chase thoughts, dialogue and actions
noen thoughts dialogue and actions
other characters thoughts, dialogue and actions
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"I remember when I first noticed that you liked me back
We were sitting down in a restaurant waiting for the check
We had made love earlier that day with no strings attached
But I could tell that something had changed how you looked at me then"
K- ciggerettrs after sex
a/n cigarettes after sex reminds me of choen for some reason...
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so that's what we did. we worked on the project for about an hour and we both got 2 of 10 done so we are about half way done. i was exhausted and drained from the day i've had so after i finished the second slide i laid back and let out a sigh.
"i can't work for another second. wanna watch a movie?" i was zoning out, staring at the wall when i felt the bed sink and bounce next to me, the sudden movement startled me and my flight or dight kicked in. i flinch and quickly hold away. i look over to chase, who has a concerned expression with a hint of confusion. that's when i realzie i'm in the saftey of chases room, on his bed and looking into his beautiful eyes and i feel at ease.
"it's okay, you're with me, no ones gonna hurt you here." he says in a reassuring tone. i move back to the spot i was in and got comfortable.
did one jumping really cause him so much trauma? i mean i suppose it adds up, it is pretty fresh in his mind and he did get beat on pretty bad.
"okay, so what should we watch?"
"ooo let's watch the fault in our stars." noen squeals
"really noen? isnt that for preteen girls."
"what? i like romance movies is that so weird? we can just watch something else then."
"n-n-no if you wanna watch the fault in our stars that's exactly what we will watch."
he smiled wide which made my heart flutter. i'll do anything to make this boy happy and i mean it. the movie started playing, hazel had just arrived to her cancer support group and gus had just made his first appearance.
"i love anse egorts character plus he is so hot." i say .. yes i'm bisexual.(kinda forgot if i made him pretending to be straight or not .. j go along with it.)
"woah, i thought you had a girlfriend."
"so? i can call other people hot." speaking of abby i realize i haven't spoken to her in days. i haven't nor spoken to her for more than a day for 4 years. we have only been dating for about half a year but we were best friends before that. it was going great at first; i really liked her but a couple weeks ago i don't donr know what happens, i guess the flame blew out. anyways, she's always been here for me ever since she was new to the school, i never had very many friends and she always stood by my side. and i still can't understand why. i can't understand why anyone would want to be there for me or have me in their life i see myself as a burden. i can't even see why chase wants me to work on the project with him and hang out with him after when he could just force me to do it alone. its somewhat off putting to me. i look over at chase, completely disregarding the movie and took a second to fully admire him. he was very easy to look at, so easy i could stare at him for hours. i love everything about it, not just the aparent features such as his eye color which may i add is the best shade of blue. but the silly details looked outstandingly beautiful such as the way his nose spread across his face and looked to be the perfect shape for a nose. the way his hair dangled across his face in the most lovely way not to mention how pretty the color was, brown and untainted i can tell he's never dyed his hair. i notice his eyes glance over at me and his facial expression turn slightly confused, which grew to a smiley blush face.
"noen? you're staring." he says with a smirk i feel my face grow hot which was probably accompanied with a obvious blush which gave everything away.
"uh- i- sorry i just zoned out i wasn't staring at you." i said in attempt to cover up my pst actions.
"yeah sure buddy whatever you say."
"hey! i'm telling the truth." i argue
"hey noen it's okay to admit you were staring, finding someone else attractive is perfectly okay according to you remember?"
"whatever, you're such an ass, chase." i say rolling my eyes
i love the way he says my name, and that eye roll ... fuck what's he doing to me.
"oh really? i'm an asshole? at least i was watching the movie and not being a stalker."
"shut up chase i wasn't even staring at you." i say grabbing a pillow and hitting him with it. causing a smile to grow on our faces. he throws the pillow back at me.
"make me "
"oh i will." i say grabbing the pillow and gently hitting him with it. i whip the pillow at his stomach and move closer to him for better impact. i find myself kneeling over him, with him in between my legs. i continue to hit him both of us uncontrollably laughing. i look to see the unusual position i am in and this brings an uncomfortable sexual tension that was almost impossible to ignore. i stared into his eyes feeling awkward and moved off of him.
"s-sorry."
"for what? we were just playing around." he says innocently acting as if it was completely normal. i laid back to my original position next to him and
focused back on the tv. the movie continued and we talked over most of the movie either talking about silly topics or making commentary on the movie. the movie ended and i looked at my phone to realize it was 8 and i has been here for 4 hours.
"wow it's kinda late i should head back now"
"wait,don't go!" i said a little too desperately. i was having a good time with him in fact i was having one of the best nights i've had ina while and i didn't want it to end just yet.
"i mean .. you don't have to go just yet.. we can hang out longer if you want. we can smoke?" i said trying to save myself
"yeah that's be nice, plus i definitely don't wanna go home."
i smiled and grabbed the stuff from my bedside table. i kept the weed and the grinder in the drawer under a false bottom so my mom won't find it. i walk across the room to retrieve my bong that was hidden behind some clothes ik my closet. we did our best to smell proof the room and started smoking.
"we should play some music."
"yeah sure i'll play something." noen said turning his phone on and clicking on the green spotify icon. the song right here by lil peep started to play and it brought a smile on my face.
"i love this song." i said smiling before pressing my lips against the glass and lighting the bowl.
"i don't give a fuck i love who i love and girl you're that one so i'll wait right here." i sang alone to the lyrics and looked into his eyes.
and i realized how true those lyrics were. and even if i didn't wanna admit it i really like him and i'd do anything for him. and i know what you're probably thinking 'chase you've just admitted to it' well yes i have and i'm okay with that because i'm here with him right now and when i'm with him everything else disappears and all this shit just seems to make sense. now i'm almost certain my mindset will change the second he leaves. but i'll just embrace it while it's happening. i give him a warm smile.
"baby how you doing i know you're not doing the best but i'm here i'll always be here." he sang along to the song.
"tell me how you're doing and call me if you're feeling alone."
"cause i'm here i'm always right here." we sang in unison, staring contently at each other, our voices choppy and out of tune. with the way he looked at me it almost seemed like he was in the same trance i was in. god i love the way his eyes light up when he looks at me, i will never forget the way he looks at me.
and before i know what i'm doing i feel myself start to lean in towards him.
the sound of music and laughter filling the room and the thick, loud smell of weed which no matter how many candles you light it's almost impossible to mask the odor. the vibe was unbeatable.
a/n
i'm writing this during zoom class and this is why you're failing all of your classes scarlett, no the reason i'm failing all your classes is because you're severely mentally ill 😀
