Try Me, Bitch |BnHA| |Reader Insert|

Y/n: GOD FUCKING DAMMIT DAVE

You were lying on top of the tall building, sleeping... with one eye open, cause you gotta keep an eye out for selener. You were woken up by a quiet boom out in the distance. You raised your head and looked around.

"What in the mom-fucking alabama citizen cousin gene pool was that." You sat up and looked around. About a half a mile away from you, you saw two figures hanging in the air. You made binoculars out of your hands and zoomed in on them.

'Endeavor and... is that... a nomu?' You squinted and the zoom zoomied in even zoomier.

'Goddamn he's let himself go...' You disappeared from the roof.

"Hello!"
Endeavor and High-End both turned to look at you.

"L/n!" Endeavor called out in shock. You looked at the Nomu up and down.

"Damn bruh, you really got them gains."
At the slightest movement of High-End against you, your mallet to its face was how you welcomed it. It was smashed almost two miles away. You looked at Endeavor.

"Sup Endewhore. How's it hanging?"

"What the hell are you doing here, L/n?" He asked.

"You didn't answer my question."

"You didn't answer mine."

"Yeah, fair point. Mine was about your dick anyways--"
Next thing you knew, you were being whiplashed through the air. Your vision went black for a moment, and when you came back to it, you were looking up into an office building.

"Damn, I didn't know I could teleport." You heard and felt a boom. When you looked up, you noticed High-End standing near your feet.

"Oh god, please--I don't wanna be one of those fanfics..."
High End grabbed you by your throat and slammed you into the floor again, cracking it. All of the people around you screamed and ran away like pussies.

"You know what... I don't need this." Your body turned to liquid and you slithered out of its grasp. Solidifying next to it, you did the next best option.

"IT'S JERKIN TIME, MOTHERFUCKER!" A giant fleshlight appeared in your hand and you slammed it on top of it. Now with your All Might-worthy forearm muscles, started to frantically and thoroughly jerk High-End off from the inside out. The massive, constant vibrations made it almost impossible to move. It was stunned like the gotdamn bitch that it was. When the fleshlight came, you threw it off. It was covered in pussy juices and not moving cause that gorilla grip cooch was too whet for it to handle.

A giant golf club appeared in your hands.

"MOVE OVER DONALD TRUMP, I'M COMIN FOR YO BRAND!!!!" The club struck High End, sending it, quite literally, flying away from you. You bent over and let out a giant breath, soon heaving in breathlessness.

'It's power is greater than any hero or villains I've seen.' You thought. You crouched to the ground to take a small break.

'I just hope nothing else happens.'
Several booms made you turn your head up to the giant hole. Out in the distance, you could see Endeavor fighting High-End. To their left was a building, sliced in a third. It was beginning to collapse.

'Well... I'm in too deep now!' You took off from the building. When you got to the other one, you saw people flying out by single red feathers. You blinked.

"Gnarly, dude." You looked at the sliding top of the building. "Okayyy... let's try." A giant shredder appeared, floating in mid air. It sucked in the piece of building and farted it out the other end. Both the sound and stench were overpowering.

"Oh wait--I hope no one was in there..." That's when you noticed Hawks and Endeavor fighting High-End... but then High-End noticed your ass.

"The... strongest..." It took off towards you at mach speeds.

"Oh no..."
It extended its arm, augmenting its muscles before grasping you, and slamming you into another building.

"L/n!" You heard Endeavor yell. You looked at it through its appendage. A giant smirk came up to your face.

"Aight... bet... BITCH!!!!!!!!!" A giant blade appeared behind it and skewered through it. You grabbed it, turning its arm into a field of daisies before using your amazing mallet to smash it away. However, a string appeared on the end of the blade, and in your hand.

"HOPE YOU LIKE BEING GANGBANGED BY A BUNCH OF BUILDINGS!!!!!!" With a sharp tug, High End went smashing into another building... and then another... and then one more. It then flew up into the air where you greeted him.

"WASSUP BITCH!!!" Taking your mallet, you smashed him towards the ground at mach speed. He landed with a giant explosion of dirt and dust. When the smoke cleared, High-End was already standing and regenerated quickly.

"... uh."

"Get out of here, L/n!" Endeavor yelled from your side.

"DON'T HAVE TO TELL ME TWICE!! ADIOS BROCHACHO!" You took off. However, you were captured again in High-End's grasp.

"I SWEAR I WILL PISS IN YOUR MOUTH, YOU UGLY HERPES COLD SORE!"
Fire burned it up, burning its arm, and allowing you to escape. Endeavor was right behind it. You wasted no time to thank him and instead, took off again. You took cover behind a broken building. A bright light and constant shockwave made you look up.

"Damn! Endeavor's shinier than what my cooch was in prison!!" You exclaimed in shock. When the light burned out, you noticed a majority of the nomu gone, but a piece of its head remained.

"Oh no..." You saw it elongate its arms towards Endeavor, striking him in the face.

"Ooh... karma do be a bitch."
Endeavor became a falling ball of embers. That's when you stepped in. Taking off from your hidey hole, you made a soft, Purple Pillow mattress appear below him(not sponsored). It cushioned his blow on the ground tremendously. You flew in front of the currently unconscious hero, acting as a shield.

"L--... L/n..."

'It must've picked up that Endewhore called me that. This bitch probably thinks more than I do.'

"C-child v-villain..." It tilted its neck-head at you. "Strongest."

'It's obsessed with fighting the strongest. Is that why he won't leave me alone?' You thought, glancing back at the still-unconscious Endeavor.

'He's as useless as a fuckin British ginger vegan. Guess I gotta do this alone.'
It took off after you, stretching its arms at you. You were prepared to fuck it, smash it, or both. But then something happened.

Glowing green chains wrapped around High-End's body, stopping him.

Ja ne!

{Ruby Red}