𝕊𝕡𝕖𝕔𝕚𝕒𝕝|𝕋𝕒𝕖𝕘𝕚𝕜𝕠𝕠𝕜[Maybe Ongoing Book.]

Why I Joined The Fandom...

Hello.

My name is Guadalupe Santana Martinez...

And i want to tell you... My toxic life...

And why... It affected me so much... That im traumatized... Even from this day... And why it only led me... To these 7 Korean men... Who saved me... But not that much....

Well...

Back when i was little... My mom and dad always fight... And before i was even born which was when my elder sister was born... My dad left my mom... And that was the first child...

And i was depressed at such young age... I was depressed ever since kindergarten started... And a matter of fact... I never went to pre-school... And only my eldest sister did...

I even had a younger sister... She was really sad as well... But i was always there for her... While my elder sister was in the room on the phone...

I would always tell my parents why they always fight... But they always say... 'Its nothing.'...

I was so angry...

That when i started getting angry i would always blame my younger sister... But i don't want to at the same time... And i would always leave my elder sister to clean the room by herself...

Our parents would hit us for our stupidity...

There was one day...

When i was in second grade... My mom got pregnant... And that was my first baby brother... My dad was so happy...

My younger sister... My dad never even tried to carry her... Because he wanted a boy...

And when he finally got the chance to get a boy he was so happy the smile on his face was so memorable till this day...

We lived at my grandmas house... Which was my dads mom... When my grandma found out that they were having their first baby... She wanted to carry her... But my mom would always say no... Because she wanted her all to herself... And my grandma always had a sad expression when my mom always said no...

But when i was born... My mom let her carry me... But happily... When i was born... I almost died hehe... I know that's nothing to laugh about but... I wish i never Existed... My mom almost got me out but then... She stopped pushing and then i went back in...

Both of her parents at first were happy to have my other sister Evelyn... The eldest... But when it came to me... They were disappointed...

But now they start loving me...

But when i went to third grade... My mom and dad separated... And i stayed with my mom...

She always drank...

She would blame us for it...

Then my sister started getting angrier and angrier so she would always try her best to take care of us... But me and my little sister being useless... Never really tried to help her... But once depression hit me... I started smiling more often... And i started laughing more often...

To not show that i've been going through depression... But then i started helping my sister going through her depression... Step by step... I always made her smile... Laugh... And those weren't fake... But... Real... It was nice for me to know that i helped her... But then she fell back in her black hurtful whole...

I tried helping her as last time... But it didn't work... She always tole me her secrets... Since she trusted me... And what i did... I kept them... To myself... Like whenever someone asked me a question that contained the secret... I always told them... 'I'll take care of that don't worry about it.' But when it comes to my parents i will always lie...