Another Life

6

Today was the first morning I woke up without the immediate need to jump out of bed and run to the bathroom, which I was happy about for many reasons. Don't get me wrong, I still felt as though I had been up for consecutive nights without any sleep and the nauseous feeling was still hanging over me like some ominous rain cloud, but at least I didn't throw up.

It had now been five days since I had found out I was pregnant, the morning following the doctor's appointment. Taking the doctor's advice from yesterday, I got out of bed slowly and went straight down into the kitchen, actually feeling genuinely hungry for the first time since I had found out too.

I could hear Jay and Macie in the living room as I grabbed some crackers from the cabinet, fighting off the sick feeling as much I could in an attempt to not have the morning ruined by hanging over a toilet bowl again, switching the pot on to heat up the water inside as I pop one of the crackers into my mouth, heading into the living room as the water heats.

Jay sends me a smile as he sees me appear in the doorway, taking away his attention from Macie - resulting in her letting out a scream to get his attention back, which in turn only made Jay and I laugh.

He gets up from the couch, towering over her. "What is it, Mace? What is it?" He asks as he picks her up into his arms sideways, holding her as someone would a collection of logs before turning on his heels to look at me. "How are you feeling this morning?"

I nod slowly, hoping that I don't jinx it. Hugging a toilet was the worst way to wake up in the morning. "Better. I mean I still feel like shit but I don't feel like I'm gonna bolt up from my seat at any given moment to throw up."

Jay tilts his head to one side. "That's good then."

I can't help but shoot a smile. "Yeah, at least it means I might be able to go back to work today." I say before catching glimpse of the light on top of the pot turning green in the corner of my eye, making me walk into the kitchen before Jay could reply.

That had been something that had been annoying me a little. To this point, everyone in the unit thought I had caught something from Macie, and I intended on them thinking that until we got over the riskiest part of the pregnancy, but that had meant I wasn't able to return until I stopped throwing up.

I grab everything I needed for the drink, grabbing one of the ginger teabags Jay had picked up from the store last night after Patterson had recommended it to help fight off the nausea.

When I head over to the fridge to grab the milk I catch sight of one of the changes to the front that hadn't been there when I went to bed.

For the most part the front of the fridge was bare, other than a few important pieces of paper held there to avoid us forgetting about them and for months there had been a selfie of me, Jay and Macie I had taken last Christmas, being held up by lettered magnets we had bought to help Macie with her speech and to keep her out of harms way if she insisted on being in the kitchen with us as we cooked - the letters H, J, and M stuck on three of the edges of the print out. There was a new addition to the front, the ultrasound from yesterday stuck just underneath the selfie, being held up by another one of the lettered magnets - the letter B.

I can feel my eyes sting a little with tears, unsure of really why, it was just a picture on a fridge. I rub them clear when I see Jay enter the room, looking to him as I did. "You bastard." I curse, opening the fridge and grabbing the milk.

Jay doesn't bring it up, jumping right over it and burying his eyebrows down on his face as he takes a few steps closer to me. "You're going back to work?" He asks, his voice telling me he was surprised.

I briefly bring my eyes to meet his before focusing on making the tea. "Well yeah, of course."

"You and I both know you shouldn't be going out into the field now though."