The Dancing Tale

Chapter 17(part-3)

We walked back to the parking lot where I saw Priya and kabir near his bike leaning on it.

"Why the fuck didn't you let me punch his face" Priya asked when I reached. I was not in a mood of saying anything because though I acted strong over there, I was still hurt. I was in pain. I smiled it off but from inside I know how much I am hurting and feeling tired because of all of it.

"OH kri. You don't deserve any of it." Priya said before pulling me in a hug. I guess my face gave away my inner feelings. All the tears came back again but I hold them in and clutched on her tighter. "Why are you this understandable. You deserve a break from all those pent up feelings." She said while rubbing my arms.

"I am sorry. I didn't trust you before when you told me......." I started.

"Shhh. You don't owe me any apology." She said and cut me off in the middle. "It's okay to try if you want to."

I separate myself from her embrace and shake my head. "I know. But right now I just want to be alone. Away from this clamor in tranquility." I told her. "We will see you in college."

She nodded. Then kabir came and hugged me. "You know I was wishing for a chance to break his nose since that party." He said. I chuckled.

"No need of it. I don't want you to end up behind the bars." I said and walked in the car. Rudra sat in and directly started driving.

All the memories of our dates, chats in canteen and all the other memories came rushing back to me. I was chanting in my mind to just not break down in front of rudra. I don't want him to see me in my vulnerable. I hate crying in front of people. Showing the world my tears is something I am not fond of. I don't need anybody to see me as a broken mess and try to fix me because I love myself the way I am, broken or not broken and there is nothing to be fixed. My heart is already into pieces that can never be fixed. It has been suffering from a very young age and now there is all broken pieces are left. I thought I may be lucky in this department of love, maybe I will get my connection that was meant for only me but I was wrong. My boyfriend never liked me. He only dated me because he wanted to make his ex jealous and here I was thinking that I might found the love of my life........ Slow claps for me.

I was an idiot to not understand his liking. History tends to repeat itself and I guess I am doomed with this heart break's curse. I should have known, things are going too smoothly. I should have scene those ominous cloud of distance that was between me and divyansh. But I was living in my fairy tale and forgot that my life is a far cry away from it. It's a tale for sure but definitely not a fair tale.

I remember what I told myself when I found out about my dad. I swore I will never fall in love, I used to hate the idea of love but as time passed I mellowed and my dogmatic behavior towards love changed altogether. I realized that it's all on us. The more we dwell on the hurt, the more stronger it will become. Love is the only way to heal. Not just a certain love that happen between lovers but any kind of love, caring or a sweet emotion lights a ray of hope for you to hang upon when you are falling in a deep abyss.

I have shut the doors of my heart because when sun spreads his scorching rays in desert, plants morph their leaves into hooks in order to preserve water and save themselves. You need to have an armor to protect yourself 1st then only you can fight in the battle. But I have fought battles harder than this. I know I will be alright because there is not any other option. I have to be strong. Lamenting over things you can not control does not help. It will take time in getting normal but I will get normal.

"Get out."

Rudra's voice brought me out of my mind. I didn't realized I zoned out. I looked around to see and we have reached the house. I sighed and get out of the car. I don't want to go inside my room because I know as soon as I will be alone I will cry. There were still tears but they haven't fallen out.