lick a sewer pipe or lick a toilet seat after a fat man sat on it?

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Jig:WELL SEEING HOW YOU DESCRIBED THE TOILET SEAT CHOICE, I WOULD RATHER EAT THE SEWER PIPE.
(During so) God damn this is crunchy..Uggghhhhh...OH GOD ITS WET. EW
After: (lays on floor and constipates life)
Me: You gave Jig a trauma attack.

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