Turning The Page

Seventy Seven

We had thought maybe we wanted to have lunch with the others, Aurie and Cricket both clamoring to get a chance to investigate further on the topic of all things baby... But now that we're actually here at the table in the little diner Cricket had found that we've managed to eat lunch from in some form or another all week I have to say that I do feel a little on display with the way everyone is looking at me... Even with Daddy's nose pressed into the crook of my neck because he needs the sweetness of my scent at the moment in order to be able to stay at the table with me in his arms instead of whisking me back to the hotel where he can keep me safely tucked away from everyone else in our room... 

He just wants to be alone with me... And between all the tiny kisses he keeps peppering my neck with and the stares, I kind of feel the same way... Especially with the feel of his hands splayed so protectively over my belly... Rubbing those little circles with his palms... Our baby is going to pop out already feeling so loved that they won't be able to stand it, and that's exactly how it should be. Silas absolutely should be this entranced by the thought of me being pregnant, and the way he's chosen to display it is so emotional that he keeps making me teary every time he takes a second to whisper, "Hey... I love you..." Into my ear. 

...

Silas

...

"Do you two have any names picked out?" The question comes from Cricket, only for us to be interrupted by a waitress with a big smile on her face when she asks us if we're ready to order... And it's hard not to growl at her the way she stares at the two of us all curled around each other even after we all chirp what we want, but soon enough she walks away and my sweet Mama is giving my hands on his belly a light squeeze before relaxing into me with his whole self just like he should... My sweet Mama... 

We had talked about it almost all morning, and we had settled on two names that we just couldn't walk away from, one of them hesitantly being maybe the sweetest suggestions I've ever heard, "Well... We were thinking August for a boy...A-And at first we were thinking Alice for a girl after my Mom... B-But I really feel attached to maybe naming the baby Silas Junior for a girl... Sj for short. It's just cute! And I have a strong feeling she would be just like her Dad!-"

When my sweet Bean gets started he's a little bit nervous, but eventually, the words start flowing and I start to feel quiet and a tiny bit shy as he discusses naming our teeny tiny little nugget after me of all people... And it's so strange to think that he loves me so much he'd want to pass my name down... That he mentioned maybe suggesting it to the kids when the time for grandkids and great-grandkids comes up that maybe they turn it into a tradition...

It makes my whole head all foggy and it's so hard not to squeeze him to bits right now... His whole head had been filled with thoughts of us in the backyard teaching our pups how to shift... Us all on family runs and maybe eventually taking the pups on pack runs when their old enough so they can play with other pups... And the little daydream of me and Sj tossing a ball back and forth in the backyard? I had had to lower my head into his shoulder to get through the conversation and the collar of his shirt is still damp from the tears that had fallen... 

I don't feel like I deserve to have one of our kids named after me, but it feels good to know that I am that loved and appreciated... Not that I ever for a second imagined that he ever would stop caring about me or that he wouldn't love me enough to suggest something like this... He's sweeter than syrup and it shows, Aurie and Cricket both squealing and giggling over our names with me, both Harper and Lukas looking more than amused than anything else as they let the chaos of shrieking over baby blankets and nursery themes ensue... 

It's so nice seeing him be able to interact with his friends... It's not that I don't like him hanging out with Quinn and Casper, and I tell him constantly that he is more than alright to have company over as he sees fit as long as they stay respectful... it's just nice to know that he also has some Luna friends that will be able to understand and relate to the duties he'll have to start taking over when we get back... Eventually... And since Cricket has already had a few kids of his own maybe he'll be able to help us freak out a little less along the way... Because I am freaking out a tiny bit... But in the best way... 

I just really want to keep him wrapped up in bubble wrap to keep him safe and sound until little Sj or August is here, and then they can sit and hang out in the bubble wrap together to stay safe for me... I feel like I might drown in the increased protective feelings building up inside of me and I almost can't stand to even sit here and let other people even look at my beautiful glowy Mama... 

It's even harder not to shift so I can curl up around Adrian properly and let my other side do some of the leg work in keeping him safe like he wants to. He keeps peering through my eyes and begging for us to take our Mama home so we can stand guard and protect him for the rest of our lives... 

I love him, and our new family, so much that I'm not sure I'll even be able to eat once the food comes out, and the burgers here are actually something special.