It Just Happened That Way || JEONGIN from skz!

12

Jeongin's POV

My phone suddenly started buzzing. God, it's like the ass-crack of dawn, what is happening.

It's Channie-hyung. He's messaging our group chat on Kakao. I open one eye and look at the time. Oh. It's 7:30. 

Chan: Jeongin, you should see this.

What follows are two photos of myself and Yeona. Shit.

I message back.

Oh my god. When did these get uploaded? Who's uploaded them? How do I block the photos?

Chan: I don't know, but they're really widespread now.

Minho: Excuse me, why are we awake.

Felix: Oh shit.

Minho: Oh shit.

Jeongin: What do I do?

Chan: Who is this girl? Are you two dating? How did you meet her?

Jeongin: She's my next door neighbor, we just met. But she's my friend, we hang out every day...

Minho: Every day?? wb us, tf. 

Chan: Okay, it'll be fine. You haven't broken any rules, you just got unlucky. 

Seungmin: Jesus christ u got unlucky. 

The guys try to reassure me that for me, it'll be okay. It'll be annoying to deal with, but I'll be fine. I know that they aren't saying anything about what it'll be like for Yeona because we all knew that the girl was usually the one who lost in these situations. 

At this moment, I'm not worried about myself -- I'm worried about her. This will be the first time something like this has happened in her life, I'm sure of it.

I get up and pace back and forth in my room. I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do. My phone continues to buzz as the rest of the boys wake up and try to make me feel better.

I sit on the edge of my bed, with my head in my hands. I have to go and tell her. I have to come clean, and I have to help her. It's harder on her than it is on me.

I get up and leave my apartment. I knock on her door, and a disheveled looking Yeona immediately opens the door. Her eyes are wide with ... fear? Anxiety? I can't be sure, but I know for a fact that she saw the photos.

"Yeona. You saw the photos. I can explain." I walk through the door past her, getting more and more nervous about what bomb I was about to drop on her morning. She still has to go to work, for crying out loud!

Breathless, I repeat, "I can explain."

Everything I say comes out as a single word, all strung together as I struggle to slow down or to take a breath. I'm scared to look at her directly, scared to see how she will react. Scared that she'll leave me.

"Jeongin. I'm going to be completely honest with you, but I want you to know that I have never wanted to be your friend because of you being in Stray Kids or anything like that. I was just alone and happened to click with you."

I'm confused. I frown, and my nose crinkles a little. I feel like I know what she's about to say, but I...I just don't want her to say it. My entire being can feel the betrayal coming.

"What are you saying?"

"I — I know about Stray Kids, and I knew about you from the start. It was hard not to — you guys are really famous in the states as well."

No. 

She looks awkward, wringing her hands, not looking directly at me.

I don't even notice my body moving, but now I'm standing up. I've taken a couple steps back, bumping into the side table. I don't even hear the rest of what she says.

She knew? She knew? Does she even really care about me? Does she see me as a human being? Was she stalking me?

I can feel tears creeping into my eyes, and I know I have to get out of there.

"I can't believe I trusted you," I mutter, before escaping through her door. I don't even look at her as I leave. I storm back into my apartment and yank my refrigerator door open to pull out a bottle of soju. I open it and start drinking from the bottle, before choking on the strong taste. Yuck. I hate the taste of alcohol, what am I doing.

I instead grab a cup of water, and chug a glass before slamming it down, breathing in and out. My hands are on my face as thoughts rush through my head.

How could she have not told me? How? How could she? Why did I get so unlucky? Why did it have to be her? 

Tears again. I go to my room and curl up on my bed, crying softly. I had so desperately wanted this close friendship, and I had so desperately wanted to be free, just for a moment, just with her, from this fame. To finally get to know someone as they got to know me. To have a relationship that had no expectations born from a fan's imagination of what I should be like.

Of course this would happen. I was foolish to think that she would be any different. I was foolish to have fallen for it.