Something Beyond The Silence

Chapter Five

Chapter Five

I was pouting the entire time that I was laying on the bean bag. Si Klea naman ay nakangisi habang nakaupo na ngayon sa lapag at natitipa sa kanyang laptop. While the other two is busy by the desk.

Ang plano talaga ay magkwentuhan at mag-chill lang kami sa studio pero dahil may natanggap daw na email si Edge ay makikigawa raw muna sila rito. Si Klea naman ay nag-reply din sa mga email, iyon ang ginagawa niya ngayon.

It's related to their business and all at hindi na ako nagtanong kung ano iyon dahil sigurado ako na wala akong alam patungkol doon.

Nag-uusap pa rin kami ni Klea kahit may ginagawa pero madalas niyang binabalik ang usapan patungkol kay Nero.

Now I really regret telling her that the guy from the rooftop is Nero. Ayaw niya akong tigilan.

Umayos ako ng upo at kinurot ay baywang ni Klea. Bumulong na naman kasi ito patungkol kay Nero. Hindi sobrang lawak ng lugar na ito, malaki ang chance na mapalakas lang siya ng bulong ay dinig na ito sa buong kwarto.

Klea laugh at saka lumayo sa akin.

"Ano ba?!" Reklamo niya.

"Tumigil ka kasi!" I hissed. Pero tumawa lang ito. "Saka kapag sinabi mo 'to kay Edge o kay Nero, hindi na kita kakausapin." Pagbabanta ko pa.

She nodded and moved her hand towards her lips as if she's zipping it shut. "I won't. I promise." She said seriously but she broke a laugh.

I sighed. Hindi na pinansin ang kasama at nahiga sa bean bag. Hindi ko mapigilang alalahanin ang mga sinabi ni Klea kanina.

Bagay. Kayo.

This is where I don't like what is soon to happen.

I'm not a fan of my experiences because of that phrase. Because of that one friend that told you that and gave you false hope that there's a chance between the person who likes who.

This is also possibly the reason why I have a strong concept of crushes. One of the reasons why I don't put any effort on getting closer to the person I admire.

I experienced it twice. Nasabihan ako na bagay kami ng tao na hinahangaan ko. I never knew how they meant it, dahil ba sa itsura namin? Dahil ba pareho kami ng personality or what? Hindi ko kailanman nalaman pero dahil sa sinabi sa akin ay naniwala ako na totoo. Na bagay nga talaga kami. Na pwede ko siyang maging boyfriend. Because of that non-existent hope I thought the guy also thought the same about me. Akala ko ay gusto niya rin ako but in the end it was just me fantasizing.

The first one ended badly. Umasa lang ako dahil sa sabi-sabi. Iba pala talaga ang gusto nito at ako ang nagpauto sa haka-haka ng iba.

But it didn't stop there. The second one is a lot worst. This is the period of my life that I thought that having a boyfriend is a must because everyone has. The peer pressure is lingering around kaya napapaisip ako na dapat pati ako rin ay mayroon.

Around that time I was already being cautious with the idea of crushes dahil apparently madali akong maapektuhan ng sinasabi ng iba. I never told anyone who I like because I'm pretty sure someone will point out the phrase 'bagay kayo' at ako namang si tanga na maniniwala na naman.

I was not close with the guy and I'm not really that drawn to him. Mas similar lang talaga kami ng personality, tahimik at hindi madalas makihalubilo. Tuwing nag-uusap kami ay patungkol lang din sa eskwela.

But one time after talking to him for a project, someone teased that we look together. Everyone in the room heard it at iyon na ang naging constant pang-asar sa amin.