PROJECT SEKAI: What even is Love

Love at first complement

"Tsukasa-kun! You're such a good actor. Your worth on the stage is more than I could ever say."
That complement, it sparked an odd feeling in me. Now, whenever I see or even think about Rui, I get red in the face. My heart pounds, my mind goes crazy. I don't know how to deal with feelings like this. I only thought girls felt this way...I guess not. It feels really weird...I just want to know! I need to know! I pull out my phone.
Rui...Rui...Rui...here he is. My heart is pounding...can I really do this? Am I just a coward if I can't admit it to his face? My mom will probably check my phone if I do something reckless like that. It's beginning to hurt...I don't know what to do. I wanna throw all my feelings at him.
I'll text him.
Tsukasa: Hey Rui.
Rui: Tsukasa-kun! What's up? You never usually greet me like that. What's up?
Tsukasa: I want to talk you in person...less people around the better...
Rui: Okay...just be careful...
Tsukasa: It'll be just the two of us! It will be fine!
Rui: ...Well it's past midnight, have you been up all night over this?
Tsukasa: Yeah...sorry...
Rui: Don't apologize! It's gotta be important if it's keeping you awake at night. Now we both need some shuteye. How about I come over once your mom leaves for work?
Tsukasa: That sounds good thanks.
Rui: Np, tsukasa-kun. See you in the morning.
Tsukasa: Mmm, same to you.
AHHHHGH! I DON'T THINK I CAN DO IT. I just want to know what love is...why does it feel like this...why is it hard? Why does it put my head in a spin? What the hell am I doing? I need sleep. Rui...Rui...zzz...

MORNING

"Saki...leave me be...just tell me when Rui gets here..."
"Rui? Kamishiro-san? Sure, any reason you're inviting him over and not the rest of your troupe?"
"I wanted to talk to him about something in person. If I didn't, I'd feel like a coward."
"Onii-san, do you like Kamishiro-san?"
"How...? How could you tell!?"
"Onii-san, you are red in the face! You've been like this all morning! How could I not know!?"
"I'm off to work you two! No fighting now."
"Okay! Bye mom."
Hah, Rui...Rui...
"Fufufu~He looks like someone out of a shoujo anime."
I heard a knock on the door. Rui! I jumped out of bed and ran to the door. There before me, stood Rui. He looked amazing today. I let him in.
"Kamishiro-San! Hello!"
"Pfft. Hi Saki-Chan."
"All I ask is, cheer my brother up for me. It's a task only you can do!"
"Saki!"
Oh no...Rui looks confused...I fucked it all up. Saki...no...it's not over yet! I gotta keep going! I lead Rui into my bedroom and shut the door. I hope he isn't scared...oh no. He's even more confused...oh god...
"Tsukasa-kun?"
"Y-yes?"
"Sit, let's talk. About last night, what is it that you needed to tell me in person?"
"Well, for the past few months now, that we've been working together, I caught feelings. My heart pounds whenever I think about you. My mind goes crazy, I can't think about anything else other than you. Is this what love feels like?" I continue, "Rui, ever since you told me my acting skills were worthy of the stage, I fell head over heels. Is this what love feels like?"
"You've been holding this burden for too damn long. I feel the same way. Does that put you at ease?"
My shoulders suddenly relax, my eyes start tearing up, my face getting redder by the minute. Rui wraps his arms around me. I felt so happy. This is what love feels like. It's amazing...
"Hey, Tsukasa-kun, close your eyes for a minute."
"Ok..."
Suddenly, Rui kisses my lips. Not roughly but not too soft either. My first kiss...it feels good, it feels like I've reached a feeling of happiness that can't normally be achieved. Rui let's go of me and my lips.
"Why did you stop?"
"I need to breathe, Tsukasa-kun and so do you."
"Yeah, I guess you're right. Can we do it again?"
"Mmm, of course. We should do it for as long as we please."
"Saki won't care, she figured it out before I did."
"Ahahaha. I'm not surprised. Girls have a strange instinct like that."
This time, the kiss was more rough, felt kinda sloppy but still good all the same. It must be Rui's first as well. But, my mind is going blank. I don't know how much longer I can take it. Mmm...Rui...please don't ever stop. I'm begging you. Rui, I love you!
I pull him down on the bed with me. We kept going and going until we were to tired to carry on with it.
"Hah...hah..." My mind became a blank page, all I could fell was just my whole body going insane.
"Tsukasa-kun, you good?"
"Yesh, hah...hah..."
"You seem exhausted. Let's rest. When will your mom be back?"
"Around 19:00. We got a lot of time. We should also maybe plan a date."
"Mmm, that sounds nice. Wanna do that now?"
"Yes."
Rui and I worked for hours planning our first date. Between all the love breaks and planning it was 18:30. I didn't want him to leave. But he had to. I didn't want my mom to know. Before Rui left he asked me,
"Any reason you don't want your mom to know about us, Tsukasa-kun?"
"She's really really homophobic. I have to pretend to be straight for my own safety."
Rui kissed me one more time and then hugged me.
"Worst comes to worst, you can always come live with me if things go wrong."
"Rui, thank you so much. I needed to hear that."
"Of course, Tsukasa-kun. Well I should get going. See you tomorrow at school."
"Okay!"