It Just Happened That Way || JEONGIN from skz!

27

A/N: Hello to my few loyal readers <3 I am on vacation this weekend so i'm uploading chapters early! this one and the next are a leeeetttle bit mature, and by a little bit I really do mean a little bit. I can't take myself seriously enough to write smutty things lol. Enjoy!! 

Yeona's POV

After that first date, it felt like so much had changed in my life. It's not that my life depended on having a boyfriend to make it better, but it wasn't like it didn't help.

We became official 3 weeks after dating. I think it took so long only because we were skirting around the subject of actually putting a label on it. We weren't afraid of commitment, no. We were mostly unaccustomed to expressing such private, relationship-related thoughts to another person, and therefore unsure of how to do it. Did it need to be timed? What words was I supposed to use?

The night it happened, Jeongin and I were having a nice night in at my apartment. It was cozy — I had just bought some new plants and a rug to tie together my whole living space. He was cooking dinner for us, while I watched. It was (still) hard to believe that someone I had watched grow up from age 17 through social media and Kpop was just in front of me, full grown, cooking a meal. I smiled, thinking about how much he had grown and matured. His forearms were also so attractive while he chopped things up. I knew he could feel my eyes watching him, but it was week 3 — I simply didn't care.

We were pretty quiet that night. It wasn't awkward though. I think we were just in a peaceful mood. It was reassuring that both of us were comfortable in the silence -- a good sign in a relationship. Suddenly though, Jeongin put down the knife and put both hands on the counter, as he leaned toward me, looking deep into my eyes.

"Okay, yeah," he says after a moment, lifting his hands in surrender all of a sudden. I tilt my head to the side.

"Yeona, I'm just gonna say it. You and I — can we make it official? Like official official, today is Day 1, we are together?" The words spill out of him before he laughs at himself.

I join in, shaking my head. "Thank god you said it, because I didn't know when I should. Okay. Day 1, mark your calendar, Jeongin."

We had many simple nights like this -- it was easier to stay at home than to go out and risk exposure. We took turns cooking and cleaning, and eventually, as one might expect in an adult relationship, Jeongin slept over one night. We ... didn't have the most PG rated nights after that one.

A physical relationship with Jeongin was a crazy dream come true, honestly. The most I'll say is that I was the more experienced on in the relationship. This wasn't that surprising though -- I was older, had a lot of phases growing up, and he was an idol. He didn't have time for a scandal. None of that mattered to me though, because our comfort in our daily life was brought easily into the bedroom. Nothing was awkward, fumbles were funny, we learned what we each liked, and at the end of the night, I always ended up cuddled into his chest, receiving his kisses on the top of my head. Everything was perfect. Life felt stable, secure, warm.

It went on like this easily for half a year. Not much changed between us, but a lot changed for each of us.

For one thing, I was promoted at work! I worked hard to earn this level up as an engineer. This was really good for me because 1) I would be earning more money, and 2) it really established my place as an important engineer on this team — and thus in Korea.

My parents were anxious to have me back in the US where they could see me more often, but I couldn't imagine leaving my new life in Korea for an old one in the US. I was finally becoming really close with Jessi from the climbing gym, and the skz guys were becoming a normal fixture in my life. And obviously, I couldn't imagine doing long distance with an already busy idol.

As for Jeongin, he was spending a lot more late nights at the studio. While this was saddening, I was also becoming busier outside of work. The climbing competition from when we first started dating turned out to be a success. Although it was local, I placed 2nd among all women. With this podium placement, I ended up gaining some attention in the climbing community. Gyms in Seoul wanted to sponsor me as their athlete, and small athletic-wear companies wanted to use me as a model??! This was a huge step for me, especially when thinking about my wish of breaking through into the film industry.

Jeongin was forever supportive of me and these endeavors. He spent time with me when he could, although most of the time, it was late at night, when he would crawl into bed with me after I had gone to sleep. He couldn't tell me what was happening, but I could feel the preparation for another comeback happening. Deep down, I felt a little sad. I knew what happened during comeback season. If I thought he was busy right now, he would be a hundred times busier during a comeback. I didn't even let my mind wander toward what would happen if or when he went on tour. I just held him close all of the nights he came over.

One night, I was in bed, looking at my calendar for the upcoming weekend. I had a photoshoot for a small clothing company — a very small promotional event that would be boosted further by the climbing gym that I climbed at. I heard the front door beep and unlock, and looked up to see a very tired Jeongin walk in. He gave me a small smile with his pretty fox-like eyes before hopping into the shower.

He finally came out and joined me in bed, putting his arm around me. His hair was damp, and sitting right at his eyes. He pushed his hair back as I leaned into his bare chest and breathed in the smell of his body wash.

"Yeona?"

"Hmm?" My eyes were closed, my fingers slowly tracing circles on his abs. His finger tips were tracing soft lines up and down my back. He inhaled and stopped his hand.

"We're having another comeback."

My fingers freeze. I sigh a little. We sit in silence for a moment. I tell him, "I know." My lip twitches as I fight any tears from forming. "I could tell by how busy you were that something was going to happen." I resume drawing circles on him, trying to hide my sadness.

"I'm sorry."

I stop and push myself up to a seated position, before looking at him with a frown. "Sorry? Why would you be sorry?"

"I haven't been able to spend as much time with you lately. Lately?" He scoffs slightly. "It's been 2 months since we had a quiet moment, a date where we are both wide awake. You don't deserve that..."

"Oh stop it. Stop being like that, you know very well that I'm perfectly capable of having this kind of relationship. I wouldn't have started dating you if I thought that I couldn't handle it." I don't deserve this? He doesn't deserve to be worked so hard. None of them do.

"Okay... It's just..."

He stops and looks down at his fingers, as they twiddle with each other slowly. 

"We're going on tour afterwards," he says, looking up with his pained eyes to meet mine, and my heart sinks.