All Things Mortal! (The Cruel Prince One shots/Fanfic)

Chapter 8 : Cardan the Lemon

"Welcome back to another episode of, All Things Mortal!!!, this is your host Cardan Greenbriar" I say, sitting down next to Jude, "Soo my darling wife, would you like to tell all our the people watching what happed last time?"

She rolls her eyes, "Last episode, you planned a special party for me, to celebrate our one year aniversary..." I subtly gesture for her to continue, which makes her roll her eyes again, "And you sang a song for me, expressing you love and respect for your wife." 

I scowl, that was not what we practiced, she was supposed to say how much she loved me. Jude takes in my expression and shakes her head, She stands up in front of me, arms on her hips, grinning.

"And I loved it," she says, leaning down so that her hair falls between us in waves (I love it when she wears her hair down, It makes we want to run my fingers through her beautiful auburn curls) "And I love you," she gives me a small smile before brushing her lips against mine, a promise of something more. 

I wrap my hand around her waist, unable to hold back, and pull her closer. Jude just laughs and tips her head back, letting her hair flow out behind her. I tangle my finger in her hair and  whisper against her neck, "This isn't over" 

She shivers, and presses her forehead against mine, "This isn't over for sure" Jude sighs, her breath hot against my face, and pulls back. 

I wink at the camera, "I'm pretty sure most people out there just said 'aww' and you want more, but its time to get back to buissness!" Jude lets out a choked laugh from beside me, "I doubt anyone out there want to watch two people kissing on TV"

I raise my eyebrows at her as I recall the very intimate movie we watched on TV a few days back. Jude seems to remmber this too because she adds, "Well most people."

I laugh quitely and Jude glares at me, "Coming back to the show, today I have something that you will like!" She places a small box in front of me and grins, "We gonna try hair dye!!!"

"Hair dye?" I repeat. She opens the box and pulls out some packets, a brush and some gloves. "Yes, we can temporarly change the colour of your hair with this." I might have been gaping at her because she laughs, "No Cardan, this isn't magic." 

Oh, that makes more sense. "Is that what Heather uses?" I ask Jude. She nodds, "Yes, Heather uses hair dye, but hers is permanant, we are going to use temporary hair dye. It will go in a few days" 

Jude comes and stands behind me and I turn around to look at what she's doing. She picks up two packets and raises her eyebrows, "Gold or silver?" I point to the gold one and she grins. I like gold, it makes me look more kingly. Silver gives a 'I'm a prince in need of coddling' vibe. (Vivi is rubbing off on me)

 She wears the gloves, which stick to her hands like a second skin and then tears open the packet. "Shouldn't you use the brush?" I ask her. She shrugs, "It just says 'apply dye on hair' on the packet." Jude gestures for me to turn around, and I oblige. She sqeezes the packet over my head and I flinch as it touches my head.

Judes fingers slip into my hair and I feel a shiver go down my spine as she rubs the dye into my hair. "This feels good, you should bath me more often." She snorts and I hear her mummble something quite dirty. I grin and grab her wrist, pressing a light kiss against her palm.

"Cardan, let me finish.." I press another kiss to her pulse point and let her hand go. After about a few minutes her massaging my scalp, she steps back and gives me a once over, "It doesn't look too bad for my first time."

Jude helps me get up and wash off the the dye. When I face her, she tries to hold in her laughter, but fails. Terribly.

I frown, "Is it that bad?" She laughs, falling down on the sofa, "Your hair- its- its" She hands me a mirror and I look at my reflection.

My hair, its completly YELLOW!

               ******************************************

Cardan looks like a lemon. No a tulip! A big, brooding, yellow tulip! (Get the refrence?) He's currenly sulking on the couch, mummbling about how beautiful his hair used to be. I sigh, I've had enough of this, "Cardan, get up."

He look at me with his black eyes and scowls, looking like the boy who used to kick dirt in my food not so long ago. "Cardan..." I growl, "get your butt of that couch right now!" He stands up in front of me and crosses his arms. 

"I look horrifying!" he shouts, gesturing to himself "I used to be so beautiful, people used to love me." He flops down on the couch again, and covers his eyes with his arm. (typical drama queen pose) "I will forever be shamed, never again will anyone see my now hideous face!"

"Cardan..." I warn. He sits up in his chair suddenly, as if remmbering something, "Jude my dear, I want you to lock me up in the Tower of Forgetting, until my memory has been wiped from the minds of my subjects."

I groan. Leave it to Cardan to make a scene out of hair dye. "Cardan..." I repeat. He shakes his head, "No Jude, I know you will miss me, but I belive you can make it on your own. You do all the work anyway. I am just a presence, a firgurehead, a nothing..."

I would never think of Cardan that way, he's the only reason I survive in court. "CARDAN!" I shout, finally getting his attention, "The hair dye is temporary you moron, it will go in a few days." His eyes widen, "Ahh, I forgot about that.."

 I roll my eyes and sit down next to him, leaning in. "Either ways" I whisper, my lips brushing his, "you're still beautiful, yellow hair or not" I feel him grin and look up into his black eyes, "Hmm, then now its your turn, my love"

I jump back, "My turn?" He nodds exictedly, his yellow hair bobbing up and down, "Yes, yes, now I get to try this out on you!" I stare at him, "Is this revenge for what I did to you?" He picks up a packet and holds it up next to my hair, "Perfect! and no this isn't revenge, I love your hair too much to let it get spoilt"

I take in his exictedness and shake my head, "Fine, but it should look nice.." He rolls his eyes, as if it could be anything but nice, "Now stay still..." 

Cardan uses a brush, unlike me, and does it much more slower. One lock at a time. It takes him about half and hour or so but he seems so happy, that I don't want to ruin his joy. He also seems to be humming, which is so unlike him.

"Done!" he says, jumping up and down. Cardan ushers me to the sink and makes me wash me hair. I towel it quickly and come stand in front of him. His eyes seem to be gleaming.

"Soo.. how is it?" I ask him. He runs a hand through my curls and smiles, "see for yourself" I hold a the mirror in front of myself and gasp. I look... diffrent. Cardan coloured the ends of my hair with a reddish brown, as if dipped in blood. It suits me. (refer the picture above)

I turn to Cardan, who is biting his lip in exictment. "It looks beautiful" I tell him. His face lights up, "You look beautiful." He leans down and presses a light kiss to my head, and I wrap my arms around him, pressing my face into his chest. 

"Well eyeryone, today was quite a weird episode." Cardan says to the camera, "and even thought it didn't start out quite well it turned out quite amazing" I turn around and wave to the camera, "So goodbye, and we'll see you next time."

I look up at Cardan and laugh, "Did I mention that you look like a lemon." He scowls at me and runs a hand through his hair, "I think I can pull this off." I roll my eyes and say, "you can pull anything off." Which makes us both laugh.

                 **************************************

(A/N)

Helloooo helloooo, I know I haven't updated in quite sometime cause I've had a bucketload of HW! But I wrote an extra looooooong chapter to make up for it.

I can't belive im soooo close to 1K... Annnd when we reach that milestone! I might have another suprise up my sleeve.

I wanna give a HUGE shoutout to @paigejacksonnn for supporting me, and commenting on my work! TYSM! (for the hundreth time)

I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, please vote and comment, I accept any critisism.

An overly greatful girl, Nova