Tearing Apart

HOSPITAL TALK

He sat at the waiting room for hours rubbing his hands together and roaming over her words. By the time a doctor came out the door and walked up to him he felt crappier than ever.

-Are you the husband?- He asked while shaking his hand

-Yes- He lied

-She seems to be fine- he explained- she just had a mild concussion and some minor cuts, we already cleaned and stitched the wound on her head, but I'd like to keep her here for tonight so we can make sure everything is ok.

-Can I see her now?- Gus asked pleadingly

-Sure, let me show you the way

He thanked the doctor after he pointed the door to her room and he stood looking at it for a moment, uncertain. He took a deep breath and got himself in. Her head flew to his direction. Her eyes immediately darting down her hands when she saw him standing there.

-Hi- He said

-Hi- She muttered

-How are you feeling?

-I'm ok

He made his way to the small couch beside her bed and sat down, scanning her face quietly

-Care to explain yourself?- He asked after a while

She looked up at him, her eyes glazing

-I'm sorry Gus... I just went to this bar. I wanted a drink... and there was this guy, he bought it for me and I allowed it, we started talking and he went to grab my leg, then my crotch...

Gus closed his eyes, breathing deeply

-Did you fuck him?

-No! of course not. I left as soon as that happened, I didn't even finish my drink! But I felt so guilty I let him buy me that shot and flirt with me

He sighed relieved – Were you planning on cheating?

-I...No...I think I was just angry and disappointed at you and I felt like punishing you. I guess I was just so scared that you were going to end up doing nothing with your life. That you would end up like...

-Let me guess... one of your exes- he cut her off angrily

His eyes hardened and he held her gaze, making her shiver

-You know what, Ally? I'm not even mad about the guy thing, you didn't do anything wrong. The fucking pervert touched you, that's it. But what I'm really mad about is that you hadn't even talked to me about how you were really feeling. All you did was let it fester inside you and all it ever came out from you was a bunch of condescending comments and a lot of nagging!

There was a knock at the door and they both became silent

-Come in- Ally called and in came a police officer holding some papers

-Miss Eckert, I'm officer Holt- He said looking at the notes- You will be needing to follow the process of your car accident next Monday, you can work the details with your insurance company. Anyway, our expert's report and the witnesses support your version. The other driver skipped the red light and he was also fairly drunk. Your breathalyzer test came out fine and below the permitted level. So, if you please sign here- he extended her a document and a pen- I'll be on my way and we'll see you on Monday.

-Thanks- Ally signed the paper and he promptly left.

They kept quiet for a while. The silence extending between them.

-Do you think you can drive me to the impound lot on Monday? – she finally asked shyly

He sighed and ran his fingers through his beard

-No, Ally. I can't. You're gonna have to figure this out on your own. I'm supposed to be starting on my new job on Monday in a factory outskirts so I'll be busy.

-What? Really?

-Yeah, Ally. I was going to tell you all about it at dinner tonight. I wanted to surprise you. But well...we both know how that went.

-Wow- she murmured- I'm sorry

-Listen Ally, I told you I was going to take care of this on my own and I did. I begged you a thousand times to Iet me do it and not only you didn't listen, but you had to keep poking over and over again for months. I don't know who do you think I am but I'm not one of your ex boyfriends. So stop comparing me to them!

He looked at her frustrated

-I know, I'm sorry!-she whispered

-Ally, it just fucking hurts so much finding out that you still don't trust me. That you still can't talk to me. And I love you but you're making it really hard right now.

His angered eyes pierced her soul making her feel awful

He sighed- I'm gonna go now. I need to clear my head- He said, standing up and making his way to the door- I'll stop by your place and I'll bring you some clothes in the morning.

His eyes looking at her so sadly, she could feel the disappointment dripping from them.

He closed the door behind him and left her there sulking in her self-hatred.