I will recover.

A seed of dreams.

"Things weren't always easy for me." Those are the words that came to my head immediately, causing a flashback.
*flashback*
I was at my dad's house for the summer. And suddenly I got the idea of having my own youtube channel to somehow become famous off of. I wasn't sure how. I turned to my stepsister and asked her. She said it was a good idea, that seemed like it would take a while. She joked that maybe she could help out and 'guest star'. After that she told me I should. But I knew I wouldn't.
*flashback ends*
I realized how easy it would be. Now that marching season is over. I didn't know what to do so I just started making videos and decided I would edit them later. Then I got a new phone and couldn't upload them. My biggest dream is to be famous for singing. But everyone wants to be a famous singer. Not everyone gets the job.
I do a lot of poetry as well, one day I want a shot to be like Shakespeare. But I'm not sure I would do to well. I might buckle.
My alarm clock began to go off again. It was a Monday, and I was to be at the bus stop in ten minutes. Yay. Late. Again. I quickly got dressed, did my hair and makeup carefully, brushed my teeth, and grabbed my phone (headphones) and backpack and left the house. Okay so I live in a old two story house. It's old so the outside looks kind of bad. We just re-did the inside. And it's really nice. My friends say it's the nicest they've been in. My family isn't poor but we aren't rich. We have enough money to pay the bills and get groceries and a bunch left over for whatever. I live in a small town called jungle. It's not on the map. But it's a cute little town, even though there's enough racism for all of the California population. But those are only the older people.
I've always hated being surrounded by people. I start having anxiety attacks, and those are silent, so no one but me knows about them. They're really scary. All of a sudden the voices are louder and attacking, it sounds like it's all about me, every word. I feel like speaking up but my tongue is gone, I can't even open my mouth. I try to get away, but my feet have only one intended direction. Out. You feel lost. Even though you know where you are.
So far I've only had three. And now I'm off to band. For a party, yay food. I ask Jason about doing the channel, he says I should sing. I agree. Then he adds that I should also do some videos of me just being my crazy self. And so far it's seems good. I think about it for the rest of the day. I soon go home. And I made a makeup tutorial video and post it and as for the singing. That would have to wait.

A/N *i really do have my own channel. Check it out sometime! Some of this stuff is actually true but most is all just dreams!