Seeing Blind |NH|

Chapter Sixty

When we finally arrived at the venue for the reception, Esta and I were both starving. We both made a beeline to the food before taking our places at the table set up for the wedding party.

At some point, Patrick stood up and clinked his glass. "I wanted to say a few things before we really kick this thing into high gear. First, I want to thank you all for coming. Miriam and I cannot express in words how much you all mean to us." He paused before turning to Miriam. "My love, it hurts my head to think of how many things had to happen for our paths to intersect. Of all those numberless little fortunes that somehow led me to you - in particular, me needing to stop in a grocery store on a day and time that I don't usually go...and a little spilt milk...okay, a lot of spilt milk." The crowd laughed a little. "But, somehow, we started talking and you agreed to meet me for a coffee the next day - and there we were, you and I, sharing a laugh and a hot coffee. I spent the rest of the day thinking of you. I don't often allow myself to not over think things but I couldn't not call you and ask you out again. Somehow I knew. And I've spent far too much of my life not saying the things I needed to say. So, to quote one of your favorites - I know that love is just a shout into the void, and that oblivion is inevitable, and that we're all doomed." The crowd laughed again. "And that there will come a day when all our labor has been returned to dust, and I know the sun will swallow the only earth we'll ever have. And I'm in love with you."

He bent down and gave her a sweet peck on the lips. During the course of Patrick's speech, I felt Esta wrap her arms around my waist and rest her chin on my shoulder. My hands reached for hers, holding onto it tightly as I rubbed my thumb along her skin.

Now that he was finished, it was now Miriam's turn to speak. "Confession. I had a lot of people tell me that I was crazy for wanting to marry you so soon after we started dating. But, there was no way I could listen to them when I've been searching my entire life for this. I've been educated on many things, but out of all the things I've been taught, the one thing I've learned, the one thing I know for sure, is that feelings are rarely mutual. So when they are, why run from it?" She turned away from Patrick, and looked at her guests, her eyes meeting mine for a moment, "For those of you here today, for those of you in a relationship and, even more so, for those who aren't, I have this one thing to say, when you find it, when you find the real deal - drop everything.  This is what the entire world is after and somehow you've found it." 

She turned back to Patrick. Miriam bent down and planted a kiss on Patrick. My hand gripped Esta's harder. Somehow, everything they both had just said, I felt they were saying to us; to me. A few more speeches were given and then it was Esta's turn.

"Hi," she said, sheepishly. "So, I'm not very good at words. I tend to stumble upon them the way these two stumbled upon each other." She pulled out a piece of paper that she had folded up. "I found this quote awhile back that, I admit, was meant more for me at the time. It still does, but having had the pleasure of watching these two fall in love, I think allowed me to see these words come to life and inspire me to take steps towards finding what Patrick and Miriam have found." She looked down at me for a moment and smiled. Unfolding the paper, she looked down at it. "Bob Marley once said,

'Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you've never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can't wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around; in just having them nearby. Life seems completely different, exciting, and worthwhile.'

She finished speaking, giving both Patrick and Miriam a hug.

Awhile later, after Miriam and Patrick had gone off into the proverbial sunset, Esta and I stayed to make sure everything got where it needed to go.

I was sitting down in a chair covered in confetti. My suit jacket and tie had both come off and were hanging on the back of a chair a few feet away from me. Esta's shoes had been tossed on the ground in front of it. I had a beer in my hand as I watched her saying goodnight to one of the other bridesmaids.

"What are you smiling about?" she asked as she made her way back to me.

I shook my head, "Nothing. Just watching the prettiest girl in the room." I stood up as one of my favorite songs began playing. "One last dance?"

She smiled at me before taking my hand. Pulling her to me, I rested my chin by her temple before softly singing along, "Shall I stay? Would it be a sin, if I can't help falling in love with you." I closed my eyes and continued to just hum along.

"I never expected it to be you."

I opened my eyes, unsure I had heard her, she spoke so softly. I pulled away a little and looked down at her.

"What do you mean?"

"I never expected it to be you. I didn't know it was going to be you. I didn't know that this could be fun; that a relationship can be fun. You make this fun, Niall.  You make every single doubt that I have in my head evaporate.  And I know that can't be easy for you, all the damage that someone else has done to me; that I allowed to be done to me. So I know I can't be easy to deal with sometimes because of it.  And I spend a lot of time doubting it all but I wake up and you're next to me and...and you smile at me, you laugh with me, and...and I can't believe you're mine." She moved closer to my ear before whispering, "I love you."

My heart stopped. She hadn't said that to me before. I hadn't said it to her although there had been plenty of moments when I wanted to tell her. I had always stopped myself, afraid it was too soon. I mean, had I not thought it would scare her off, I'd have told her I loved her that first night together.

I smiled at her, continuing the song, I sang, "Darling, so it goes. Some things are meant to be. Take my hand, take my whole life too. For I can't help falling in love with you. For I can't help falling in love with you..."