𝑀𝒶𝓎 𝒲𝑒 𝑀𝑒𝑒𝓉 𝒜𝑔𝒶𝒾𝓃 (𝒶 𝐿𝑒𝓍𝒶 𝓍 𝒴𝑜𝓊)

seventeen >>> rest

One punch, two punch, three punch. They keep coming. My eyes are heavy and my body feels so numb. I'm not even entirely sure what's going on. I can't make clear of really what's going on. My vision is blocked when I open my eyes, but right now it's just best to keep my eyes closed. Like that's going to fix any of the pain I'm feeling. And once the punches stop I hear some type of drill thing. This only causes my body to perk up, tense and shake at the noise till I feel my shirt ripped and something pinch my skin. A loud blood piercing scream escapes my lips and continues to come out as the drill goes further into my skin... 

I jolt awake feeling myself burning up. My whole body ached and felt like it was on fire. But what caught me off guard was something cold on my head and a hand resting gently against my stomach. My eyes open and close repeatedly, slowly turning my head and glancing up. There I'm met with Lexa with her eyes closed. A gentle smile spreads to my lips staring up at her. And I wanted to look away and move but at the same time I didn't want to wake her up. She looks so...Peaceful. Something I don't think I've ever thought I'd see...It was nice. Beautiful. She was beautiful. 

A sigh escapes my lips slowly beginning to move. The hand that rests against my stomach slowly begins to move. I stop and glance down to the hand knowing it's Lexa's now. Quickly I look back up to Lexa seeing her eyes begin to flutter open. I stay still hoping she doesn't wake up but she does. 

"Y/N," Lexa whispers sitting up straight. I close my eyes a second giving her a gentle smile. "Are you feeling okay?" 

"Y-Yeah-" I pause a second, opening my eyes and meeting Lexa's beautiful greens. "Wh-What's going on?" 

"You are safe now, Y/N. That is what matters." I look back and forth between the girl's eyes, confused at the commander's words. But that doesn't stop Lexa from removing her hand from my stomach and reaching up to the rag on my forehead. She removes it and places it off to the side. 

"Nyko said it's going to take a few days for you to heal," Lexa informs me. I nod. 

"Lexa, w-what happened with Clarke, Bellamy, Jasper and e-everyone?" I ask, looking to the girl. She remains silent looking back at my eyes. Her face was emotionless but her eyes...as always remain soft. 

"They are strong people Y/N." 

"Th-That's no what I asked-" I pause a second adding. "You l-left them there. Wherever th-the hell we were-" 

"Mount Weather," Lexa tells me. I look away from her. Some conversations I've had with Murphy and Octavia flood my mind. "Y/N, I did what was best for my people." 

"Your people? Weren't we your people considering we have an a-alliance?" I ask, looking back to the girl. 

"We do have an alliance with Skaikru, but I did what I had to. To get my people out of there." 

"Y-You could have gotten all of us-" 

"Maybe. But I had to do what I thought was best Y/N-" Lexa cuts me off pausing, slowly helping me sit up. I lean against the back of the couch, reaching my arm over to the side, clenching a hold of it. I open my eyes back up, seeing Lexa standing. "I did what I thought was best for you." 

My eyes grow wide and I look away from the girl. I shake my head and lean up from the couch. I try to push myself up to a standing position. But I couldn't. I was too weak and as I felt hands on my shoulders making me lean back, I knew Lexa knew too. And before either of us could speak again there was a knock at the door causing Lexa to shout for them to come in. I look to the door and spot a bald headed man and that same brown eyed girl Bellamy had left me with. 

"Titus, what is it?" Lexa asks. I keep my focus on the brown eyed girl seeing her look to Lexa and then to me. 

"The clans are here to talk. Echo would like to accompany the girl," Titus responds. A silence fills the air as I could sense the tenseness of everyone. 

"No," Lexa says. My eyes squint and I look to Titus and Echo who look a bit shocked. "Y/N is to stay here in my room. No one is to come in or out except myself. Echo you can stay outside this door and guard it." 

"Heda-" 

"Titus, I have made up my mind. Now go," Lexa cuts Titus off. No more words are exchanged as Echo nods her head and leaves. Titus soon following. Slowly I glance my eyes towards Lexa who turns around, locking our eyes. 

"Lexa..." I start but let my voice trail. 

"You should rest. I'll be back soon," Lexa says, nodding her head and turning away. My eyes follow her, watching her walk to her bed. She grabs her armor and puts it on. I say nothing. I don't even know what to say. So, I keep my eyes on her as she heads to the door. Once she opens it I can see Echo standing outside the door, but Lexa only nods and continues on. A sigh escapes my lips, leaning my head back and closing my eyes. I'm not entirely sure what I was suppose to do. Did I want to sleep? Hell yeah, but my mind was going 1,000 miles per second and I couldn't get my head to shut up. I couldn't think straight. 

I wanted to talk more with Lexa. I wanted to make sure my people were okay. Obviously there was a plan in place. Bellamy had went into Mount Weather to rescue Monty, Jasper, Miller, Harper and the rest of the 100. And Lexa and the grounders were there for backup. There was a plan, so why did Lexa make a deal with the people of Mount Weather? Just to get her people back when I know for a fact she could've saved everyone in there. Skaikru and Trikru. But she chose not too, why? It doesn't make any sense to me...My bag! 

My eyes pop open and I scan the room. I look about and don't spot my bag but I do see a variety of candles around the room. Not lit of course, but damn there sure was a lot. A sigh escapes my lips as I push myself up and continue scanning the room finding no sight of my bag. At this moment I'm not entirely sure what to do. I want my bag, my journal. A heavy breathe escapes my nose as I begin pushing myself up off of the couch. I manage to get to my feet successfully, but when I begin to take a step I feel my knees buckle beneath me. I hit the ground hard and immediately hear the door open. My eyes glance up to spot Echo rushing towards me and bending down. 

"I'm okay. I'm okay," I say, placing my hands on the ground and slightly pushing myself up. 

"You should be resting," Echo speaks, her voice hushed. I stop pushing myself up and look to Echo's brown eyes. She looks back at me and shakes her head. "The commander is going to kill me." 

"Why? Because you heard me fall and came in to check on me?" I question earning a tilt of the head from Echo. But she says nothing as she takes a hold of my arms, helping me up. She takes my right arm and places it over her shoulders, guiding me over to the bed, setting me down. But I don't lay down. I can't. 

"Heda wants you to rest." Echo clenches her jaw. Her brown eyes switching back and forth between my eyes. I nod my head slowly, looking around the room once again. 

"Have you seen my bag?" I ask her, finally looking back at her. 

"No, but I'm sure I can figure out where it is." Echo takes a step back. "Rest. If you need anything I'll be outside the door." I nod and Echo turns on her heels heading for the door. I keep my eyes on her, a bit confused. But nonetheless I watch her leave the room. The door shutting behind her. A sigh escapes my lips once more as I look down to the bed. It looks comfy. And I should get some rest... Without any more delays I slowly lean back. I look up to the ceiling and just stare at it. I felt weird, but not in a bad way. It felt almost normal laying here. I do miss the comfort of Lexa too. But I can't do anything about that right now. Another sigh escapes my lips as I close my eyes and slowly drift off to sleep.