Pokémon Sword and Shield Gym Leader Family (REQUESTS OPEN)

Piers teaches arson

(Please do not take this seriously in any way possible. Also there is a lot of swearing and stupid.) 

Piers rolled out of bed as you do and fell onto the floor, probably breaking his fucking spine. He immediately decided that Early O'clock was the perfect time to blast 1000 Gecs. Totally perfect time. Perfect time. Totally. 

That was probably the biggest fuck up he could do because everyone woke up and now was a damn babysitter. Great. Maybe don't blast 1000 Gecs at Early O'clock PIERS.

He decided that if he gets to babysit actual children why not cause world chaos because that's a totally rational thought to have. 

He yeeted out his phone and called his totally friend not me shipping Piers with Leon and Raihan ahaaaaaaaaaa no homo bro,

"HEY LEON. CAN I STEA-- BORROW YOUR CHARIZARD?"

"Oh hi Piers. What you need it for?"

"Life lessons for children."

"That's surprisingly wholesome of you."

"Bitch I am the most wholesome bitch you've ever met you fucking bitch." 

"Uh ok then I'll give you the Charizard."

"Just throw it over man. Throw it at my head."

"Ok."

Later Piers had obtained the Charizard and dragged the childrens outside,

"Ok you little shits who wants to learn how to commit arson?"

Allister tilted his head because he is TOO DAMN WHOLESOME FOR THIS EARTH,

"What's arson?"

"GREAT QUESTION. Ok so alright- basically- pretend that this.... half eaten lollipop I just found on the dirt, it's probably edible, is a piece of property, specifically Rose's because fuck that bitch."

He threw out Leon's Charizard,

"Ok and arson is when you just set the shit on fire. Like this."

Charizard did a pew pew fire go burn burn arson is fun 10/10 I recommend and the lollipop died. RIP Lollipop 1966-2020.

Piers did a big clappy,

"And that's you arson. And the responsible thing to do is to tell you not to do it but I'm not that. So have fun. Later bitches. I am above the law." 

Piers yeeted inside and blasted Mindless Self Indulgence while screaming it at the top of his lungs.

Probably hours or something idk time is an illusion later, Piers's phone rang,

"The fuck you wan bitch?"

Twas the man who gets lost every 5 seconds,

"PIERS WHY IS THE BATTLE TOWER ON FIRE?"

"Oh damn those kids did arson."

"DID YOU TEACH THEM ARSON?"

"Maybe yes."

"PIERS THE TOWER IS ON FIRE. WHY IS HOP CHANTING ARSON--"

"Because arson you uncultured dumb."

"HOLY FUCK BEDE JUST SET ROSE ON FIRE."

"Fuck yeah good for him."

"PIERS ROSE IS FUCKING DEAD- HE DIED."

"Cool. Put Bede on the phone."

"PIERS HE'S GONNA GO TO PRISON FOR MURDER--"

"Prison's not THAT bad I've played Poptropica I know how prison works."

"WHAT IS A POPTROPICA?"

"SHUT. PUT BEDE ON PHONE."

"O K."

Leon threw the phone at Bede,

"Hi Piers. I murdered Rose."

"Good fuckin job kid. I'll get you ice cream when you're out of prison."

"Why not just set the cops on fire?"

"Oh yeah Anarchy good idea."

And then they took over the universe with the power of arson.

The end. 

Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay.