SnK Oneshots

Eren x Reader i

"God I'm sorry I suck..." You paused, glancing at Eren, your boyfriend of a few years. He looked at you in concern. That was random and out of the blue. "YOUR DICK!" You giggled hysterically, rolling backwards on the shared mattress.
Eren looked a little shocked at your little "joke," before joining in and laughing as well. "What the hell y/n? I thought something was wrong."
"Well something is wrong, I just don't want to say it out loud at the moment." You admitted after you stopped cackling, sitting up. Eren looked at you then, setting aside his laptop (not before logging out of his tumblr of course) and giving you all of his attention.
"You can tell me anything, you know that right y/n?" He murmured, taking one of your hands in his warm, comforting ones.
You gently pulled them away. "Of course I know that, you ass... I just don't... know how to say it..."
Eren paused. A muscle in his jaw jumped as he clenched his teeth. you thought you saw tears well up in his eyes. "Y/n... tell me who it is..."
You picked at the sheets that were covering your legs. Glancing up briefly, you saw his eyes. They were glassy, like if you touched them, they would shatter. They were also very angry; intense. You were baffled.
"Wh-"
"Cut the bull y/n! I want to know! I'll beat him up! I-I'll change! What do you want? Money? Sex? I can try harder! Just please! Tell me who and why you're cheating on me!" His voice cracked and he fell onto your stomach, sobbing softly.
You gently pet his head. Laughing on the inside of how stupid he was. And sweet. And adorable. And how much you loved him.
You lifted his head up to your face and gave his lips a quick peck. "You dumbass, you think I'm cheating on you? Dude. I have known you since we were five. I love you. I would never do something that stupid."
Eren perked up a little bit, blushing furiously at his little break down. "O-oh... then what did you want to say?"
You blushed this time. "Ahhhh... yourpulloutgametooweak..."
Eren cocked his head to the side. "what?"
"Who a dad?"
"...Yours?"
"You. You is a dad."
Eren sat up, staring intently at you before deciding that you weren't joking and hugging you around the middle fiercely. He kissed you sweetly, then kissed your stomach. He bounced around the bed a little then around the bedroom. He danced around a little.
Then he ran to the balcony, thrusting the doors open, and screamed, "I AM A FATHER BIIIIITTTTCCHHH FUCK YEAAAAHHH!"
A clatter from above startled Eren and he looked up to see the neighbors glaring down at him in robes. "EREN. SHUT THE HELL UP."
"NO. YOU KNOW WHAT? IT IS 3:30 IN THE AFTERNOON AND I DONT HAVE TIME FOR YOU HORSEFACE!"
You laughed from your spot on the bed.
"Hey Eren." Called a kinder voice.
"Oh hey Marco! Guess what? I is a dad!"
"I pity the child." You faintly heard the grumble.
"Oh go back to fucking you buttheads!" Eren called, flicking a finger up, more at Jean than Marco.
Eren left the patio, not bothering to close the doors and went to your side like a puppy. He kissed you again, lingering a moment, before breaking apart but staying close enough to feel each other's warm breath.
"I'm gonna be a dad y/n."
"And I'm gonna be a mom Eren."

(A/n: wow... haha... I needed some happy... and in sorry I haven't been updating I just... life... ilysm)