Fighting Love [Fake Boyfriend Part 2]

Chapter Thirty Three

Elizabeth's POV:

He's ignoring me.

After what happened yesterday, iniiwasan niya na ako!

"Pero hindi pwede"

He looked at me sad and hurt at the same time.

"Why?"

Hindi ako nakasagot. Bumaba ang kamay niya sa kamay ko. Pinisil niya ito.

"Why? Answer me, please baby" 

Hindi pa rin ako makasagot. I couldn't find the words to say the reasons why we're not allowed for each other.

He caressed my hand.

"Leigh. May mga bagay na hindi--"

"Pwedeng sabihin. Oo alam ko. Ilang ulit mo nang sinabi sa akin yan. But all I want is a little reason. Reason why we're not allowed" nagsusumamo nitong sabi.

This is what empathy feels like. Nasasaktan siya ngayon kaya nasasaktan rin ako. But the difference is that I'm in pain more than what he feels.

"Sabi mo mahal mo rin ako diba? Alam kong hindi ganun katagal ang panliligaw ko sa'yo to be mine but I'll promise to court you everyday if that's the only thing to make you stay"

Tears started to corner his eyes. This is the first time I'll be seeing him cry.

And it fvcking hurts me that I'm the reason why.

"Hindi lahat ng taong mahal ang isa't isa ay nagkakatuluyan sa huli"

"Pero pwede namang hindi tayo maging tulad nila, diba?"

I sighed and looked down. This is harder than I thought. Hindi ko alam na head-over-heels na siya sa akin para maging ganito.

This was a hard decision. Inaasahan ko nang ganyan ang magiging reaksyon niya pero kahit inaasahan ko na, masakit pa rin.

"Si Karl pa rin ba?"

Automatically na umangat ang tingin ko sa kaniya.

"What?"

Ngumiti ito ng mapait.

"Wala na akong ibang maisip na dahilan kundi si Karl"

Binitawan ako nito but I tried touching his hands again pero nilalayo niya na ito.

"Wha-- no! No!"

"Wala talaga akong laban sa kaniya kahit wala na siya"

I couldn't talk. Parang may bumara sa lalamunan ko para pigilan ako magsalita.

Napahilamos ito sa palad niya. And here I am, just quiet. Hindi alam kung anong sasabihin o may sasabihin ba.

"At least may lugar ako sa puso mo"

It sounded like he already accepted it but the truth is, he isn't.

"Pero selfish ako El. I knew from the moment you told me that you love me too; I want you all for myself "

Napalunok ako.

"Pero mukhang may kahati ako palagi kahit nasa akin ka na"

And then he walked away leaving me.

It's okay. It's fine.

This is better for me and for his life.

It's better for the both of us.