𝑺𝑻𝑨𝑵𝑯𝑬𝑰𝑮𝑯𝑻// adam stanheight//saw (finished!!)

𝖝

"you threw it away?" casey asked adam the next morning, staring at the trash can where his journal sat.

"yeah." adam replied.

"why?"

"cause, it's stupid." adam shrugged saying.

"not really."

adam looked over at casey staring down at the trash can awkwardly.

"are you gonna stop that?" adam said.

casey then looked at adam.

she watched him stand up and walk over to her.

adam then bent over and dug his journal out of the trash can.

when he finally brought himself back up, he stared at casey.

she looked deeply into adam's eyes.

and he did the same to her.

casey stepped closer to adam.

but adam stayed still, keeping his eye contact with her.

something about this felt off to adam.

which made him back off.

then he walked away back to his couch.

"adam." casey said.

adam turned back around to look at her.

"i think that you're very brave." casey unexpectedly told him.

adam stared.

he didn't know what to say.

"thanks?" that's all that he could think to say.

it was quite strange that'd she'd even say that.

then he sat down, flipping through the pages of his journal.

it reeked of old microwaved meals and beer.

but he didn't pay much attention to it.

dear journal,

november 20, 2006

ah, i'm sorry i threw you away. guess i never really took the time to realize how much i need you. that sounds strange. i'm just gonna stop. anyways. i found where lawrence lives. and casey and i were so close to getting caught by him. but we ran out of that place before he could even see us. what i mean by that is, well, we found his room. and he was about to come out of it, and we sprinted off. it sounded like i meant he was chasing us, which no. i think that's really all that matters. oh! i forgot. i'm still building the courage to speak to lawrence. but i'm scared he won't recognize me, or maybe he hates me, or maybe he just doesn't want me to be alive. which i hope none of that is true. i hope he can recognize me, i hope he doesn't hate me, and i certainly hope he doesn't think i should be dead. well im sure he thinks i'm dead. but i hope he doesn't want me to be dead. he looks the same. well actually he limps a lot. which i dont even know why i included that, of course he limps adam you idiot. poor guy lost a foot. well, sawed it off..anyways, i'm going to talk to him, eventually. but i'm not sure when. i'm so nervous.

adam

by the time adam was done writing, he noticed casey was standing behind the couch, breathing on adam's neck as he were writing.

"what're you doing?" adam quickly turned around and asked.

"just looking." casey replied.

adam shook his head awkwardly, and looked back down at what he wrote.