Wei Ying's destroyed heart (Complete) Edited

20: Can Wei Ying ever trust again?

Wei Ying hated that he had no strength at all; so those feeble punches and struggles he used to get out of Lan Zhan arms wouldn't even fight of a half drowned kitten. He felt so pathetic at his weakness.

Lan Zhan almost didn't notice those punches from the man in his arms, they were just that weak and the worse thing for him was the knowledge that he had caused this to happen to Wei Ying. 'I did this to you ... I did this ... forgive me ...' With one arm securely wrapped around Wei Ying, his other rose and started to stroke his hair that now that he feels it, is not as silky as it use to be.

'No! ... Let go!' Wei Ying all but screamed and he struggled as hard as he could to get free even though he knew he had no hope of doing so.

Lan XiChen and Master Lan noticed the desperation in Wei Ying's eyes and voice as he tried to get free from WangJi's arms. To be honest they feared he would suddenly lash out with Demonic Cultivation just to get out of the arms that now held him tighter than any binding ever could, but no attack of that kind happened.

'Please Wei Ying ... forgive me ... I ... I will wait for as long as it takes for you to believe me ...' Lan Zhan just let his desperate pleading out, knowing he would never stop begging to be forgiven. He knew that most men would not be caught begging anyone for anything ... he didn't care, he would spend the rest of his life on his knees before this man to gain his forgiveness.

'Get off ... let go ... don't you dare touch me!' He screamed as he kept struggling with what energy he had left but knew if Lan Zhan was the one holding him, there was no escape. Even when he had his full physical strength he had almost never been able to free himself from Lan Zhan's hands as this bastard was freakishly strong.

'I will never leave you again ... I will never allow anyone to hurt you again.'

'Stop lying ... I don't believe you ... just let me go!'

'I will never believe anyone over you. I will never allow even my own family to hurt you.'

'Stop lying, stop lying, stop lying ...' he screamed then caught a sob that tried to escape even thought the tears ran free down his cheeks. 'Stop lying.' He ended in such a pitifully small voice. 'Don't touch me .... Let me go.'

'I will wait as long as it takes for you to forgive me ... even if it takes a thousand life times, I will find you again and again and I will wait. I will do everything I can. Please my Wei Ying; forgive me for being tricked by that traitor and for believing his words over you. Please .... Please... please...'

'Not yours ... Stop! Lying! To! Me! And! Let! Me! Go!' He said each word with as much force as he could gather.

'I will never again let you go. From this moment on, I will be by your side protecting you form everything and anything.' He gulped when Wei Ying became deathly still in his arms but he knew he had not given up his fight for freedom he was no longer willing or able to give him.

'Why ...'

'Why what?'

'Why should I give you the chance to throw me away again and hurt me again so bad that I cough up blood ...' Wei Ying suddenly felt himself pushed away ... but not released. He was being held at arms length away so Lan Zhan could see his face and eyes but Lan Zhan's hands held firm on his pathetically think upper arms. He didn't mean to say those words ... he never wanted them to know just how badly they injured him right from the start, before he even left the Cloud Recesses. He didn't care about them seeing the physical damage he held in his body ... but not that.

'When?'

'Why should I tell?'

'Tell me now.'

Wei Ying glared down at the man who refused to let go of him as his tears dripped down onto Lan Zhan's chest. 'Damn you ... Do you think I would ever allow any of you to see me cough up blood when you told me to leave and not return. You want to know when it started ... from the moment I woke up bound and locked away by you all, I had to force it to stay in. I held it in until I could get far enough away and then I released it out there ... It's not as bad as it use to be. It use to be every day ... now ...' he stopped and looked at the wall by the bed not really wanting to say the rest.

'Now? .... Wei Ying ... Tell me right now, how often are you still coughing up blood?'

'Only a few times a week.' He lowered his voice hoping none of them would hear his answer, but they all have incredibly good hearing from growing up in this silence.

'A few times a ... Aaagh.' Lan Zhan let a scream loose that tore at all of their hearts. 'If that bastard was not already dead, I would hunt him down myself and take his life.'

'Who?' For the first time ever, he saw unadulterated emotions sitting plainly on Lan Zhan's face. He couldn't even make himself cover any of it.

'Jin GuangYao. About six months after .... we ... threw you out ...' he pulled Wei Ying back into his arms and this time refused to let him go. When Wei Ying didn't fight him, he finally felt some hope. 'We found out that Jin GuangYao had been using talisman to manipulate everyone ... brother found one sewn into one of his robes and soon enough we found all of us had every garment with material talisman sewn into them. They made our minds ... no, that is just an excuse ... I spent time out there looking for you, but soon ... I just didn't have the heart to face you after what we did.'

'How did he die?' Wei Ying forced himself not to wrap his arms around Lan Zhan even though every fibre of his being wanted him too. He felt tears burn his eyes as his body trembled with his fight. His fisted hands pressed hard against his chest as this really was the only thing he could do.

Useless.........

It was all just so useless............

Two and a half years and it just shatters like this ..........

Damn him..........

Two and a half years of schooling his hatred for this man who now held him so tightly, and that hatred begins to vanish like morning mist when the sun rises.

Damn him.

How dare he do this to me ...

This is all a lie ....

He is not sorry for anything ....

Is he? ...

Is he telling me the truth? ....

Is it even possible I can have ...

Everything back .....

No!...........

Don't be stupid! ....

This is just a lie! ...

But is there any hope for me to be happy again.

Don't be stupid.

Don't let them suck you into believing them just to be thrown away again.

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Hello, Just wanted to thank you for reading my fanfiction and  now that I am editing it, I hope it is still enjoyable .... sorry for any tears spilled.