the strawberry dress | harry styles

14: depression

"uh harry" we were eating some japanese food from the place in camden for dinner, soft music playing behind us.
"yes my darling?" he replied.
"you mind if i...tell you something?"
"course. whats up?" he put his chopsticks down and gave me his full attention.
"well uh...i actually have depression and anxiety. i told you my mental health wasn't the best but...i wasn't that specific" i told him.
"oh shit"
"im fine. but i just...thought i should tell you. a-and i know you also have anxiety so i felt okay telling you cos you're always open about it"
"m glad you told me" he took hold of my hands and kissed them softly. "i'll always be here to for you baby"
"Right back at you" i leaned forward and kissed his cheek gently. i studied his face for a few seconds. "you're so beautiful harry" i said.
harry was really shy - his cheeks tinted pink slightly as he heard what i said.

the next day i woke up and did not want to leave my bed.

i heard harry downstairs singing to himself. i curled up into a ball and buried myself under the sheets. i pulled my phone off the nightstand and scrolled through social media. i didn't realise how long i'd been on my phone for before harry lifted the duvet to reveal me.
"you okay love?" he asked. i nodded.
"you're clearly not" he scooped me into his arms and carried me to the bathroom.
"harry im tired" i mumbled.
"you're on your phone" he chuckled. "its almost noon. c'mon you need to go to the post office and send orders" he sat me on the counter and got my toothbrush ready.
"but im cold" i replied timidly.
"i'll be right back" he let me brush my teeth then when i finished he returned to see i was standing up. he had bought one of his hoodies with him. he pulled it over my head and i slid my arms through each side. "better?"
"yes. thank you" i kissed his lips and he smiled fondly before i washed my face.
"where dyou keep your moisturiser?" he asked
"window"

as i rubbed it on my face gently, he brushed my hair gently and clipped it back as it was in my face. i swear i was falling so hard for him.
"Thank you for that" i giggled.
"no problem love" he replied, before we went back to my room. i got into some black jeans and a navy baby tee but then slipped on harrys hoodie again as i was cold.

"you want me to drive you to the post office after you eat?" he asked.
"i don't really want any breakfast" i said as my stomach rumbled. fuck.
"not even some fruit?"
"okay...uh...what now?"
"c'mon love" he chuckled at my awkwardness.
we went downstairs and harry cut me some fruit while i packed my bag. i sidled up to him and watch him arrange the fruit on a plate as he hummed a random 90s song.
"bon appetite my love" he said as he finished.
"i adore you harry" i kissed his lips gently and smiled at him.
"the feeling is mutual" he wiped his wet hands on a towel then cupped my cheeks with them. he planted a soft kiss on my temples and pulled me into his arms. i was so small but his arms felt warm. "you're so cute - i love it"

i finally sat down and ate my fruit and drank some water before i headed to the post office. after that i went to a stationary shop and picked up some supplies. i then went to the plant shop and picked up harrys favourite. i went home and when i arrived harry was reading. i went upstairs quietly and tried to do some art but i just couldn't bring myself to. i started crying softly as i really wanted to do something nice for harry but i didn't have the motivation. i wiped my tears when i finished and picked the plant up.

i stumbled down the stairs and then tripped and fell. the plant was safe but i wasnt. i rolled down the carpeted stairs and fell with a thud.
"maya!?" harry ran to help me and saw me on the floor.
"i think i'll stay here for a while" i pointed the plant. "that's a present for you"
"are you okay?" he furrowed his eye brows.
"no. but that plant is for you"
harry smiled fondly. "thank you love...oh its my favourite!"
"my mind amazes me sometimes"