Universal Constant | LISOO

CHAPTER 7

LISA'S POV

                     I once watched a (horrible) movie where this huge, buff guy was pierced by a shard of glass in his leg. He had this girl pull it out and asked her to cauterize it before he bleeds dry. And regardless of how strong he looks and how high his pain tolerance seems, his face still unflatteringly contorts in pain; a desperate groan flits through his teeth, biting hard on a cloth in his mouth.

He was in complete and total anguish. But I'd trade places with him if I can.

There's a level of pain that's too much for your heart to contain that it shoots in every part of your body; that it pains you physically even if there's no physical wound present; like there's a nerve damage appearing and concentrated in random places making the pain more immense and intense. It stings in your chest one second, then the pit of your stomach, then the tips of your fingers, then the temples of your head, then all of them at the same time. Around and around, it travels. And it's so exasperating and maddening because no treatment can heal it and no amount of pain killers can dull the pain. You feel.

There's no escape. It is persistent and you can't run from it. It will catch you, pin you on the ground, put you in a chokehold until your throat constricts and your lungs beg for air, and force you to tap out.

And all of that can happen in only a matter of seconds. The mere seconds when the arguably most important person in your life recoils at your touch.

I despise myself for failing to hold my emotions in when Jisoo did that and she had to witness me collapse because someone guilted into staying is something I will never wish for anyone. If she's uncomfortable with me, she has every right to feel so and I should respect that.

I knew it could happen, but nothing could've ever prepared me for the pain. I told her I'll understand and I do, but that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt.

"Whoa, you look like shit," is Rosie's hello when she accepts my facetime.

"Can't believe you actually answered," I muse. She rarely answers her calls, and almost always ignores texts, so I'm for real surprised.

Her eyebrow quirks. Worry creases her forehead.

"Where are you? And why do you look like you just got curved?" Rosie asks sternly, ignoring my attempt to stir the subject.

"The park. On top of a slide." I nip on my chapped lips and sigh. Hearing myself say it just makes me think about how stupid this is. A big, adult girl finding safety in a kids' playground because she's a coward. "And well, cos I just did get... curved."

Shock settles on Rosie's face as it comes closer and closer on my screen. And before I realize what's happening, there's a loud plop of something hitting skin, the screen turns black, and a pained groan follows soon after.

"Oh my god? Are you alright?"

"I-I'm fine. I'm fine!" She squeaks the moment her face was back on again, a little disoriented, and a part of her cheek where her phone landed a little reddish. She nurses it with her hand and winces. "Fuck, that's gonna bruise."