Another Life

12

Another week later we found ourselves back inside the office again just two weeks after we had been here the last time. This time though there were no hysterical laughs coming from Macie to keep her occupied or obnoxious squeaks coming from the stool Jay was sat on when he was unable to keep still as we waited, the room was dead silent as both of us were nervous to say something. The only thing that was the same was the unnerving feeling I had from all those fucking pictures on the wall.

Jay had been optimistic for the past two weeks, not letting the appointment today get to him but all of a sudden this morning he had turned quiet on the drive over here, and he had barely said a word since. I had been the same, the nerves for the appointment and what we would be told eating me up inside as we waited for Leah to come into the room.

We had been called in from the waiting room maybe ten minutes ago, double the amount of time it usually would be, and I was quickly getting agitated. I just wanted this but to be over, I just wanted to know.

At some point my leg began jumping, the rustle of the limb hitting the tissue paper-like roll that covered the examination chair echoed through the room, the only thing to break through the tension. Once Jay noticed it he scooted forward, the tell-tale squeak piercing through the room from the stool as he leaned, and he put his hand on my knee to try and calm it, but he doesn't say anything.

Another few minutes pass with us remaining in the position and then eventually the door opens, doctor Patterson coming in silently as well, feeding off the vibe of the room.

Her voice is not nearly what it usually is, and the normally permanent smile is gone. "Hey guys, how's things today with you both?"

We both nod cautiously but we don't say anything.

Leah feeds off this and then gives us a reassuring smile, but I scanned my eyes over her and I couldn't tell if it was fake. "Now we're gonna proceed as normal, we'll check your blood pressure, urine sample, check for baby's heartbeat on the doppler and then get the ultrasound going to see how baby's developing." She says, already reaching for the blood pressure cuff.

I cut her movements short, stopping her half-reach for the cuff on the table. "Can we do the doppler first?" I ask.

Patterson looks back to me and smiles, nodding her head and going over to the other side of the room to retrieve the handheld device as I lied down in the chair, pulling the shirt I was wearing up over the growing bump and untying the hairband from the jeans that was doing little to make the pants more comfortable before I roll the waistband down once so it doesn't get in the way.

Like before, Leah warns me of the temperature of the gel and on it goes. I can hear Jay move upwards and next to my head by the squeaking coming from the stool, I had my eyes glued on the ceiling and I didn't intend to move them, and then he grabs my hand. The probe goes on and the room is filled with static again - she had put more gel on this time so the static wasn't as loud, but it was still there, it's all I could hear.

She starts moving the probe around my abdomen and my stomach starts doing flips, tying itself in knots as the static just continues. I could feel Jay's hand in mine get tighter, his grip hardening as nothing comes out the doppler. All there was was static.

Just as my heart sinks, as I call it quits and the thought of the worst case scenario I had built up in my head begins to set in, is when I hear it, the silence of the room aiding that ability. It was quiet, but it definitely wasn't static. Then the probe moves the tiniest bit to the left and the sound becomes so much louder, the clear sound of a heartbeat filling the room.

Jay and I both move our gazes to the doppler, watching it and Leah as her face softens into a bright smile once again. She nods, grinning as she reads off the doppler before she puts her gaze on both of us. "Heartbeat's one-forty-one."