Starboy - DarLas -The Outsiders

Chapter 11

I trudged through the busy streets of New York City as sleet came down in sheets, soaking into my thin windbreaker and jeans, leaving me frozen to the bone. I watched people with umbrellas scurrying this way and that, probably wanting to get out of the soon-to-be blizzard and home to their loved ones. Or maybe they were doing last minute gift-shopping, Christmas was just around the corner. I heard the gentle clip-clop of horse hooves, probably heading back to the stables. Everyone had someone to get home to. Their families, their partners, or maybe just the TV.

Me? I was on the way to my late boyfriend's funeral. I was only fourteen then, and he would have been turning 16 at the end of the month. But I had a tough reputation in these parts. Most people found me intimidating, but he didn't. 

We were buddies, best friends. Until we were more than just best friends. We tried to keep it a secret, but word traveled fast. Luckily, people still found me intimidating, but they were out to kill my boyfriend. The authorities weren't having it, either.

One night, I took him out for a movie. He didn't want to go at first, but I convinced him to go with me at the end. I took him to the movie house, and we enjoyed a good movie. We got some nasty looks, but I had a special little finger to counter it. We were having a good time, just enjoying ourselves. We didn't kiss or hold hands or anything romantic, because we weren't totally oblivious. It was annoying enough to watch a straight couple do that shit, so I couldn't imagine what everyone in the theatre would think if we tried anything.

Later that night, we were driving around town, looking for something to do, trouble to cause. We ended up pulling into a vacant lot and just sitting there for a while. We had done our fair share of drinking, and were pretty hyped up. We decided the vacant lot was empty enough that we could enjoy ourselves a bit. Soon enough we were kissing in his car.

We were interrupted by two cops, who didn't seem to like us very much. They told us to get out of the car, and made us answer some questions. When I look back on it, it was entrapment. I should have gotten a lawyer or something, but I was young ad didn't know any better. Plus, I highly doubt anyone would want to serve as a defendant for a homosexual.

The cops called in to the station to review our records. I was a free man, but my boyfriend had a record a mile long. He hadn't done anything wrong. But that didn't stop them from handcuffing him and taking him down to jail. He didn't even get a trial, but according to the cops he had somehow earned himself 6 months time in the cooler. I waited and waited for the day he would get out of prison. I missed him so bad, and his memory is what kept me going for five months. Then came the sixth, so close to the day of his release. But it never came. 

I remember waking up that morning to the sound of someone knocking on my apartment door. I lived with my old man, my real old man. He was nice, but he worked more than Darry did trying to make ends meet. He cared for me like a dad should. I still miss him.

I opened the door, and there stood another friend of mine. We were close, and he accepted me and my boyfriend for who we were. But he was into chicks, so even if I did like him I wouldn't have stood a chance. He looked shook up, as if something had happened. I invited him inside, and he suggested I sit down. So I did. He told me the news.

My boyfriend had killed himself.

I opened the door to the church and shut it, some of the snow getting through the door and scattering itself on the carpeted tile before melting. I took off my windbreaker, revealing my damp shirt and tie getup, courtesy of my crappy windbreaker. I hung said windbreaker up of the coat rack. I walked over to the guest book and somehow signed my name despite the fact that my hand was shaking wildly. It could be from the anxiety or the cold, possibly both. I wasn't planning on drawing any attention to myself, so I wanted to at least let his parents know that I was here.