The Bygone Empress

Chapter 5 - Acceptance

Time passed as Mandodari adjusted well in Lanka. She took the responsibilities of Lanka as a queen and of the palace as a daughter in law. But life was not all roses for Mandodari. As time passed, she got to know about the real ravan. Not that he misbehaved with her, but his behavior with others scared her to core.  

The thing she hated the most was her husband's lust towards women. She knew that ravan was an learned man. She saw him worshipping mahadev, coming up with great ideas for his people, using his knowledge from vedas in his responsibilities as a king. But she also noticed the other side of the coin.

His ego was his biggest enemy. He could go any extents just to fulfil his ego and lust. Mandodari tried her best to persuade him but he would just shut her up with his ego laiden words.

She sighed as she continued playing with the flowers. She felt really close to them. Flowers provided her a sense of calmness that everything else failed to provide her.

"If you get time after playing with these flowers, do look at your husband's behavior too maharani Mandodari." She heard a sarcastic voice as she looked up. Her eyes poped out as she looked at the same reflection from the day in her home.

"You?" She whispered in shock.

"Ya me. I mean, it's you Maharani Mandodari." Her bold reflection said in taunting manner.

"What do you want now?" Mandodari asked.

"I'm here to check upon you." she mocked.

"Check upon her or taunt her." Another familiar voice came as her softer reflection interrupted their conversation.

"Whatever helps to float your boat. I came here to tell you that I was right about Lankesh. See, even after marrying him, even after being a maharani, you are nothing but a discarded piece of furniture." The bolder one mocked.

"Watch your words! You are taking to the maharani of trilok. Ravan is very possessive about her. So watch how you talk to her." her softer reflection requested.

"Is he possessive about her? Yes! But he loves her? No. Absolutely not. He he would've loved her then he would not go lusting after women and keeping them as mistresses." The bolder one said in a harsh tone that made Mandodari flinch.

"So what? Kings do have various relations but they have only one queen that they care about and that's Mandodari." The softer one said.

"Really? Care about? Ravan has a whole harem full of women. Many willingly come to him and those who don't, he uses force. And when Mandodari explains him not to do so, he clearly refuses. What kind of a love is that?" The bolder one said suffocating the already frustrated Mandodari.

"STOP!! JUST STOP!! He might have many women but he only loves me! He's my husband and he loves me only! Just stop manipulating me!" Mandodari yelled at the top of her lungs.

Mandodari resisted her inner voice, ignoring ot until she could. This was the first time she was receiving love and didn't want it to be another thing to be snatched from her.

"He loves me. His love is not a lie. He loves only me. So what if he has many relationships with women, I'm his wife. Kings and devas also do have many concubines and partners. So what if my husband also has some. He loves me, only me." she said to herself, shivering in nervousness.

It was her insecurities and fear that didn't let her accept the fact that Ravan was going at the wrong path. Though she knew he was wrong, she didn't want to accept it. It was like she was juggling in between two same yet opposite things. By now she was utterly confused, trapped in a web within herself.

"Mandodari?" A familiar voice reached her ears as she turned around.

"Priye, you seem stressed. Is everything okay?" he asked as he noticed her body shivering and covered in sweat.

"Nothing nath. Maybe I'm just tired." she said, avoiding his gaze.

"Priye, you have so many sevants to do your work. So why do you stress about it?" He said pulling his wife in his warm embrace.

"Nath, will you give me something if I ask for it?" She asked after a few minutes.

"Ask for anything love. I will get the whole trilok at your feet." He said.

"Nath, please leave the women you've captivated forcefully." she said after gathering a lot of courage.

"Mandodari! How can you expect me to do that?" Ravan asked breaking the hug.

"Nath, they are someone's wives, daughters. It's not right to keep women captivated forcefully and abuse them." Mandodari carefully said not wanting to ignite her husband's anger.

"Forcefully?" he laughed.

"Priye, they should be proud that Lankapati glanced at them. They should be proud that they are related to Lankapati Ravan. And what is this forcefully? I have fought wars and won them. I am the winner. They should be thankful that I gave them shelter after their family and kings failed to protect them." Ravan said turning around, his back now facing Mandodari.

"Nath, women are not trophies that you can win. And what if someday you fight a war and loose. Then maybe I'll also end up in some harem of a king and be abused by him. Would you-"

"MANDODARI!! WATCH YOUR TONGUE!" Ravan screamed at the top of his lungs making Mandodari flinch in fear.

"How dare you say such words about yourself huh?" He asked as he gripped her shoulders painfully.

"Remember who I am. I'm the great Lankapati Ravan who never looses. I don't loose Mandodari. I am a winner. And you are just mine and no one else's. No one has the audacity to even spare a glance at you. And even if someone did, I will cut in into infinite pieces and give him such a painful death that even his upcoming generations will remember who Lankesh is. Understood?" He yelled as Mandodari squirmed at her place ignoring how painful his hold is.

Mandodari nodded at his words.

"Worda Priye, I need words." He said in a deadly calm tone.

"Ye.....yes nath." She said in a slow voice. Ravan left her and Mandodari stumbled a bit, tears pouring out of her eyes.

She looked at the retrieving figure of her husband as she cried helplessly. It was like even after performing all her duties with complete devotion, she was failing. Even after getting everything, she had nothing. Like even after being an empress, she was just a bygone empress.

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