Love or power? This is the real question

CHAPTER 18

HELL

Pov Sabrina

I recovered and realized I was in my bed. How did I get there? And above all what happened to me?

I tried to get out of bed but couldn't, I don't have the strength to do it. I feel suffocated as if there is a large boulder on my chest that prevents me from breathing normally.

I rest my head on the pillow again trying to remember what had happened.

I remember me and Josh going down the stairs, it's all dark around us, we were heading towards the cell of the leader of the hunters because he had declared that he wanted to talk to me alone.

From then on my memories get more confused than ever and my head starts to ache.

A voice from the other side of the room said to me "You finally woke up !!".

"How long have I been unconscious?"

Gaius took a few steps forward towards me and replied that I slept for a good fourteen hours, an infinity of lost time. What I couldn't afford at this time, with all the things happening, was just wasting time.

I wonder why I had this collapse, so I asked my doctor "Why did I faint doctor?".

"I'm afraid I have to tell you for something far more serious than a drop in sugar or a drop in blood pressure."

"What are you going to tell me doctor with this?"

After taking a deep breath, I answered my question by saying just what I didn't want to hear.

"I think the time has come for you to abdicate the throne and lead a more peaceful life only in this way can you hope to improve over time."

I replied resignedly "Are you kidding me? You know better than me that now more than ever I can't give up everything and leave everything to chance."

With a firm voice he exclaimed "Yet you have to do it!"

With a weak tone of voice I replied that I could not.

"I can not ..."

"You lead a very busy life if you don't give yourself a respite what awaits you is death, is that what you want?"

I remained silent, not answering his question, looking away and then answering his question.

"Someone among us has helped a group of hunters infiltrate here, the infernal courts are restless, in Greendale the devil only knows what is happening there ... Tell me how can I do?"

After what had passed a few minutes, hours to me, of silence Gaius spoke up and said "There would be a solution ... ''.

"What would it be?"

He replied "I know of a remedy that could slow down the course of the disease, if you agree to undergo the treatment you would have time to resolve the various issues."

Did I have any other choice?

No, I didn't have it. There was nothing left for me but to agree.

"How exactly does this disease progress?"

As I listened to what he was saying, a question arose in me to which I cannot answer myself.

"Doctor when I leave the throne what will I do?"

He turns to me and replied "This could be an opportunity to make peace with your family and friends in Greendale."

I would really like to think so but it is simply not possible now our paths divided a long time ago when I took on this role.

Obviously I will always have their fate at heart but I firmly believe that a possible reunion between us is impossible, if I am honest with myself I don't even want it to happen.

I remember that as a young man I would have fought with all my strength to stay in Greendale and not give up what I had and who I was.

What I didn't know is that that battle was already lost by the time I signed that damn book. From the moment my name was written on that page with my sague, that young girl so impulsive and full of plans for the future to be realized was slowly starting to disappear.

This painful internal death was brought about by various events in my life starting with my breakup with Harvey.

My first love, my first boyfriend, my first disappointment.

I still remember that feeling of bewilderment the instant I confessed my true half-witch nature to him, I didn't believe in such a negative reaction.

I expected more understanding from the person I believed to be so intimately connected with me.

I didn't know he wasn't ready for this kind of truth.

A succession of events that hit me very hard that I thought I had overcome with my second love.

Thinking about it maybe it was better this way.

Just like that suddenly Nicholas had entered my life. Although at the time I was still engaged, it took a fraction of a second to feel buried by doubts, but above all incredibly attracted to Nicholas.

An unforgettable thrill.

I will never forget what he did for me.

I reach out to the bedside drawer, open it and take my father's diary that was stored inside.

Closed the drawer I carry the diary close to my chest holding it very tightly to me. Holding him so close I still feel that intense emotion.

This diary was given to me by Nicholas.

Sweet memories like our first kiss in the academy play in our roles Lucifer and Lilith, the lovers' dance, the afternoons spent together in the academy library, our passionate kisses will not disappear from my memories, especially from my heart.

The regret felt in knowing from Nicholas that our story began only because of my father's will to push me into the dark world is unsurpassable.

My happiness the moment I managed to get him out of hell vanished with the desperation of the moment he asked me to leave.

After all, I hadn't been able to be with him as I wanted when he was in trouble, while he has always supported me in everything in the past.

So I can only wish him the best for him.

In my last days in Greendale the sense of exclusion increased in me. Everyone goes on with their lives while I was bogged down.

The thing that went beyond all limits was the discussion with my aunt.

"I think my family and I can't go back to what they used to be ..." I said resigned.

He replied "Then you'll start over."

To get rid of one last doubt I asked him "If things were to get masculine and the treatment didn't work, what exactly would happen to me?"

"If in case the infection progresses further it would affect the lungs later, if the male could not be treated it would affect the heart, at that moment it would mean certain death."

He took his things and left the door giving me a last goodbye.

My brother arrived shortly after.