going seventeen | seventeen

Chapter 37: Together

i took a short break so here's a short short update!

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some things are meant to be, but that doesn't mean they would last. at least that's what soonyoung tells himself. a day has passed since the party for chan that left a bitter feeling in his chest. since then, he had done nothing but think about his decisions.

seungkwan left the house because he was afraid being anywhere near jihoon. junhui went home as well while wonwoo stayed behind. soonyoung was grateful to have wonwoo by his side. he would always ask for his insight about the things going around in his head.

mingyu and minseul had gotten so much closer. minseul grew very fond of the boy and she's happy with his company. they trusted each other because neither ever gave the reason to do otherwise. soonyoung noticed every little thing between the two. he silently observed whenever they were near and it only made him question why he doesn't feel an ounce of jealousy anymore.

he rest of the members kind of avoided talking to soonyoung (except for seungcheol, of course) he knew this would happen. his members would give him the cold shoulder for cheating on minseul. soonyoung feels like he deserves it, but at the same time it frustrates him. even a little bit of support from his friends would be great.

"are the boys saying anything about me?" soonyoung asked wonwoo. it was a sunny day and they were sitting down on the ground next to soonyoung's plants.

wonwoo let out a deep sigh. he didn't want to snitch on the other members, but seeing soonyoung so down made him feel bad about lying. he knew he wanted the truth. "to be honest with you, we have a new chatroom without you, jihoon and seungcheol in it. and yes, they say a lot about you, soonyoung. unfortunately, i can't say what they're saying exactly but i think you already have an idea of what they may be."

"hmm, yeah, i see. thanks for being honest with me." soonyoung bit his lower lip as his head drooped forward.

"i don't know what they want me to do," he continued.

"some of the boys don't really support you and jihoon. they think it'll just be a problem to the group," wonwoo replied, "i mean, don't take it the wrong way, they just"

"yeah, i know, i know."

everything is so exhausting to soonyoung. whenever he sees mingyu and minseul, he's convinced that they're already good together. but he couldn't deny the fact that minseul still loves him. she's still waiting for him to come back to her.

but it's just never the same for soonyoung anymore. an apology wouldn't fix anything. minseul would still have her heart broken, and the rest of the boys would see soonyoung as the asshole who left her hanging.

everything is so exhausting to soonyoung. and that feeling intensifies as every passing hour makes him realize that their relationship is going nowhere but downhill.

unless he takes a turn.

it was the next day when he saw minseul in front of the house, watering what's left of the plants by the window. the wind was cold and soonyoung's hands were freezing.

as soon as minseul turned, she was in disbelief. she expected mingyu to come see her, but it was soonyoung instead. he still looked beautiful as ever. the warm sunlight on his face was giving him such a heavenly glow.

"minseul, i'm sorry."

those were the first words that escaped his lips. suddenly, minseul felt her heart racing.

"it's okay, soonyoung. you don't have to apologize."

"no, i was acting like a jerk and you didn't have to be treated the way i treated you. please forgive me."

"h-hey, i told you already!" minseul awkwardly chuckled, "i understand the situation."

soonyoung looked at her and he wanted to cry. his lips were trembling and he didn't know what to say next. minseul could see that he was having a hard time, so she held his freezing hands tightly.

"minseul, let's get back together."

the girl was in shock. the two of them stood there in silence, with soonyoung just looking down on his feet. he was only waiting as he watched his teardrops fall and hit the ground.

when minseul hugged him, he couldn't help but cry. it was heavy for the both of them, but in very different ways.

"i missed you, soonyoung," minseul whispered. soonyoung nodded, absently looking to one side.

soonyoung didn't know what to say or how to act. he felt the same, but he wasn't crying because he didn't have to miss her anymore.

he was crying because this isn't what he wanted. but just like what everyone around him is saying, he should stop being selfish.

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im gonna go now arrivederci

see u tomorrow!