Imagine

I Notice Things

I spent a good amount of time wallowing in my self pity. I allowed myself to catch feelings for somebody whom I was never sure had a true interest in me. I had put myself in that situation, so I had to be the one to get myself out.

I decided that a week of ignoring Ariana ought to give her time to realize that I was upset with her and give me time to stop being salty about it.

I was wrong.

Within that week she made zero effort to talk to me. She even went as far as sitting in the backseat on her phone when Adriana drove me home after practice instead of our usual switching to make sure we all got in the conversation. Seeing her care so little about my reaction made me hurt even more.

She used me and then decided that I wasn't worth an apology or even acknowledgment. I had easily been replaced by Austin. It hurt more because I couldn't even discuss my pain with my best friend. I couldn't tell her that I didn't want to go out or even to her house because her sister broke my heart.

After a few days, my hurt turned to anger that burned deep.

If she didn't need me, I had absolutely no reason to need her. I went beyond distancing myself.

I stopped all contact. I unadded and unfollowed her on all of my social media platforms and even went as far as deleting some of her close friends. I didn't want to even know of her existence.

Of course, she was still my best friend's twin.

She made it easier for me in some ways. She started eating lunch with Austin which let me avoid her then, and she would sometimes catch him after his football practice for a ride home when Adriana had to drive me.

In ways that were out of her control, she made it harder. I would have to change the topic when Adriana brought her up. I always came up with random excuses as to why I couldn't come over until I just started inviting Adriana to do work at my house. It was a lot smaller than her house, but we had plenty of food to snack on while we goofed off instead of doing our homework.

Ariana didn't try anything until after 2 weeks of what had become my new routine.

She tried to talk to me at practice, but I pretended to be so focused that I hadn't heard.

She tried to wave to me in the halls, but I would act like I hadn't seen.

She tried joke around in the locker room, but I started wearing my headphones to listen to music.

She tried to demand I let her give me a ride home when Adriana had missed school and practice for a doctor's appointment, but I called my mom before she got done in the showers.

Avoiding someone with a life intertwined with yours was exhausting.

After a week of ignoring her advances, she gave up and gave me the silent treatment. It was a lot easier to run away from somebody who was behind you running in the opposite direction. I only really saw her at practice, and even then we never interacted.

It had been a total of 1 month since I had caught her on a date with Austin and done my best to remove her from my life. I knew I still had feelings for her, but they were a lot easier to shove down and ignore.

The homecoming football game had been last night. Adriana, obviously to our situation, invited me to be Ariana's "date", so she didn't third wheel while cheering on her boy toy. I made up a long essay due by Monday that I had been putting off and just had to get out of the way before the dance tonight.

   Adriana, knowing I was one to push my work off to the last minute, bought my excuse. However, the compromise was that I had to get ready for the dance at her house.