure things out with casey? obviously i felt something for her, but is it too soon? maybe casey and i can start fresh.
i don't want to rush into a relationship, especially after what i did to minx. also, if i do decide to pursue casey, i want her to be able to trust me. i don't want her thinking that i'd cheat on her.
this sucks. why can't i make good decisions?
- schlatt
