2.0 The Chronicles of Us - Shame & Blame

Chapter nineteen

*♡ Ellie ♡*

Jonathan steps in front of me, waggling his brows and doing something weird with his hips. "Did you put on your dancing shoes?"

I throw some shade at him in the form of a scowl. "You made me wear heels, so no."

"Don't be such a sourpuss. Tonight will be fun. Look at this place! It's grander than a million bucks."

Gold and white seems to be theme of the evening. The colors are shown throughout all the decorations. Golden bows and table runners accompany shell-white silk. "Yes, it's amazing, but I'm here to work. Remember?"

His moves have evolved from hip-twists to double finger-pointing. "Only until the first dance. After that, you're free to party with us."

I wish I could share his excitement, but I'm already so tired. My feet hurt and my soul even more so. "We'll see about that. I'm getting some food first. The buffet looks delicious."

He nods, pulling his tweed jacket straight. "Don't skip the dessert bar. There's a croquembouche."

I peek a glance. Oh boy ... it's my sweetest dream come to life. Footed cake stands with pies in different flavors are placed around not one, but three chocolate fountains. Generously filled platters with cookies, tiny tarts and powdered donuts occupy the spaces in between. And don't even get me started on the topped-off bowls with marshmallows and lady fingers for dipping purposes.

Saliva fills my mouth, but I manage to pull my nose. "Meh, you know I don't like sugary food."

Since he met me post-Tex, he doesn't know about my self-imposed punishment, so he shrugs and leaves me to find his newly official beau, Aaron.

Earlier today, Aaron's cousin, Felicity, got married at city hall. It was absolutely perfect. The bride wore a gorgeous mermaid dress and the groom looked as dapper as they come. The marble flooring and chandeliers made it extra special. Naturally, tears tumbled from my eyes when the officiant announced them husband and wife. Partly because of the beautiful portrayal of true love, but they were mostly due to the Tex-sized hole in my chest.

I didn't come with Jonathan as a guest. No, I was hired as the official photographer. My first paid job. I thought about declining the money, but I could really use it to invest in new equipment and perhaps even a website. Aaron recommended me, of course. His cousin went through a small crisis when her photographer cancelled last-minute. So, here I am. I was terribly nervous but somehow, giving out orders on where to stand and how to pose felt normal.

I fill a plate with a piece of boneless chicken and sautéed greens and then walk around the room. A jazz band plays some mellow tunes while everyone enjoys their food. Once back behind my camera, I capture the happiness that's written across every present face. Felicity does some silly dance moves and Jonathan talks to Aaron's mother. She throws her head back and laughs at something he said. The camera acts as a shield, allowing me to witness these intimate moments without being part of it.

When the lights dim, it's showtime. The happy couple makes its way to the middle of the floor for their first dance. Drunk relatives cheer them on. The open bar is being frequented a lot. The bride and groom sway to a romantic ballad. Frank Sinatra, I think.

My mind conjures up a fantasy where Tex and I do our first dance. I know it's unrealistic. Not only because we're not together anymore but also because marriage was not something he desired. He didn't even believe in love. Still, the ghost of his touch lingers on my skin. I can almost feel it while I imagine us in each other's arms, dancing the night away. I chuckle and readjust my fantasy. He would cuss the entire time. Dancing must be a nightmare to him.